


Lavender Boy

by Fuckyamcha



Category: Original Work
Genre: Age Difference, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Canon Gay Relationship, Childhood Memories, Cyber sex, Dirty Talk, Drunken Kissing, Face-Fucking, Facials, Foursome - M/M/M/M, Gay, Group Sex, Hand Jobs, Interracial Relationship, M/M, Making Out, Male-Female Friendship, Masturbation in Shower, Morning Sex, Multi, Orgy, Original Gay Male Character, Recreational Drug Use, Rimming, Secret Relationship, Sexting, Sexual Fantasy, Somnophilia, Tags will be added with each chapter, Teacher-Student Relationship, ass jobs, camboy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-05
Updated: 2021-03-14
Packaged: 2021-03-16 04:55:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 53,743
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28576350
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fuckyamcha/pseuds/Fuckyamcha
Summary: Cody's always been known as apretty boy.What exactly does having such a pretty face and a perfect body land you when you attract the attention of the school's golden boy, a gorgeous professor, your brother's best friends, your roommate's DILF of a father, and a hot bodyguard with a secret past?This is the story of a beautiful androgynous gay young man and the adventures of all of the relationships in his life that he holds dear to his heart.(Original M/M coming-of-age erotica story)
Relationships: Original Character(s)/Original Character(s), Original Character/Other(s), Original Male Character/Original Male Character
Kudos: 35





	1. Prologue: Daniel

**Author's Note:**

> This is an original erotica story that I didn't know where else to post. I hope you all enjoy it even if it's basically just a way for me to get out some sexual frustrations. Cody as a character is kind of an alter ego of mine and this story is kind of an exploration of sexuality I never got to experience. Stay tuned for more chapters.

Hey, there. My name’s Cody. Let me tell you, my love life is pretty weird. 

I know you’re probably thinking; ‘how weird can this dude’s love life _actually_ be?’ Well, let me give some insight into my life leading up to my very first relationship. 

I’ve always been known as a _‘pretty’_ boy. Even now, people have always looked at me and admired me for my young-looking face, my messy blonde hair that somehow looked effortlessly good, and my blue eyes as bright as the sky yet soft as the ocean (that’s what someone said to me once, I found that pretty strange).

Despite all the attention I got from others, I’ve always been pretty shy. It’s always been kind of hard for me to hold conversations with people, I usually prefer doing my own thing. That’s why I don’t really have that many friends, I spent most of my life at school keeping to myself. I wasn’t lonely or anything, it was just something I preferred. 

Well, that kind of all changed when I met the first person I ever fell in love with, Daniel Thompson. Yeah, he definitely still has a place in my heart. Of course, we were young boys when we started dating—only fourteen years old, so we never really got to do much together, considering the environment we were in.

You see, for all of my life my christian parents put me in private all-boy catholic schools. My parents always kind of taught me that sex was taboo—even the mention of any kind of sexual activity, so I was never really properly educated on that stuff growing up.

So, you know how I learned about sex? The good ol’ internet, of course. 

I was really sneaky about it. Being the curious fourteen year old that I was, I learned about clearing the browser history and eventually private browsing mode. It wasn’t exactly explicit porn that intrigued me (in fact, it actually _scared_ me), but rather erotic fiction. 

I’ve always been a reader. I loved to read, always loved using my own imagination to explore new and different things that I couldn’t experience in real life. So, I learned all about sex through fanfictions and stories online. Sex was one of those subjects that was so new to me, just waiting for me to explore it. It was like the forbidden fruit. 

Anyways, back to the subject of Daniel—I remember my first day as a freshman at school, the desks were arranged in pairs, and I sat by myself in the corner at the front of the classroom next to the window. Everybody seemed to already know each other, but for some reason, he sat next to me, even when there were other seats available. 

_“Hi there, my name’s Daniel,”_ he said to me with a grin. I remember how handsome and tall he was, he had curly black hair and a piercing in his left ear. He had a really nice smile. 

It was slightly confusing to me why this good-looking, obviously charismatic boy would have wanted to sit next to me out of anybody else. But I wasn’t ungrateful or annoyed or anything like that. To be honest, I was happy. 

_“I’m Cody,”_ I said to him with a small nod before going back to reading my book. For some reason, I was feeling a little bit nervous around him. My heart was beating faster in my chest. 

He smelled like typical teenage boy body spray, but somehow, it wasn’t overpowering or cheap scented. It was subtle, it was nice. I liked it. 

The classroom began to fill up with more students, and the teacher still hadn’t come yet. Daniel turned to me. _“So, what school are you from, Cody?”_

_This smalltalk is going to stress me out,_ I remember thinking to myself. _“Saint James,”_ I responded, much too shy to look him in the eyes.

_“Oh, cool. I’m from McCall,”_ he said with another smile. He seemed to look at my uniform, which was the school’s sweater with a collared white shirt underneath. _“I see you went for the school sweater, huh? I actually prefer the sweater vest, myself. Gives my arms a bit of freedom to move,”_ he said, popping his collar with a little chuckle. I just silently nodded in response.

When the teacher finally arrived and began teaching her lesson, I noticed Daniel doodling something in his notebook that he had out. Since I wasn’t paying much attention either, I decided to read my book as she went on with whatever she was talking about, before Daniel had subtly slid his notebook in my direction.

_“What book are you reading?”_ His badly written message said with a little smiley face beside it. It was kind of cute. 

I picked up my pen before writing, _“Lamb In a Box.”_ I clicked my pen before sliding the notebook back to him.

He began to write something down again as the teacher continued to speak. He slid the notebook back to me before I read, _“You seem so interested in it. Wanna have lunch and you can tell me about it?”_

_This guy is really inviting me to have lunch with him?_ I thought to myself, almost in disbelief. _Well, I guess it couldn’t hurt. He seems like a nice guy._

I slightly smiled to myself before I wrote, _“Okay”_ with a smiley face beside it. I slid the notebook back to him and he seemed to smile to himself before closing his notebook and beginning to pay attention to the lesson. 

* * *

After the class was over and everyone began to pack up their things and leave, Daniel put his backpack on before looking at me. _“So, you wanna meet my friends and I for lunch at third period?”_

I put all my stuff into my book bag. _“Sure,”_ I said. 

_“Cool. How about you meet us by the school fountain then?”_ He asked and I nodded. _“Okay,”_ I said.

_“See you then!”_ He said happily, flashing me that beautiful smile once again before heading to his next class. 

I headed to my next class too, opening up the folded school map from my pocket. As I kept my cool looking for my next class through the crowds of people, I couldn’t stop thinking about the upcoming lunch with Daniel. 

_I never gave this much thought about anyone before, really,_ I remember thinking to myself. _I barely know him and yet there’s something about him I like. If it were anyone else, they probably would have annoyed me._

Even when I got to my next class and sat down, trying to lose myself in my book, my mind couldn’t help but wonder what lunch with Daniel would be like. I couldn't help but wonder what his friends were like, couldn’t help but wonder what _he_ was like. Why would a guy like that, who was probably destined to become popular at school, want anything to do with me? 

_Or maybe he just wants to mess with me and make fun of me with his friends, not the first time in my life where that’s happened to me. Whatever, I guess we’ll soon find out._

* * *

After class finished, I looked on the map to try and find where the school’s fountain was. After locating it, I headed quickly for it, my heart pumping strong inside me and nothing but Daniel taking up the thoughts in my head. 

I finally made it to the school fountain, where him and a group of other good-looking males were gathered. Even so, Daniel stood out to me the most out of all of them. 

I took a deep breath as I walked over, and Daniel immediately stopped talking to his friends and smiled once he saw me. _God, his smile’s gorgeous._

_“Hey, Cody,”_ Daniel called out to me as I walked over to their group. _“Hey,”_ I greeted back. The rest of Daniel’s friends seemed to kind of look me up and down before going back to talking to each other. I didn’t know exactly why they seemed to judge me, but I suspected it was because out of everyone in the group I was the only little white boy there. Not to mention, most of them already were so mature looking for their age—while I basically just started puberty not so long before. 

I basically stood there awkwardly with my book bag around me, rocking my feet back and forth as I just listened to the group speak to each other about subjects I wasn’t familiar with, such as girls, sports, and mainstream music. 

Daniel looked over at me and must have noticed that I wasn’t exactly comfortable, as he interrupted one of the conversations to tell his friends he was going to get some food with me, much to my surprise. 

He pushed himself off from the edge of the fountain before he beckoned me to follow him as we began to walk away from the group. 

_“You got lunch, Cody?”_ He asked me, his voice sounding slightly concerned. I nodded. _“In my bag,”_ I said as he nodded back with a little smile. _“Good. Don’t want you eating the food from the school’s cafeteria, I heard that it’s really not good.”_

_“Noted,”_ I said as the two of us slowly walked across the school’s courtyard. _“Are you thinking of joining any clubs? I’m thinking of trying out for the basketball team,”_ Daniel said as the two of us found an empty bench for us to sit. 

I pulled out my sandwich that my mom prepared for me in a plastic bag from my bookbag, sanitizing my hands before opening it and taking a bite from the sandwich. _“I don’t know. I just like reading.”_

_“I heard the library here is huge. I’m sure you’re bound to find something you like,”_ he said before taking off his backpack, placing it on his lap before unzipping it to pull a thermos out of his lunch bag. _“By the way, I wanna hear about that book you were reading earlier. You seemed really into it. I kinda wanna do more reading myself.”_

_“It’s a love story,”_ I said after chewing and swallowing the food in my mouth. _“It’s about two high school lovers who thought they were gonna be together forever, then they had a bad breakup after graduation. They meet again years later after high school when they’re both adults, but time had already passed and they both have changed since they were together… So it’s complicated.”_

_“I see,”_ Daniel said as he nodded, listening while intensely gazing at me the entire time. _“I didn’t think you’d be the type to be into reading love stories.”_

Somehow my face began to feel warm with slight embarrassment. _“I mean… It’s interesting to me. I like reading about other people’s relationships, I guess.”_

_“You’re a soft guy,”_ Daniel said in a teasing tone as he lightly punched my arm. _“It’s not a bad thing, though. It’s cool. Sometimes I wish my own friends were more like that.”_ I swore my face must have been pink at that point. 

The two just continued to eat in silence for a while before Daniel struck up conversation again. _“Uh… So, what’s your background?”_ He asked. 

I swallowed my food. _“I was born here. My mom is Ukrainian. My dad’s like, a mix of English, Irish, and French, or something like that.”_

Daniel chuckled lightly. _“I hear a lot of that from my friends with white parents too,”_ he said before eating a spoonful of chilli. _“I mean, I shouldn’t really be talking. I’m mixed.”_

_“Oh, yeah?”_

Daniel nodded. _“Mmhmm. My dad is from Jamaica. My mom’s Mexican. I have an older brother and two younger sisters and we all pretty much look the same, at least that’s what people say about us.”_

I slightly smiled. _“Must be fun having lots of siblings. I only have an older brother and he’s kind of a goody-goody, even though he has such annoying friends who just cause trouble.”_

_“Well, my parents are pretty religious, actually. So they plan on having all my siblings and I to go to single-gendered catholic schools. Somehow, they think mixed-gendered schools are nothing but distractions for our education.”_

My eyes widened. _“My parents think the exact same,”_ I said before eating into my sandwich again. _“They want me to be just like my brother, but he’s basically on his way to becoming a pastor.”_

_“Well, what_ do _you want to do?”_ Daniel asked before eating his chilli. 

It took me a good moment to really think about it. What _do_ I want to do? I didn’t like thinking much about the future, I just started high school, after all… 

_“I don’t know. I’ll decide when the time comes, I guess. I just wanna focus on what’s happening right now.”_

_“Respect. I should do the same. Sometimes I worry too much about the future. I should pay attention to what’s already going on.”_

Both of us continued to eat our lunches in peace, the sounds of the slight breeze blowing past my hair feeling somewhat invigorating. Daniel was so easy to talk to, even though I’ve always had trouble with talking to people—but with Daniel, it just felt so natural. 

We continued to eat until we finished our lunches, packing up our things before the bell rang. We both stood up and Daniel turned to me and smiled. _“You’re cool, Cody. We should have lunch together again sometime,”_ he said cheerfully. 

The cool wind blew past us again. I could only nod, looking down to try and hide my face that was most likely blushing. _“Sure.”_

And with that, he held out his fist as an invitation for me to bump my own with his. I raised my fist to lightly bump his before the two of us went our separate ways. 

I couldn’t help but think about him even more as I headed to my next class. _Why would such a perfect guy like that want anything to do with me?_

* * *

After getting off the school bus at the end of the day, I made my way home. I could barely remember how my day went other than lunch with Daniel. 

Once I got to the front door of my house, I unlocked it before announcing my arrival when I entered. I went to greet my mom before turning to leave, but she cleared her throat like she wanted to say something. 

_“How was your first day?”_ She asked.

I shrugged. _“Fine.”_

_“Reminding you that we’ll all be gathering to pray the rosary tonight, okay?”_

_“Okay,”_ I muttered in a somewhat annoyed tone before heading to my room. My family and I lived in a bungalow in an older suburb in the city. It was fine for my parents, my mom being a tailor and my dad being a mechanic, they didn’t seem to ever really talk about upgrading their life or anything like that. 

For me? Well, I had at _least_ wanted to be away from my parents once I got older. I found their whole _‘leave it up to God’_ attitude to get on my nerves sometimes. And waking up early every Sunday morning to get ready before sitting through a church mass.

I closed the door before diving into bed, sighing. I didn’t have a cell phone or anything like that, and the only way I could talk online was when I could use the family computer after I finished my homework. 

Chatting online was a lot easier for me to talk to people since it was so hard for me to talk to people in real life. Chatting was something my parents saw as _‘dangerous,’_ so of course my curious self going through a bit of a rebellious phase was definitely going to secretly do it when they weren’t in the room. 

_I wish I knew Daniel’s email or something,_ I remember thinking to myself. I usually didn’t chat online too much, as I usually would rather read fanfictions while I was on the web instead. But I couldn’t help but really want to talk to Daniel. 

He just couldn’t leave my mind. He was the first person I felt this way about—Someone I really wanted to talk to and hang out with. 

_I guess I’ll just talk to him when I see him at school tomorrow,_ I thought with a smile. 

* * *

The days that followed were as great as the first—better with the more time the both of us spent together. Though I was worried about stealing Daniel away from his friends, he assured me that they were cool. 

Both of us would spend each lunch together talking about ourselves, from the things we liked to do, to things that we liked, and some childhood stories that would make both of us laugh. 

I never opened up that much with anyone before until I met Daniel. No one ever knew so much about me in just the few days we spent together. 

_“So, what about you? What do you plan on doing in the future?”_ I asked him. Daniel leaned back on the bench and sighed with a slight smile. _“Um… That’s hard,”_ he said, taking a moment to think. _“You know, my parents kinda want me to have a successful job and a wife.”_

_“Oh yeah, I forgot to ask you if you have a girlfriend. Obviously she wouldn’t go here.”_

Daniel shook his head. _“No, I don’t. A lot of girls my sisters were friends with would tell me they have a crush on me, but I’m just not really interested in girls. I just don’t really have much in common with them,”_ he said as he stared down at the half-eaten sandwich in his hand. _“I mean, I have more in common with boys than girls, so…”_

_“I know what you mean,”_ I said. I really _did_ understand what he meant, because I felt the same way. Did I really have to marry a _girl_ when I grew up? I just never understood them. Never got the chance to really communicate with them. 

_“But apparently being gay is bad,”_ Daniel said in a sad voice. _“My aunts and uncles always treat them like they’re bad. I remember my dad saying gay people go to hell.”_

_“That’s what my uncle said too,”_ I added. 

Daniel sighed before shaking his head and smiling at me again. _“Well, I’d rather not talk about that anymore. Anyway, my dad said I should become a stockbroker or something. I don’t even know what that is,”_ he said with a little chuckle. 

I leaned back on the bench and shrugged. _“As I said, you don’t really have to know right now. Just focus on what’s happening right now.”_

_“Yeah,”_ Daniel said before taking a bite into his sandwich. I wasn’t very good at comforting people or giving advice—so I just decided to change the subject instead. _“Basketball tryouts are after school.”_

_“Yup, I’m pretty excited. I hope I make the team.”_

_“You will,”_ I said, the first time in my life reassuring someone. _“I know.”_

Daniel laughed. _“Well, I’m glad you believe in me,”_ he said before slapping a hand on my shoulder, making me flinch and suddenly blush at the contact between us.

I cleared my throat. _“Hey, uh, do you have an email or something where maybe we can talk more than just at lunch?”_

_“Oh, yeah! Let me write it down for you,”_ Daniel said before unzipping his backpack, pulling out his notebook and a pen before quickly scribbling down his email address and phone number on a page. He ripped the page and gave it to me and I took it. _“Cool. Thanks.”_

_“No problem,”_ he said with a nod. _“You can email me whenever you want, I’ll be sure to answer it when I can.”_

_“Okay,”_ I said, already planning in my head what I could possibly email to Daniel.

* * *

When I got home from school later that day, I tried to finish all my homework as quick as I could, not caring about whether I put in all my efforts into them or not. 

My parents had finally let me use the family computer after I showed them my work, and I immediately unfolded the piece of paper Daniel gave me earlier. 

Even though his handwriting was messy, I still managed to understand what he wrote down as I typed in his address to search for his profile. His profile photo was of some high top shoes with a vignette filter, typical 2012 teenage boy choice of display photo. 

I added him to my contacts list, my first contact that wasn’t my parents or my brother. I opened up a draft email, thinking about what I could send him. I wasn’t very up-to-date on what were some popular videos on the web, the only thing I could really talk about were books or fanfictions I’ve read. 

I typed out my review for one of my favourite books I read recently. He seemed to be interested in what I had to say about one of the books I was reading on the first day of school, so I hoped that maybe he’d be interested in what I’d have to say about another book. 

After I finished writing the email, I sent it before opening a new tab, ready to browse some fanfictions for the rest of the night. I liked to check up on some of the popular forums to see other people’s new recommendations. 

I heard a ping in the other tab, seeing a new reply from Daniel already, even though it had only been around ten minutes. I opened his email to read it, being greeted by a bunch of smiley faces. In the email he actually responded to some of the things I talked about, and told me about how interesting it sounded. He attached a link to some sort of video he said he liked, and I clicked the link before the video popped up in a new tab. 

It was a clip of a cute dog dancing to some hip hop music. It made me smile and chuckle a little bit. 

I ended up replying to that email and Daniel would reply to it _again_ ten minutes later. We practically spent the entire evening just exchanging emails until my dad had called for me to let me know it was time for dinner. I sent my last email to Daniel saying goodnight before I logged off and cleared the browser history, heading to the dinner table to eat.

Dinner was the same as always, my parents talking about work and praising my brother, Nathan, for his good grades. Nathan was nineteen, and was going to university nearby. He had some questionable friends that he knew since they were in middle school, they were troublemakers and were known for getting suspensions at school—but they were the only people who could stand such a nerd like Nathan, they all played the same video games. 

Nathan mentioned something about wanting to invite them over for the weekend for a sleepover, and of course, my parents said they could. Then they turned the conversation to me and asked when _I’m_ going to make any friends.

_“Actually, I’ve been spending my lunches with someone,”_ I decided to say. It almost irritated me how excited my parents got at that moment. 

_“What’s his name?”_

I slurped up some of the spaghetti from my fork. _“Daniel.”_

_“I see. Well, it’s nice that you made a friend for once. We’re proud of you, Cody. Perhaps we could even meet him sometime.”_

_“Maybe,”_ is all I said before we continued eating and my parents completely changed the subject.

* * *

Over the course of the next few weeks, Daniel and I became closer and closer with the more time that passed, both of us bonding in class and at lunch, eventually we would even hang out sometimes after school and then send emails to each other during the evenings. But the more we hung out, I noticed the more he had been distancing himself from his friends, as we wouldn’t even meet his friends before we hung out and would just eat lunch on our own. When they’d see Daniel they’d greet him as if nothing was wrong, but when I’d pass by them in the hallway or see some of them in my classes, they’d either ignore me or seem hostile towards me. 

I didn’t worry too much over them, though. I only cared about what Daniel thought of me. I had grown so attached to him, always wanting to be by his side. He was so different from anyone I had ever met. It only furthered my curiosity as to why _exactly_ he wanted to hang out with me so much. 

One day, I met Daniel in the bleachers of the football field after he finished basketball practice. He offered me some snacks, asking me if I wanted any because I must have been hungry waiting for him, but I turned it down.

_“I wanted to talk to you,”_ I said. Daniel’s expression turned serious, yet he still looked so handsome even when he didn’t smile. _“Yeah, what’s up? Everything okay?”_

_“Your friends,”_ I said. _“You haven’t been hanging out with them lately.”_

Daniel looked away from me and sighed. _“It’s complicated. I’ve known them since middle school. I’d rather hang out with someone different.”_

I raised a brow curiously. _“But why me? I’m not exactly someone that someone like you would probably want to hang out with.”_

Daniel looked down silently, as if he was thinking hard about his answer. _“You would probably hate me if you knew why.”_

_Huh? What does he mean?_ I thought to myself. _“Is it because you felt sorry for me, so you decided to hang out with me out of pity? Is that why?”_

Daniel looked at me with wide eyes, as if he was shocked I would say that. _“Of course not! I’d never do that to anyone.”_

_“So… Why, then?”_

Daniel seemed to become somewhat flustered, his cheeks blushing red on his dark skin. _“I… I like you, Cody,”_ he said quietly as I felt my heart skip a beat at those words. _“The first time I saw you, I instantly knew I had a crush on you. I thought you were so cute and wanted to get to know you better. You intrigue me so much, Cody. You’re someone who actually listens to me and someone I like listening to. You’re so different from anyone I ever knew.”_

I just blinked, not exactly knowing what to say. Daniel likes _me…_ It was something I never thought would ever happen, but I wish I could have told him that I felt the same—I liked him so much, I never liked someone like this before. _“Daniel…”_

Daniel only brought a hand to my face that was probably blushing pink, leaning in to press his lips against mine. 

I felt my heart beating so quickly from inside my chest—like it would explode. I just sat there still, with Daniel’s lips on mine as I was feeling so overwhelmed at that moment that I just froze and couldn’t do a single thing. I didn’t pull away, I didn’t want to. I just wished that I could have done something in that moment other than sit still like an idiot as the boy I loved kissed me. 

Daniel pulled away, clearly embarrassed. _“I-I’m sorry, Cody… I shouldn’t have done that. I didn’t even give you a chance to speak, I don’t even know if you like guys—”_

_“I like you too,”_ I said as Daniel’s sad expression turned into a happy one, as I got to see that beautiful smile once again. He looked down at himself before taking off his woven bracelet around his wrist. He gently took my arm, putting the bracelet around my own wrist. 

_“I know guys like us aren’t allowed to be boyfriends—so this is all I can give you for now,”_ Daniel said with a smile. _“Maybe one day… When we’re older, maybe we’ll be able to be together.”_

I looked at the bracelet before looking up at him, and I couldn’t help but smile too. 

I think that was the happiest day of my life. I wished I could take that moment, capture it, and keep it forever. 

Because that was the last day I saw Daniel and his beautiful smile.


	2. Part I - Chapter 1: Julian

It was a Friday when Daniel and I confessed our feelings for each other. 

Apparently, some student saw Daniel and I kiss and told someone—and somehow his parents found out. 

Daniel told me that his parents were really religious, so I was pretty worried about what would happen to him. Although it didn’t sound like they were bad people from how Daniel would talk about them, I still knew it probably wouldn’t end well.

I decided to send him an email that evening, asking him if he was okay, but he never ended up replying.

I could barely concentrate on anything the whole weekend thinking about Daniel. Even when Nathan’s annoying friends were over and teasing me whenever I was in the room, I didn’t care. I just worried about Daniel. 

_ “Hey, it’s little sissy Cody,”  _ Kyle, the main member of the group who was always the one causing mischief and was now a party-loving frat boy, called out to me. He always called me that even when we were younger, and I just got used to it because I’d never say anything about it.

I sighed.  _ “What?”  _

Farid snickered, the one who always acted all respectful and sweet to adults but was crude and would say some pretty shocking things when he was with the rest of the group. He was probably the most annoying out of all of them, and he’d say some pretty explicit things about girls he was attracted to.  _ “You wanna hang out with us? We don’t bite. Unless you’re into that.” _

Nathan punched him in the arm.  _ “That’s not funny, that’s my little brother. Sick, man…”  _

_ “You’re right, my bad. I think I’m still high from that sesh Eric and I had earlier.”  _

I rolled my eyes, and so did Nathan. Both my brother and I were pretty straight edge, my brother wasn’t interested in that kind of stuff. At least not from what  _ I’ve  _ seen. 

Eric, the other ‘goody’ one of the group, who was going through his own rebellious phase because of the pressure from his strict asian parents, hit Farid as well.  _ “Y-You don’t have to say it so loud, idiot! What if Nathan’s parents hear!? They’re just down the hall, you know!”  _

_ “We’re nineteen, the age of experimentation. You’ll understand it when you’re older, Cody,” Kyle said. _

_ “Whatever,”  _ I said before leaving the room to go to my own bedroom. Secretly, I hoped Nathan would move out soon so his weird friends didn’t talk to me anymore. 

I laid down on my bed, worrying about how Daniel was doing. I just hoped he was okay.

* * *

Daniel never showed up to class the Monday after the weekend. He didn’t show up to lunch either, and I knew I should have asked his friends—but it’s not like they liked me, and I wasn’t going to lie, they intimidated me. So I didn’t ask. 

But in one of my classes, I overheard some of the students gossiping amongst each other. Talking about how Daniel got pulled out of this school by his parents and how he was going to be sent to some strict catholic boarding school in another city instead. 

I felt like my stomach dropped. I thought I was going to throw up. 

I skipped my next class to hide somewhere just to cry. I never cried over anybody before. Never in my life did I think anyone was worth crying over.

But I cried a lot, just wishing I could be with Daniel again. 

When I got home that day I cried some more, trying not to let my parents or my brother see me and start asking questions. He never replied to my email, and even when I sent another, there was still nothing.

Daniel was gone from my life.

* * *

_ (Four years later)  _

Even though I spent the next few weeks after that mourning for him, I somehow knew it was too good to be true. And so I spent the rest of high school going back to being alone in my own world, just me and some good ol’ reading. 

I knew Daniel’s old friends didn’t like me, they thought I was the reason Daniel was sent away. And they weren’t wrong, it’s the truth. I blamed myself for making Daniel like me. 

But I moved on with life, growing both mentally and physically, and finally ended up graduating high school, getting ready to go away for university in the fall. My parents were nervous about me going to school for the first time with  _ females  _ around, but I assured them that I was solely focused on school itself. I was glad that I was finally getting the chance to be away from my parents and actually do my own thing the way  _ I  _ wanted. 

I won’t forget my parents telling me that they would pray for me daily while I’m away, which means double the prayer they already did for Nathan ever since he moved out to live on his own. I almost felt bad for them.

But here I was, pulled up to the parking lot of the university. It was strange seeing all kinds of different genders mixed on the same campus. I brought my things to my assigned dormitory room. When I got there, there was a girl with light brown hair, freckles scattered across her face, and heavy makeup on hanging up decorations on one side of the room. She looked at me. “‘Sup? You Cody Vale?” 

I nodded. “Yeah,” I said, closing the door behind me. “You are?”

She finished putting up the photo and walked over to me to give me a hand with my things. “Nia Fotia.” 

She helped me settle my things on what would be my side of the room. “I didn’t think I would have a girl roommate.” 

She raised a brow. “Are you afraid of girls or something?” 

I shook my head. “I just never got the chance to ever really talk to any my age. I went to all-boy schools my whole life until now.” 

Nia smiled. I noticed that she had a silver nose ring. “I see, I see. Well, I think it’s cool that mixed gender dormitories are a thing here. Getting kinda tired of the whole segregation of gender in society as a whole.” 

“Yeah,” is all I said in response before I started unpacking my things. “Well, it’s nice to meet you, Cody. What’s your major?” 

“Literature,” I said, putting away my clothes in the closet. “Yours?”

“Computer science.” 

“Cool.” 

Nia checked her phone before she picked up her sweater off the bed and put it on and grabbed her bag. “I gotta get to class. It was nice to meet you, Cody. I’ll see you later, yeah? We should get to know each other more,” she said before heading out.

_ I never talked that much with a girl before. Now I have one as my roommate? This is definitely going to be an interesting experience…  _

* * *

I finished putting away all my clothes and set up my beddings before I got ready for my first class that was in the afternoon. I decided to take some selfies while I was wearing one of my good shirts. The lighting from the window was good too. 

I took a few pictures of myself doing a few different poses and expressions before adding a matching filter for both of them before uploading them up on  _ Flumblr,  _ adding just _ ‘first day’  _ as the caption. 

A few months ago, I actually found out that  _ Flumblr  _ was a popular social media site where you could upload any kind of content and customize your profile and feed to whatever aesthetic you like.

I couldn’t help but want to try it out since a lot of authors and fanfiction writers would post stuff on there, so maybe I could follow them and see what they’re like. But I ended up getting pretty addicted to the site, it was so easy to get to know others with similar interests as my own. I could actually talk directly with people who read the same books as me. 

One day I just decided to take some selfies of myself, then uploaded them just like how some of the other people I follow would do… And surprisingly, it got attention from a lot of people. I mean, I was usually used to getting attention for being so  _ ‘pretty’  _ or whatever, but I wasn’t gonna lie, seeing how much attention I was getting in numbers definitely didn’t feel  _ bad.  _

So I ended up reposting a lot of stuff that fit into a bit of a minimalist pastel aesthetic and decorated my blog to match as well. The more time I spent on the site and the more selfies I uploaded of myself, the more followers I would get. My selfies used to just consist of me doing a random pose or expression and showing off whatever I was doing at that moment, but I actually found myself to be more photogenic than I thought. Must be  _ something  _ about me, or I wouldn’t have so many people following me. I’d even get occasional sexual comments, which was flattering to know that I’ve turned on  _ some  _ people.

Anyways, after I uploaded my new selfies the likes just began rolling in just a few minutes. I just kept refreshing my feed and seeing how many people liked my face. It  _ did  _ make me feel good. 

I exited the  _ Flumblr  _ app before opening up the map of the campus so I could find my class. Good thing the digital map was interactive and my avatar on the screen would move on the map as I moved in real life. 

After finding my way around the campus, I finally made it to building D, which was where my first tuesday class was. 

I decided to sit in the front row, but not in the corner. Being in the middle was fine, and it was easier to see the screen and take notes. 

As I waited for the professor to arrive, I decided to go on my phone and continue one of the ebooks I was reading,  _ Two Princes.  _ Sure, it was considered controversial because of some of its controversial content—but damn, the plot was too  _ juicy.  _ I kept reading, getting lost in the plot, getting myself sunken into the world of the story.

_ Prince Andrew is the kind of person I’d like to be… He’s emotional but still knows how to be rational and not give into temptation. Sure, Prince Virgil might be kind of crazy, but he’s also kind of sexy— _

And suddenly I heard the classroom door open, and I looked up seeing  _ him _ walking in. A handsome and slightly scruffy man—most likely in his mid to late thirties, deep brown hair falling in his face as he pushed up the glasses on his face. He swung around the leather bag he was holding before placing it on top of the table at the front of the room. He was wearing a casual suit with a coat over it, and shoes of leather just like the bag. 

“Ah, so we have someone who actually  _ willingly  _ sits in the front,” he said, in that clear voice of his with a playful smirk in my direction. He had bright hazel eyes. 

I assumed it was because I was one of the only few other people who arrived to class a bit early, and I was the only one sitting in the first two rows. The few others were closer to the back. 

I shrugged. “My eyesight’s not that good. I need to sit closer to see.” 

The man took a sip from his coffee tumbler. “Those big blue eyes of yours can’t see from afar? That’s unfortunate.” 

I know he probably didn’t really mean it more than just a light joke, but something about it made me feel kinda weird inside, in a good way. “Uh… Yeah, no, but you wear glasses, so you probably know what it’s like.” 

The man lightly chuckled. His laugh was…  _ nice.  _ “Yeah, I do. But I actually couldn’t see near  _ or  _ far. My overall eyesight totally sucked. That’s why I hated when the bullies back in middle school would trip me and then run away with my glasses.” 

“That’s awful,” I said with a slightly irritated tone. He just laughed again. “Yeah, but you know how kids are at that age. I’m just thankful it was just stuff like that and nothing worse.” He took a sip of his coffee again. He looked down on his coat and sighed, picking off a clump of hair from it. “My cat… I had already gotten ready this morning and I had a bit of time before leaving, so I played with her a bit…” 

I couldn’t help but smile a bit. “I always wanted a cat.”

He took off his jacket before walking around the table and leaning against it. “You should get one, but only if you can take good care of ‘em. I love my Peggy. She’s a good companion.” 

“You’re a literature professor, I’m sure it’s nice to be reading books with a cat snuggled up to you.” 

He chuckled again. “Oh yeah, for sure. With that late-night coffee in my mug, too,” he said before taking a sip of his coffee again. “What’s your name?” He asked me.

“Cody,” I said. “Yours?” 

He smiled. “Julian Reed-Mannings. But I prefer just Julian,” he said. He looked around the room, seeing more students had come in as the two of us had been talking. I guess both of us were so focused on each other and our conversation that we didn’t notice the room filling up. 

“Guess I better start this lesson,” he said as he checked his watch. He walked around back to set his stuff up for the lecture. I pulled out my laptop to set up to take notes. 

There was chitchat amongst everyone in the room as the room was completely full now. Julian finished setting up everything to get started on the lecture. “Alright, class, welcome to Introduction to Classic Literature,” he said out loud as the class began to quiet down. “And don’t worry, yes, I  _ will  _ be posting these slides online for you all,” he said as a few chuckles came from the students. 

He pulled up his slideshow and began his lecture. He really had such a presence, and the way he spoke was so clear and somewhat eloquent. I could probably sit and listen to him talk about anything. 

I tried to take notes to the best that I could, but I was so easily distracted by Julian. It was easy to understand what he was explaining, but something about him was making my thoughts wander off to somewhere else. 

I just couldn’t stop staring at him the entire lecture that I’d even miss some points that I should have written down. I don’t know what it was about him that had me so nervous all of a sudden. From the moment he stepped into the room, I was already feeling somewhat shy. 

From time to time I’d catch his gaze while he was talking about what he was teaching, but I didn’t think it really  _ meant  _ anything.  _ He has to make eye contact with all the students, right? Maybe It’s just in my head that he’s looking at me more…  _

Secretly, I hoped he was. I hoped he thought I was pretty like everyone else did. 

His jokes and little sarcastic comments he’d make in his lecture genuinely amused me, he really was kind of a funny guy. Handsome, easy to talk to, and funny… What my luck to have such a man like this teaching me. 

_ I just really hope I’ll do well in this class. I want to impress him,  _ I thought to myself as I tried to actually focus on what he was teaching.

* * *

After he finished the lecture, I was somewhat disappointed it was over and I would have to wait until next week to see him.

I waited until the other students left and finished asking him questions before I approached him. He smiled at me. “Cody. What can I do for you?”

_ Ha, well…  _ I cleared my throat. “I, uh, wanted to say that I enjoyed the lecture. I thought the book you assigned to us is truly a classic.”

“Ah, you’ve already read it? Well, I sure hope you don’t spoil it for your fellow peers,” he said with a chuckle. 

“Mmhmm, I just wanted to tell you that I like reading, so I really appreciate courses like this.” 

“Oh? You enjoy reading? I’m glad to hear that. What’s your favourite book?” 

I took a moment to think.  _ That’s a hard one…  _ “I’d say either  _ Darkness Thirty  _ by Elwood Barron, or  _ I, The Jester  _ by Zach Muzak.” 

Julian nodded before pushing up his glasses. “Two very good books, I have read both of them. Both are very different from each other. If you liked  _ Darkness Thirty,  _ I recommend  _ Where to Find Me In Hell  _ by K.C. Dennings.”

“Oh, okay,” I said with a nod. “I’ll check it out.” 

“If you want to, I can lend it to you. I have the special edition. I haven’t read it in a while so it’s pretty much gathering dust on my bookshelf,” he said. I gave him a small smile. “Thank you, that would be great.” 

“For sure. I’ll bring it next week,” he said as he began to put his coat on. “Do you have anything more to ask, Cody?” 

I shook my head, not being able to think of anything more to say, even though I wanted to so badly. “No, that’s all for now. Thank you, sir.”

He chuckled again. “Please, as I said, just Julian is fine,” he said before picking up his bag. “If you have any more questions regarding anything about the course or any of the assignments, don’t hesitate to email me, okay? One of the slides has my email on it.”

“Alright, bye,” I said before heading out. I took a deep breath as I walked out of the building and headed to the nearest vending machine to buy something to drink.

I bought a bottle of lemonade and took a sip to cool myself off. That short conversation with Julian made my heart  _ race.  _ The weird thing was that even though he made me feel nervous, I  _ liked  _ it. It was an exciting kind of nervous. I wanted to experience it again.

And I would by next week, wouldn’t I? 

I decided to head to the library to do some quiet studying. The library was huge and modern, with tons of books and computers all around. I decided to do the homework that we were already assigned, going a bit above and beyond with my answers in hopes to impress Julian. 

After I finished, I headed back to my dorm room for the evening to see Nia with her headphones on (which were loud as hell, even I could hear whatever she was listening to once I entered the room) as she was scrolling through social media on her phone. 

I walked over to my side of the room and took off my bag before sitting on the bed. Once Nia saw me, she took off her headphones before pausing her music. “Yo, Cody.” 

“Hey,” I said, before taking my phone out of my bag and logging onto  _ Flumblr. Wow, my recent selfies did really well. Four hundred and sixty three likes!  _

“How was your first class?” She asked me and I locked my phone before sitting back on my bed. “It was interesting. Yours?” 

“Meh. It was okay,” she said before she did the same. She sighed. “School is hard.”

“It’s only the first day,” I pointed out and she laughed. “Yeah, and it’s already hard.” 

I stared up at the ceiling. I couldn’t help but think about Julian again.  _ Maybe I should shoot him an email and ask him about the next assignment, even though he didn’t even assign it yet…  _

Nia sat up. “Alright, we need to establish some rules for our room,” she said as she punched the air. “‘Cause I got a few I wanna lay down.” 

“Alright. Go ahead.” 

She nodded. “Number one, don’t touch each other without each other’s consent,” she said. “I don’t want you trying to cop a feel when I’m sleeping.” 

I almost wanted to laugh. “You won’t have to worry about that. I don’t swing that way.”

“Still, you said you never really were close to any girls, right? I don’t want you going around being  _ curious  _ and end up sniffing my panties or something.”

“Uhh…” 

“Anyways, number two, no hooking up with people in each other's beds. Use your own.”

“You won’t have to worry about that either,” I said, crossing my arms behind my head. “I’ve never done it.” 

“Aw, that’s cute,” Nia said. “Hopefully you’ll get some soon enough. This is what university’s all about.” 

I only shrugged in response. 

“Rule number three,  _ please _ don’t touch my stuff without asking. I don’t mean this in a rude way, it just drives me nuts when people touch my laptop n’ shit and mess around with it. It’s not a toy.”

“Got it,” I said before rolling up my sleeves. It was a bit hot in the room.

Nia looked over at me, inspecting me. “Cool bracelet,” she said, nodding at me. “You make it yourself?”

My heart nearly sunk at the mention of it. I always wore Daniel’s bracelet on me that sometimes I’d even forget that I was wearing it. 

“No, uh…” I touched the bracelet around my wrist. “An old friend gave it to me.” 

She probably sensed that she had maybe touched a sensitive subject, as she just slowly nodded and changed the subject. “Well, Cody, I’m thinking ‘bout ordering some food before I get started on some gaming. You want anything?”

Thinking about it, I really was actually pretty hungry. “I don’t have any money to pay you back.” 

“It’s cool. It’s on me,” she said. “But you really have  _ nothing?  _ You might want to consider getting a job on campus or something.” 

“Maybe,” I said, taking off my sweater. “If I do, I’ll be sure to pay you back.” 

Nia laughed. “I told you, don’t worry ‘bout that! Consider this a warming welcome meal from your new roommate.” She took her phone and fiddled around with it. “What food do you like?”

“Anything,” I said, and she raised a brow. “I don’t trust people who just say ‘anything’ and then don’t end up liking what I get.”

“I mean it. Anything is fine.”

“Well  _ okay,”  _ she said before finishing ordering on her phone. “Chinese it is.”

She got up and walked over to her desk, opening up her expensive-looking laptop that she most likely used for gaming. “Anyways, this is my baby right here.”

“What do you play?” I asked, not that I really had any knowledge of video games, but I knew that Nathan played a lot. 

“I’m really into RPGs… the  _ Myth of Zelpher  _ is definitely one of my favourites.”

_ Oh, I heard of it before. I'm not sure if Nathan plays it.  _ “Nice,” is all I said. 

“Mmhmm. Hope you don’t mind if I ignore you now,” she said before putting her headphones on and sitting at her desk, opening up one of her games to begin playing.

I decided to scroll through  _ Flumblr  _ and like some posts as Nia continued playing on her laptop while we waited for the food to arrive. When Nia’s phone chimed, she asked me if I could go down to the front of the dorm building to get the food. 

After I went down to get the food and headed back to our room, Nia took a break from her game as the both of us shared dinner and talked while we ate. 

Nia was really chill, and I could really see myself becoming closer with her. I never expected myself to become friends with a girl in real life before, I only really befriended girls through  _ Flumblr.  _ She made me feel that kind of comfort that I felt with Daniel, but less romantic and rather platonic. 

“So, what do you like to do for fun?” Nia asked me after we finished our food and just ended up laying down on our beds and talking. That food sure filled us up good.

“Reading,” I said. “I guess you like gaming, huh?” 

“Yeah, it’s really the only thing I like to do,” she said with a sigh. “I’m just glad I can finally have some freedom out here in university.” 

“Not much at home?”

Nia sighed again. “My dad is just so overprotective of me. He’s always been so strict and shit… He was a captain in the army.” 

“Oh, wow.” 

“Yeah. You can probably guess how that goes.” She said before I thought about my parents and how I used to think they were so strict, but I found that the more I learned about other people’s home lives, the more I felt kind of grateful for my own.  _ Sure, my parents can be kind of annoying religious freaks that got on my nerves sometimes, but they were good parents.  _

“So, just you and your dad?” I asked, trying to be subtle about asking about her mom. 

“Yup. Just us two. My mom died before they could make any more kids,” she said casually. “I was like, seven years old when she died. She was really sick and didn’t tell anybody, didn’t want to hold back my dad from his ambitions in the army.”

“Your dad was that serious about it?” 

“Yeah. Something that has to do with his  _ own  _ dad, I don’t know. I don’t really care,” Nia said. “Anyways, my dad ended up getting discharged anyway a few years ago ‘cause he fucked up his leg.” 

“Is he alright?” 

“Oh, yeah. He just doesn’t serve anymore because of it, which I  _ know  _ he’s still pissed over. Whatever, that’s his problem.” She sat up. “Sorry for talking so much about my life. I forgot to even ask about your own.”

“It’s okay,” I said as I shrugged. “I don’t mind listening.” 

“Tell me about you, Cody,” she said before reaching for the bottle of water on the other side of her bed. 

And so, Nia and I ended up pretty much talking all evening about ourselves, and it felt so natural to talk to her. She was really cool and funny, and it felt like time flew by. I felt happy. I definitely knew Nia was someone I could trust.

We talked all the way until it was late, and we both cleaned up the room before getting ready for bed. I took my towel and my toiletries with me to bring with me to the men’s showers. 

I made it to the men’s showers and entered an empty stall before closing the curtain, hanging up my towel on the wall before getting undressed. Once I was naked, I turned on the water, letting the water wash over my hair and body.

_ Today sure was eventful,  _ I thought to myself.  _ I started university, have a new roommate who’s a female, and met such a dreamy guy who’s my professor…  _

I closed my eyes and let the water come down on my face and neck, letting it run down the rest of my body.  _ Julian Reed-Mannings… There’s something about him that makes me want to know him better.  _

I turned around to let the water run down the back of myself.  _ He made me feel so nervous earlier, but I liked it… I don’t know how to explain it, but I just want to see him again. I don’t know if I can wait until next week. _

I got my body wash and squeezed some into my hand, lathering it with my hands before rubbing it upon my body.  _ He’s so cute, I can’t stop thinking about him…!  _

As I rubbed the body wash on myself, one of my hands began to lead downwards the more I thought about Julian.  _ I… I wouldn’t mind giving my virginity to someone like him…  _

I imagined a scenario in my head that I remember reading in a fanfiction between a male college student and his professor, but instead, I pictured Julian and I. 

_ I’m sitting on top of the desk in the middle of the front row of the classroom, and it’s just Julian and I there. Just the two of us, and he’s telling me how he’s disappointed in me about failing the assignment he had given. _

_ Julian sighs, running a hand through his hair as he leans against the table. “It’s an unfortunate thing to see, Cody. I really know that you can do better than this, I’ve seen how well you’ve done on the homework I always assign.” _

_ I tilt my head down before looking up at him as cute as I can, pouting. “I’m sorry, Julian… Is there any way that I can make up for it?” _

_ Julian thinks for a moment. “I’m afraid I can’t let you redo the assignment, so all I can ask is for you to do better on the next assignments to come.”  _

_ I push myself off from the desk, slowly walking closer to him. “Please, Julian? There must be  _ something  _ I can do to make up for it…” I pretend to take a moment to think before smirking at him, placing a hand on his chest. “Do you think I’m cute?”  _

_ Julian’s eyes widen as he’s slightly taken aback. “Wh-what?”  _

_ “I want to know,” I say, locking my gaze with his gorgeous hazel eyes. “Do you think I’m cute?”  _

_ Julian gulps nervously, his face beginning to redden. “Yeah, you’re very cute, Cody…”  _

I bit my lip and squeezed my dick, gently tugging on it as just imagining Julian saying those words to me. I wanted him to tell me more, tell me how pretty I was, tell me how much he wanted me.

_ I smile at him before sliding my hand down before getting on my knees. My hand lingers on his crotch as he just looks down at me in shock, but he doesn’t stop me. “Maybe I know how I can make up for it,” I say, groping him through his slacks as he softly moans and brings a hand to his face to try and hide his blush. _

_ “Cody…”  _

_ I reach for his belt and begin to undo it, undoing his pants along with it before slowly pulling them down his hips before looking up at him with my innocent blue eyes. “Do you want me, Julian?” I ask, grabbing him through his underwear as he sighs. “You want a pretty boy like me so bad, don’t you?”  _

_ Julian gulps again. “Y-yeah…” He says shakily.  _

_ I pull down the waistband of his underwear before pulling his dick out, imagining it to be around six or seven inches long and circumcised, having a bit of an elegant upwards curve to it. _

_ I stare at it with wide eyes, holding it with a hand. “What do you want me to do with it?” I ask as I look at him, lightly slapping it against my cheek as I could feel it growing harder.  _

_ Julian was shy, and it was really cute to see him like that. “Play with it, stroke it, suck it… Anything you want, Cody…”  _

_ I rub my face against it while opening my mouth, letting my tongue hang out before licking the underside of his dick as he moans out loud, placing a hand on top of my head.  _

I was jerking my hardening cock with my soapy hand, trying my hardest to be quiet as I continued to let the erotic fantasy of Julian and I run through my head while I pleasured myself. 

_ “You like that, huh?” I ask before licking the slit at the head of his cock, tasting the essence of salty precum.  _

_ “Y-yes, wow, Cody…”  _

_ I retract my tongue before spitting on his dick, taking it all in my mouth as I maintain eye contact with him the entire time, getting my mouth down to where my fist was as he leans his head back and moans wantonly.  _

_ I slowly move my head back and forth before popping off of him, spitting on his cock again before moving back in to move my mouth on him faster this time. He grips my hair in his hand, repeatedly whispering out my name as I continue to please him with my mouth, showing him that I was a good boy who deserved good grades.  _

_ I pillow my tongue under his cock while I moved back and forth on him, before popping off of him again, saliva still connecting my wet mouth to his hard cock. “I’m a good boy, aren’t I?” I ask before continuing to jerk his cock, wanting him to cum.  _

_ “Yeah… Good boy…” He manages to breathily let out between pants, his glasses fogging up as I suck his cock and practically worship it with my mouth like the good boy I was.  _

I leaned my back against the shower wall, quietly panting as I hastily continued jerking my hard cock in my hand, feeling myself getting closer to my climax. My heart was beating hard and fast in my chest, and my mind was hazy with lust.

_ Soon, his pants begin to quicken, his face looking completely lost in his pleasure. “C-Cody, I… Nnn…” _

_ “You can cum on my face, Julian… Cum on my cute face…”  _

_ And with that, Julian’s grip on my hair tightens as he sighs my name out loud, shutting his eyes as his cock spurts out hot semen on my face, making me close an eye as it splattered upon my eyelid, my nose, my lips, and even a bit on my neck.  _

_ He lets go of my hair and takes a moment to breathe, tilting my chin up with a finger as he smiles at me, admiring my face with his cum painted upon it. “You look so cute.”  _

“Shit,” I mumbled as I grit my teeth, squeezing my cock as I came, the semen being quickly washed away with the shower water. I took a moment just to calm myself down, letting the water rinse me before turning it colder so I could recover quicker from my orgasm high. 

I never masturbated to the thought of anyone before… I felt some shame in what I had done as I continued on with my shower. 

After I finished showering, I turned off the water and wrapped the towel around my waist before gathering my things and going over to the sink to brush my teeth. After I was done, I returned to my room, the lights already out. Nia was in bed with the covers pulled up, scrolling through social media on her phone. 

She turned her phone off and turned over to face the wall when she saw me return. “You can change, I’m going to sleep. You don’t have to worry about me looking or anything like that.”

“You can look if you want, there’s not much to see,” I said jokingly. 

“I’m good, thanks. Goodnight, Cody,” she said before going to sleep. I got out some clean underwear before putting them on, then getting something comfortable to sleep in. 

I set my alarm for the next day before I climbed into my bed, pulling the covers up before I turned on my side.  _ I can’t believe I really fantasized about Julian and then masturbated to it… What the hell is wrong with me!  _

It wasn’t like I never masturbated before—I had done it many times after an explicit fanfiction got me hard—but I never did it to an actual  _ person  _ before… It was new to me, and I thought it was weird, too. 

_ Why the hell am I so fixated on Julian? Out of all the people I could have liked… It had to be my own literature professor.  _

I decided to just try and sleep to get my mind off of it and him for the moment, but I wished that I knew what exactly that innocent crush would lead to. 

If only I knew. 


	3. Part I - Chapter 2: Julian

The rest of the week seemed to drag on. The rest of my classes were average, nothing really special or worth even mentioning. The only things I’ve been doing to pass the time during the week was studying for my classes, hanging out with Nia, and daydreaming about Julian… 

It was so strange. This man I only just met had been occupying my thoughts so much. I couldn’t help but want to see him, want to learn about him, want to be beside him. I secretly wished that maybe he was thinking the same about me, but that was probably just wishful thinking.  _ He probably has hundreds of students, I’m sure he doesn’t even remember me…  _

The first weekend at school rolled around, and I had already finished all my homework for my classes, so there wasn’t anything I planned to do. Nia must have known that as well, as every time she would leave our room and come back, she’d be surprised to see me still in bed on my phone or on my laptop. She suggested that I should at least go out for a walk and check out some stuff either on or off campus.

And so I decided  _ why the hell not,  _ as I could always go back to mindlessly browsing the web some other time. I got ready before heading out, walking down the pathways of the campus. Nothing really stood out to me worth checking out, and I felt like I would rather be comfortable in bed reading. 

I soon walked off campus, crossing the street to walk down to the town that was closeby, which was an old downtown area with plenty of shops and apartment buildings. Even though I was a bit curious to check out some of the shops, I only had a bit of money to afford essential things.

I was beginning to feel a bit hungry, so I headed into the closest cafe to hopefully get something cheap to eat. 

I entered the cafe, the interior design of the establishment looking very fresh and modern with plenty of plants decorated along the walls and hanging from the ceiling. I lined up to order, squinting my eyes to try and read what the menu was from afar. 

Before I knew it, it was my turn to order. “Uh…” I looked up at the menu board, tapping my chin in thought. “I’ll have the salad meal, I guess. With water to drink.” 

“Alright,” the cashier said. “That’ll be eleven dollars and ninety-nine cents.” 

_ Damn, the price of meals nowadays have really gone up,  _ I thought to myself as I reached for my wallet in my pocket. I counted up the money that I had before realizing I was a dollar short.  _ Shit.  _

I sighed heavily before shaking my head. “Um, I actually don’t have eno—”

“It’s on me,” a familiar voice behind me said. I looked behind me and widened my eyes seeing the handsome man standing there with a smile.  _ Julian.  _

I stepped aside awkwardly as Julian paid for my meal before paying for his own. “Hello, Cody. Spending the weekend off campus?” 

“Y-yeah,” I said, suddenly feeling shy. “What are you doing here?” I asked, but the answer was blatantly obvious—he was getting food, like me.

Thankfully, he chuckled. “I actually live in an apartment in this neighbourhood. I come here every Sunday. This is my favourite cafe in town,” he said before the server gave us our orders. “Would you like to join me?” He asked as he gestured towards an empty table, and of course I couldn’t turn it down.

We sat together and I felt my heart beating faster in my chest, feeling so fidgety all of a sudden. “How have you been liking university so far, Cody?” Julian asked me before taking a sip of his coffee. I could see now that Julian drank his coffee black. 

I poked at my salad before taking a bite. “It’s okay,” I said as I chewed and swallowed. 

“Any classes that you like so far?” He asked me before taking a bite from his sandwich. I shrugged. “It’s a bit early to tell, but… I like your class,” I said shyly, hoping he didn’t think I was trying to be a suck-up, because I genuinely meant it.

Julian smiled. “Thank you, I’m flattered. I hope you stay for the rest of the course,” he said. “Some students find that my assignments can be a bit too challenging for them.” 

“Oh, yeah?” I responded before taking a sip of my water. “Well, it’s just an introduction course, isn’t it? It can’t be that hard.” 

“I hope you won’t underestimate me, Cody. My colleagues tell me I can be a hard-ass when I need to be,” he said with a chuckle. “I just want you to work hard, and I can definitely see you have been from your homework answers.” 

“You already read them?” 

He nodded. “I did. I’m very impressed. If you keep it up just like that, I’m sure you’ll pass the class with flying colours,” he said with a smile, making me smile back. 

We continued to eat before I decided that I should maybe initiate some more smalltalk, even as shy and nervous as I felt. “So, it’s just you and your cat living downtown? You’re not married?” I asked. 

Julian nodded before chuckling and slightly blushing, scratching the back of his neck. “No, it’s just the two of us. Even though I’m reaching my forties soon… It’s quite a cozy life, just Peggy and I,” he said. “I’m happy with my job as well, although I definitely wouldn’t turn down teaching somewhere like  _ Seacoast  _ or  _ Fortuna. _ ” 

_ Those are two really prestigious schools in the country,  _ I thought to myself. “I’m glad you’re teaching here, though.” 

“Thank you, Cody. I appreciate that,” he said with a little smile as he pushed up his glasses. 

The two of us continued to eat and talk about some casual subjects, such as the school, some books that we’ve read, and a few questions about each other’s lives that weren’t too personal. 

It felt once again like it was just the two of us in our own world. I felt that I had become much more relaxed the more the two of us talked, but I still felt a bit self-conscious as to how I looked and what I’d say, I just really wanted to impress him. 

He checked his watch before standing up, collecting his garbage and mine as well. “I apologize, Cody, but I have to get going. It was nice having lunch with you, don’t worry about paying me back or anything,” he said with a little smile. “Keep up the good work, okay? I’ll see you in class tomorrow, hopefully.” 

I nodded. “Okay.” 

He went to go throw out our garbage before waving goodbye to me again, heading out. I exhaled deeply, closing my eyes to try and process what just happened.  _ Jeez, I swear this dumb crush on Julian will be the death of me. I feel like both my head and body get so overwhelmed when I’m around him…  _

After taking a few minutes to calm myself down, I decided to head out of the cafe and back to campus. Once I got to the dorm building, I went straight to my room before laying down on my bed to see what was happening on  _ Flumblr.  _

I was pretty satisfied with the number of followers I had lately—every time I made a post with my face in it, I seemed to get so many likes and new follows.

Sometimes I wondered if my  _ ‘pretty face’  _ would ever take me anywhere in life other than getting attention from random strangers. 

_ I wonder if Julian likes my pretty face,  _ I thought to myself. I was so excited to see him in class the next day, and to read that book he said he would lend to me. 

_ Until tomorrow…  _ I thought to myself before closing my eyes to drift off into a nap.

* * *

I made sure to wear one of my nicer shirts before I went to my Monday class. I made sure to get there early like last time, sitting in my usual spot, in the front right in the centre. 

A lot more students were coming inside the classroom to take their seats, which made me curse to myself that Julian and I wouldn’t be able to have a conversation before class started. 

Two girls possibly the same age as me walked in together, sitting in the row behind me. “Don’t you think our prof for this class is hot?” 

“For sure. But he’s probably got a wife, or something… Shoot. I would totally let him get it,” the other girl said to her friend before the two giggled. 

_ Little do they know his only female companion is his cat,  _ I thought to myself. 

The door opened and Julian walked in, making me sit up immediately. He was always dressed so fashionably whenever I saw him. 

“Hello, everybody. I hope you all had a good weekend,” he said to the room before looking at me with a small smile. I immediately looked down shyly. 

He began to set up for the day’s lecture, and I pulled out my laptop to get ready to take notes. After he was finished setting up, he went over the homework.

“Now, I wanted to say thank you to those who actually did the homework,” he said slightly teasingly. “Special thanks to Cody over here for going above and beyond with his answers.” 

I widened my eyes and looked up, seeing Julian change slides to show a screenshot of my answers for the homework. “This is truly the gold standard. Exactly what I’d like to see,” he said as he read out my answers.

I couldn’t help but feel bashful and shy having him praise me so much. It made me feel good… 

After he finished using my answers to take up the homework questions, he moved on to the lecture as I tried my best to take notes without getting distracted by how handsome Julian was.  _ God, I love the way he looks, the way he talks, the way he’s just so passionate about literature…  _

Time just seemed to fly by, and before I knew it, the lecture was over. The students began to leave the class, except for me, of course.

“There he is, Mr. Gold Star. What’s happening, Cody?” Julian asked me as he began to put away his things.

I shyly pulled my sleeves up to cover my hands. “I… wanted to say thank you,” I said, suddenly feeling nervous again. “For both praising me for my answers and for paying for my lunch yesterday.” 

“Ah, don’t even mention it, Cody. I just wanted to show the class what a prime example of what I’m looking for is,” he said with a smile. “And as I said, don’t worry about lunch! It was on me.” 

I nodded. “Okay,” I said before it seemed that he suddenly remembered something. He grabbed his bag and pulled out a book, presenting it to me. “Here, as I promised,  _ Where to Find Me In Hell.  _ Just return it to me when you’re finished reading it.” 

I took it from him, feeling butterflies in my stomach when our hands touched. “Thank you. What if I don’t finish it before the semester’s over?” 

“Then you can keep it, I don’t mind. I’d be fine knowing that it’s in good hands,” he said as he smiled again. 

_ God, I swear I could melt,  _ I thought to myself before I put the book in my bag. “Well… I’ll see you next week,” I said to him before he nodded. “Sure thing, Cody. Good job again on the homework, I hope you can deliver that kind of effort into this week’s as well.” 

“I hope so too,” I said to him before waving goodbye again and leaving. 

I closed my eyes and exhaled deeply after leaving the classroom, feeling my heart racing once again.

* * *

The next few weeks that passed by, I spent all my time focusing on putting all my effort into the homework and assignments for Julian’s class, and reading the book that he lent me. Nia had been teasing me about how much I had my nose in a book or my eyes glued to my computer screen (not that she was much better, she was always gaming on her laptop whenever I came back after classes). 

I was doing alright in my other classes, but most of my energy went towards impressing Julian in any way. Every week he would praise me in front of everyone for my efforts and we would have a short conversation after class. 

I would even email him questions about the homework that he’d assign or about something he had taught us in class, and he would respond happily and professionally. Even though I was glad that he responded to my emails, it was a bit frustrating having this wall between us that was preventing us from communicating other than in a student-teacher way. 

The story of  _ Where to Find Me In Hell  _ was about the journey of a young man named Samuel whose goal in life is to become an angel and reunite with his childhood love in heaven, but to do so, he must not fall into the temptations of sin. 

The book was interesting so far that I’ve read, but I found that it was somewhat dumb for Samuel to have to live such a pure and squeaky clean life free of any kind of sin just to see some girl he knew when he was a kid.  _ How boring is that? I wouldn’t be able to do it. _

Then I remembered Daniel, and wondered if I’d be willing to live such an innocent life if it meant I’d get to see him again. I looked down at his bracelet around my wrist, suddenly feeling so empty.

I shook my head.  _ It’s been four years. It’s over,  _ I told myself. 

I decided to try and not think about  _ what ifs  _ and all that, it would just cause unnecessary pain for myself. So I decided to read on, thinking about why Julian liked this book so much. 

_ I wonder if Julian is innocent,  _ I wondered as I flipped the page.  _ I wonder if he’s as pure as he makes himself seem to be? Or does he have some secrets…?  _

I decided not to think too much about it, not wanting to ruin the idealized version of Julian I already had in my mind. 

* * *

After about a month of being the ‘prime example’ of a gold standard student, Julian gave us a different kind of assignment that was about something he talked about in the lecture. It was actually something I didn’t understand very well both when he explained it in class and in the written instructions, so I decided to ask him about it after the class when he assigned it. 

“I didn’t really understand the lecture today,” I said to him with a bit of shame. “I was kinda thrown off with the topic.” 

“Oh? That surprises me, considering how well you’ve done on all the homework and the other assignment,” Julian said. “But don’t worry, Cody. I’ll do my best to make sure you’ll succeed in this assignment and this course.” 

“Thank you,” I said as he checked his schedule book. “Hmm… I don’t have time to go over it right now, as I have a meeting I have to get to, but how about we meet sometime this week and we can go over it together?” 

_ Imagining the two of us together… Sitting beside him as he explains the assignment to me…  _ I looked down to try and hide my growing blush. “Sure.” 

“Alright. How about on Friday at around noon we meet at that cafe from before where we had lunch together? Does that sound good to you?” He asked me, and I nodded. “Okay.”

“Cool. I’ll see you then, Cody,” he said to me with a smile before picking up his bag and heading out in a hurry to get to his meeting. 

I gulped as I tried not to freak out too much.  _ Spending time out of school with Julian again… I can’t wait.  _

I shook my head and sighed, slapping a hand to my forehead.  _ What’s important is that I do good in this class, right? And not just about spending time with Julian? _

I didn’t know why, but I felt something inside me regarding later that week with Julian. I didn’t know what it was, but somehow I had a feeling that something would happen… 

...And how right I was. 

* * *

I had read further in the book Julian lent me, and the plot had sure taken a turn. It turned out Samuel fell in love with a tempting woman who was a disguised demon from hell. And so even though Samuel falls for her, he gets a second chance to decide whether to continue his pursuit of an innocent life for the girl he loves in heaven, or to continue to stay with the devil woman, who fulfilled his every need.

That’s where I stopped reading and took a break when Friday rolled around. I prepared myself that day by waking up early to shower and pick out the right outfit that maybe Julian thought was somewhat stylish. I wish I was more fashionable, but I didn’t really have the money or the confidence to improve my wardrobe. I mostly just wore Nathan’s hand-me-downs.

At least my  _ Flumblr  _ followers didn’t seem to mind my style. I could post pictures of me wearing a potato sack and still get likes. 

So I picked a red hoodie and some jeans, I felt that a simple look like this was working for me. Nia was staying in to play games, and she teased me about looking nice for a  _ date.  _

I brought my school bag with me as I made my way out of the dorms and off the campus to the cafe that was downtown. I wanted to get there early, just like how I always showed up early for his class. When I arrived, it seemed that the cafe was flooded with customers already, so I decided to just stand by the door to wait for Julian. It wasn’t cold outside or anything, so I didn’t mind waiting. 

After about ten minutes, I saw Julian jogging over to me, his bag around him as he smiled. “Cody, it’s good to see you. Are you ready?” 

I gestured to the cafe with my thumb. “It’s full.” 

Julian turned to look inside through the clear glass windows of the cafe, sighing. “Shoot, you’re right… It’s packed in there,” he said frustratedly. He looked at me. “How about we go to my apartment instead? It’s close by,” he suggested. 

I gulped.  _ Julian and I, alone in his apartment…? I mean, other than his cat…  _ “Okay,” I said with a nod. 

“Alright. We can walk there from here, so just follow my lead,” Julian said with a smile before he turned, leading the way as I followed. 

It was a pretty short walk to get to his apartment building, not even ten minutes away from the cafe. Julian used his key to enter the building before the two of us entered, heading up the stairs to the third floor of the building where Julian’s apartment was. 

My heart was beating strong and fast inside me the whole time as we walked down the hall.  _ I really can’t believe I’m going to Julian’s apartment…  _

The two of us made it to his door and he unlocked it before letting me inside. I stepped in as he followed and closed the door behind him. “Welcome to my place,” he said as he took off his coat and shoes. He was wearing a button-down shirt with the sleeves rolled up, showing off his elegant-looking watch around his wrist.

I took a moment to admire his place. It was small, but it was cozy. It was a bit cluttered around but in a way that was still somewhat working for its environment. There seemed to be books all over the place, not to mention a large bookshelf taking up the entire wall of the living area. Cat toys were around as well. From the hallway came Julian’s cute striped cat making her way to check us out. 

“Hey, Peggy,” Julian greeted as he picked up the feline into his arms and snuggled her before putting her down to let her go and do her own thing. 

“She’s cute,” I said and Julian nodded. “Indeed. She’s a smart girl, too.” He smiled as he watched her climb on her tower to settle down on the top. 

“Well, you can go sit down on the couch and set up, Cody. I’ll make us some coffee so you can show me everything you don’t understand,” he said as he gestured towards the couch in the living area, and I nodded as I took my shoes off before heading over to the couch to sit down and pull my things out of my bag. 

Peggy was staring at me the whole time, and it made me feel slightly uneasy. 

I moved over some of the books and newspapers that were on the coffee table to make room for my laptop and the coffee Julian was making. I logged onto the website where Julian posted the slides for each week before sitting back and staring back at Peggy. 

Her eyes were a greenish-copper, almost alike to Julian’s. 

“Do you like anything in your coffee, Cody?” Julian asked from the kitchen. I didn’t usually drink coffee unless it was really sweet and had a lot of milk, but I didn’t want Julian to know that. “No, just black is okay,” I replied. 

“Nice,” Julian said before he arrived in the living area with two mugs filled with dark black coffee. He brought them over to the coffee table and handed one mug to me before I took it, our fingers grazing again as I felt that same spark from before. 

He sat down next to me on the couch, making my heart begin to race even quicker.  _ I can’t believe I’m really sitting next to Julian on his couch in his apartment,  _ I thought to myself as Julian began to explain the subject to me. But I just stared at him, we’ve never been so close before. 

He moved closer to click to go to the next slide, explaining the points on it to me as well. I wasn’t really listening, I could hear him talk but I wasn’t quite understanding the words. I could smell the scent of his cologne, so classy yet subtle, just like Julian. 

I blinked, trying to snap out of my daze and concentrate on what he was actually trying to teach me. I looked away and sighed. I just couldn’t get myself to calm down.

“What’s the matter, Cody? Are you alright?” Julian asked me, genuine concern in his voice. I slowly nodded before sighing again. “I just… Keep getting distracted. My mind always drifts off into other things when I try to focus.”

“Is there something on your mind?” He asked me gently, as if he was actually worried about me. I nodded. “Yeah, but I don’t want to stray away from this,” I said, gesturing to the lesson slides on my laptop screen.

Julian shook his head. “It’s difficult to absorb the information you’re being taught when you have a lot going on up here,” he said as he gestured to his head. “If you don’t want to talk about it, that’s fine. I just hope that there’s something I can do to help.” 

I noticed at the moment that our legs were touching each other, which was obviously accidental—but it made my heart feel aflutter. 

I gulped before looking at him. “I… I really like someone, but I shouldn’t…” 

“I see,” Julian said before pushing up his glasses with two fingers. “Well, you can’t really help how you feel about someone, that’s the truth,” he said with a light chuckle. “I’d say to just follow your heart. If it feels right, go for it. And if it doesn’t, then it wasn’t meant to be. That’s the best advice I can give.” 

“Samuel,” I said silently under my breath. 

“H-huh?” 

I looked at him. “In  _ Where to Find Me In Hell,  _ Samuel has to live an innocent life in order to reunite with the girl he loves,” I said. “But he falls for the demon woman and has to choose between these two women he loves. What do you think of that?” 

“Well…” Julian seemed to think for a moment. “I think I’m a lot like Samuel in the sense that he wants to live a life as pure as he can to be granted with the greatest reward of all. But, I understand how powerful temptation can be, especially when you’re being tempted by someone who seems to be perfect. For me personally, if I were in Samuel’s shoes, I would try my best to live life as well as I can to be rewarded in the afterlife.” 

I shook my head. “Would you ever consider giving into your own temptations?” I asked, staring into his beautiful hazel eyes for an answer.

“Er… Well…” Julian sheepishly scratched his head. “...I never really considered it.” 

“Then I hope you can forgive me for giving into mine,” I quietly said. Before I could give Julian a chance to answer, I leaned in and closed my eyes as I pressed my lips against his own, making him tense up in surprise, but he didn’t pull away or push me back. 

His lips were soft with balm, and he tasted like coffee… 

After a few seconds, Julian gently pulled back and shook his head. “Cody…” 

“I like you so much, Julian,” I finally said out loud, desperately gripping one of his shoulders with a hand. “I can’t stop thinking about you, day and night, it’s always you on my mind… I feel like my chest is going to explode whenever you’re around. I… I want to be yours, only yours…” My voice trailed off as I looked down, my face probably red.

“I’m your teacher, and you’re my student…” Julian quietly said in a calm voice, despite probably freaking out on the inside. “This wouldn’t be right.”

“But do you like me too, Julian?” I asked him, looking up, my big blue eyes about to tear up. 

Julian began to blush as he pushed up his glasses, looking away. “I… I admit, I find you incredibly fascinating, Cody. You’re remarkably beautiful, incredibly smart, and we’re passionate about the same things… You would be perfect for me…” He sighed. “But it’s not appropriate. We could get in a lot of trouble if someone found out.” 

I just looked down, feeling like I was going to cry any time soon.  _ He really thinks that about me?  _ “Nobody will know,” I said. “I promise, no one will know. I… I just want to be with you so badly.” I leaned my head against his chest, feeling a tear roll down my cheek. 

Julian took a moment to calm down and exhaled deeply, taking my shoulders and gently moving me off of him. “...Alright.” 

I looked up. “Huh?” 

Julian closed his eyes and took another deep breath. “I like you too, Cody. I want us to be together,” he said to me, making me widen my eyes. “However, it will be  _ only _ in private. We can’t ever get caught. Anywhere in public, we are strictly  _ teacher  _ and  _ student. _ Okay?” He wiped my tears with his thumb and smiled at me. “So, no more crying,” he said softly. 

I was completely speechless at that point, and so Julian moved his hand down my face to tilt my head up, pressing his lips against mine as he kissed me, making me close my eyes and smile as I kissed him back.

_ God,  _ I could feel fireworks going off when we kissed—all throughout my body were sparks of joy going off. Kissing him felt as good as I imagined it would be. Butterflies were fluttering about in my chest and my stomach, and I felt that nothing,  _ nothing  _ in the world could bring me down.

Because Julian was mine. And I was his.

We continued to kiss as I pulled him closer to deepen the kiss as he sighed into my mouth, making me happily catch every sigh and moan with my own lips. He tasted so good, kissing him felt so  _ right,  _ and my mind was completely somewhere else yet only focused on this moment alone. 

I shifted myself to climb on his lap, and he let me as his hands gripped my hips as his lips moved to kiss their way from my lips down my neck, gently biting into my skin and sucking as I softly gasped. The slight pain was replaced with a soft kiss there—he had marked me.  _ I belonged to him.  _

I could feel blood start rushing down below, beginning to get me aroused. Julian peppered kisses all over my neck, a hand moving down as I felt him softly grab at my ass, making me slightly whimper.  _ Julian likes me… I’m Julian’s secret boyfriend…  _

Our lips connected again and we passionately made out again, as I grinded on his lap while his tongue slipped into my mouth, making me moan as I felt his tongue play with my own, our kisses becoming messy and fervent. I was  _ melting  _ in his grasp. 

He gently pulled away as we caught our breaths before he looked at me with a lustful gaze, cupping my face in his hand. “You’re so beautiful, Cody…” He whispered before smiling at me. “But, really, we really need you to understand this material,” he said with a knowing look as I was still sitting in his lap. 

I sighed. “Okay, you’re right,” I said before climbing off of him to sit back down on the couch, still feeling half-hard in my pants. As Julian went back to teacher mode, I just tried to ignore my hardness and hoped that it would go away. 

I actually did end up listening to Julian explain the material to me, the terms in the lesson and instructions of the assignment making a lot more sense after he clarified them. I truly did want to do well in this class, especially for Julian. 

After we finished studying together and Julian made sure that I understood everything, we just drank coffee and talked about novels we liked and about ourselves until it was pretty late. 

“It’s late, Cody. You should head back,” Julian said and I nodded. “Alright,” I said as I began to pack up my things, with Julian helping me. 

I stood up and grabbed my bag before Julian walked me down to the front of his apartment building. “Thank you, Julian…” I said. “...For everything.” 

He smiled. “I just hope you understand what I’m looking for in the assignment now,” he said and I nodded. “Yes. I get it, I’ll start working on it tomorrow.”

“Good boy,” Julian said casually, although hearing him call me that suddenly made me feel somewhat flustered. “Goodnight, Cody.” 

“Goodnight, Julian,” I said, wanting to kiss him, but not when we were out like this where people might see. 

“Do you want me to call you a ride?” He asked me. “It’s pretty dark.”

I shook my head. “No, I’ll be okay.”

“Are you sure?” He asked, a look of worry on his face.

“Yes. I’ll be fine.”

“Alright. Be safe walking back,” he said to me as he began to walk back inside and I nodded before I began walking back to campus. I couldn’t help but think about what had happened this whole evening.

_ Julian and I are finally together… It feels like a dream…!  _

I didn’t mind having to keep our relationship totally secret and having just a regular relationship at school. Maybe it was wrong, but I didn’t care. 

Thankfully, I made it back to my dorm building safely in one piece, and Nia was still on her laptop playing games. She took off her headphones and looked at me with a smirk when she saw me come in. “How was your date?” 

I rolled my eyes in response before walking over to my bed to lay down and sigh dreamily, thinking about Julian. 

_ We really kissed… And I’m really Julian’s boyfriend…  _ I felt like I was floating on air.

_ I’m his… And he’s mine. _


	4. Part I - Chapter 3: Julian

The time I spent with Julian felt surreal.

After we kissed for the first time and revealed our feelings for each other, we exchanged phone numbers so that we could talk anytime. 

Since we could only really see each other romantically in private, I would come over to his apartment on Fridays and then stay over until Sunday morning. He would cook dinner for the two of us on Friday and we’d talk while eating together, and while he would spend Saturdays marking assignments and researching for work, I’d sit on his couch and read or study while drinking coffee. I actually started liking black coffee.

Peggy seemed to start warming up to me, or at least I _hoped_ so. She would sit next to me whenever I was on Julian’s couch, just sitting there and watching me. I wonder if she was studying me in a good way or if maybe she was jealous that I was spending so much time with her owner.

I was actually doing very well in Julian’s class, as he would always make sure that I understood the course content. Even when I insisted that I understood the lecture, he’d go over it with me again, just to really make sure. It was a bit frustrating sometimes, as I’d rather be kissing him than having him tutor me, but I was still grateful nonetheless. He never gave me any special treatment in class, I was earning my good grades all on my own.

Nia was a bit curious as to who my _‘boyfriend’_ was. She wasn’t the type to snoop, but sometimes she’d ask too many questions that I couldn’t answer. 

“So, does he go here?” She one day asked me when we were out eating lunch together. 

“Um…” I took a bite of my food. “Yeah. He does.” _He technically does…_

She raised her brows. “Oh, yeah? What program is he in?”

I nervously poked around at my food with my plastic fork. “Same as mine.” 

“Ah, cool… Having a boyfriend going to the same university as you must be awesome,” she said with a smile as all I could do was slowly nod before taking another bite of my food and changing the subject. 

My parents would check up on me from time to time, calling me on my phone every so often to ask about how I was doing. I wasn’t going to tell them about Julian, absolutely _not._ They would probably start worrying about me knowing I have a female as my roommate, so I’d just tell them that I was studying hard and focusing on my classes, which was kind of the truth. Kind of.

Meanwhile, Nathan was attending grad school in the city, and sometimes we’d talk, but not too much. I guess I’m at that age where I’d prefer _not_ to see my brother. 

Life definitely wasn’t bad, especially because I had Julian… Living my own life for once felt _great._

* * *

I was sitting on Julian’s couch, continuing to read _Where to Find Me In Hell_. The story had continued on Samuel’s journey and how he was slowly losing sight of his goal to reach heaven, as he was too busy giving into the temptations of the demon. She gave him everything he needed on earth, so why _wouldn’t_ he stay with her? 

Julian finally finished grading for the day and walked over to me, kissing my forehead gently before he sat down next to me. “Come here,” he softly said as he beckoned me over to sit closer to him.

I laid my head down in his lap and stretched my legs out on the couch, smiling at him as he smiled back, stroking my hair with his hand. “You’re gorgeous, Cody. God, you’re perfect.”

I couldn’t help but blush as I reached up and pressed a hand to his cheek, feeling his stubble slightly scratch against my palm. “You’re the one who’s perfect. I’m so lucky to have you, Julian…” 

He placed his other hand over mine and stroked it softly with his thumb as we spent a quiet moment just gazing at each other. It was all so perfect, until we were interrupted by a loud meow from Peggy. 

We both looked over at her, who was begging for some attention. I sat up and let Julian go and deal with her as I sighed. _I really wonder if that cat hates me or something… Oh well._

I watched as Julian gave her the attention that she wanted, rubbing her belly and laughing as the cat purred in satisfaction. I couldn’t help but smile seeing how much Julian cared for her. He was gentle and playful, and it reminded me of how he was with me when we were alone. 

I blushed and felt my heart flutter thinking about how gentle and caring Julian was whenever we’d kiss, he was such a gentleman. 

Once Peggy was satisfied, she wandered off somewhere else as Julian sat next to me and took my hand, gently kissing the back of it as I smiled. “Sorry about that, Cody.”

I shook my head. “It’s fine,” I said. He pulled me in and I wrapped my arms around him, our foreheads touching as I bit my lip and stared into his gorgeous hazel eyes.

“Where were we?” He asked before I leaned in to kiss him, feeling his soft lips against my own as I inhaled the scent of his cologne on him. He smelled so good and _tasted_ even better, the taste of coffee always lingering on him. 

His hands gripped my hips, pulling me onto his lap as I grinded down against him, continuing to kiss him as we happily made out. I parted my lips and let Julian explore my mouth deeper. I was never tired of the way Julian felt, just being able to kiss him made me feel like I was high. It made me wonder how much more he’d make me feel if we took things even further… 

The thought of Julian on top of me, taking my virginity on his bed, his face flushed as he loses himself in his pleasure while he’s inside me, fucking my brains out… It was getting me so damn aroused. 

“Cody,” Julian murmured against my lips, making me slightly pull away as saliva still connected our mouths, making me wipe my mouth with my sleeve. “Yeah?” 

Julian’s hand lightly grazed at my crotch, making me blush. “I’m getting you excited, huh?” He asked, palming at my hardening dick as I couldn’t help but let out a small whimper. “Mmm, yeah…” 

“Would you like me to take care of it?” He asked, looking at me with a caring yet _hungry_ look in his eyes. I gulped before nodding, feeling my face blush even deeper.

My hands were slightly shaking with nervous excitement as Julian helped me undo my jeans, pulling them lower on my hips. I pushed down the waistband of my white trunks, pulling out my hard cock as Julian sighed and licked his lips at the sight of my cock. I felt so shy being exposed—but I liked being admired by Julian like this.

“It’s very pretty, Cody… Like you,” he mumbled, wrapping a hand around it and giving it a light squeeze as I slightly whimpered, earning a soft chuckle from Julian. “So cute.” 

He had one hand placed on my lower back to hold me steady on his lap as his other hand played with my dick, squeezing, tugging, stroking me to get me harder as all I could do was hold onto his shoulder with one hand while my other hand had my sweater sleeve pulled over it as I tried to hide my blushing face. I was a whimpering, flustered mess, but it seemed to amuse Julian. 

“Gorgeous,” he whispered as he spat on the palm of his hand before stroking me again, running his thumb over the slit as I slightly twitched in pleasure, pre-cum leaking as I felt a bit embarrassed to be like this, but Julian just continued to whisper sweet nothings to me, stroking my cock faster as I could feel myself quickly getting closer and closer to my climax even though he only had been pleasing me for several minutes. 

“You never had anyone touch you like this before?” Julian asked me, and I shook my head shyly as he smirked. “I can tell, you’re already so hard, so ready to burst already. Such an innocent boy who’s so eager to get off,” he said, continuing to give me pleasure with his hand as I was panting, my heart beating quickly in my chest. 

“J-Julian… Nnn…” I whined softly as he smiled at me. “Yeah? What is it, Cody?” He asked, stroking me faster, encouraging me to orgasm for him. 

“I-I…” I couldn’t even finish what I was going to say, moaning as I shut my eyes and felt my cock suddenly spurt out cum, Julian watching in fascination as my semen spilled onto his hand that was around my cock. 

I took a good moment to calm myself down and catch my breath as Julian smiled at me, pressing his lips against my neck to leave a kiss. “So beautiful,” he murmured into my skin before he reached into his jacket pocket with his clean hand to pull out a handkerchief, wiping his hand and my now soft cock as I only blushed and let him clean me. 

“Julian,” I softly whispered and he looked at me. “Yes?” 

I couldn’t help but smile, gazing into those stunning hazel eyes of his. I brought a hand to the side of his face. “Thank you…” 

Julian chuckled, placing his hand over mine. “Thank _you_ for letting me touch you like this and see you orgasm, Cody… It was truly a beautiful sight to behold,” he said. I leaned down to leave a soft peck on his lips before I made myself decent again, doing my pants back up before climbing off of Julian so he could toss his handkerchief in the laundry. 

Peggy made her way back into the living area again, meowing at me. I stuck my tongue out at her, but she didn’t show any reaction. 

Julian came back and picked up Peggy on his way over to me, holding her in his arms and rocking her back and forth until she decided she had enough and hopped off of him to go do her own thing. 

“What would you like to do now, Cody?” Julian asked me, taking my hand in his own as his thumb gently stroked my skin. I took a moment to think. “Is it okay if we can have some coffee and just cuddle and talk?” I asked him.

He chuckled softly. “Of course. Coffee for two coming right up,” he said before standing up and heading to the kitchen. 

I sighed, closing my eyes and held a hand over my chest. _I’m falling in love with him,_ I thought to myself with a small smile. 

* * *

The following weeks after our first sexual encounter, I found that I had truly fallen in love with Julian. Not only was I doing amazing in his class, but our relationship had grown even stronger since then. We would have moments where I would talk about really personal stuff, and he would comfort me even when I got emotional. He was always taking care of me.

Even though I’d always been bad with talking to others and dealing with their emotions, whenever Julian was feeling stressed out or overwhelmed about work, I encouraged him to take a break to talk or cuddle with me for a while. It always seemed to lift his spirits even a little bit.

Everything about him made me feel good inside _and_ out, and I knew that I wanted him to take my virginity… I was ready. 

I had taken a few condoms that were for free at the guidance counsellor’s office and decided to bring one with me in my pocket one Friday evening when I went over to Julian’s. He was busy grading assignments while drinking coffee as usual, so I decided to be patient and play with Peggy while I waited until he finished. Peggy was actually quite a fun cat, even if she was a bit needy for attention. 

After Julian decided he needed a break, he leaned back on the kitchen chair he was sitting on and began to stretch with a loud sigh of relief. I got up from the couch to walk over to him, placing a hand on his shoulder as he looked at me, pulling me into his lap as I smiled and leaned in to capture his lips and kiss him. 

He smiled back into the kiss, reciprocating it passionately as he laced his fingers with mine. I held onto his shoulders as I deepened the kiss, parting my lips wider as I let Julian explore my mouth with his own. 

We spent a good few minutes just passionately making out, until we pulled away to catch our breaths. I placed a hand on his chest as he placed his hand over mine. “Is there anything you’d like to do, Cody?” He asked me. He always asked me what _I_ wanted, and it always made me happy that he would do that.

I nodded. “Julian, I…” I took a moment to inhale deeply to try and calm my nerves before asking. “I want you to take my virginity,” I finally said, feeling myself suddenly become bashful after asking it out loud. 

Julian gave me a gentle smile, stroking my hand with his thumb like he always did when he held my hand. “If you feel that you’re ready for that, then I’m for it, all the way,” he said with a nod. “I admit, I’ve been wanting to have sex with you, Cody. But I didn’t want to ask you in case you felt pressured to. I know that you’re inexperienced, so I didn’t want to bring it up until you were ready.” 

“I’ve been thinking it over for a while, and I really want you to,” I said. And I meant it. I _wanted_ him so badly, I couldn’t think of my first time being with anybody else. “So, Julian… Please take me.” 

Julian’s smile grew wider before he picked me up as he stood up from the chair, making me gasp as he carried me in his arms to the bedroom and placed me down on his bed. Julian climbed over me, leaning down to kiss me as I kissed him back, the two of us going back to making out but on his bed this time. 

I hooked an arm around his neck to pull him closer as his hands found my sides, gripping onto me and he grinded his crotch down against mine. I sighed into his mouth as we continued to share sloppy kisses, both of us getting caught up in our lust. 

He began to lift my hoodie, as I raised my arms and tossed it aside as he went back to kissing me, his hand running up my pale chest as I felt electricity run through my body. I felt his fingers pinch at one of my nipples as I moaned into his mouth, eliciting a chuckle from him. He moved his lips down to leave kisses from my jaw, down my neck, across my collarbones, and all over my chest as I couldn’t help but slightly giggle at how good it felt having Julian kiss my body so much. 

His lips moved down along my abdomen until they reached the top of my pants. I guess he saw the packaged condom sticking out from my front pocket because he took it out, smirking at me. “Good boy, you came prepared. Did you get this from the guidance counsellor’s office?”

“Maybe,” I responded as he simply chuckled. “Well, I’m happy to see that the free condoms are actually being used,” he said, before undoing my jeans and pulling them down my legs. Once they were off of me he tossed them aside somewhere else before he reached for the waistband of my trunks that I was wearing, looking at me for permission. Of course, I eagerly nodded. 

He carefully pulled them down and let my cock spring free, which was already half-hard just from us making out. He tossed them to join the rest of my garments before motioning towards my legs. “Can you spread your legs for me?”

I immediately pulled up my knees and spread my legs for him, feeling my face redden in embarrassment from being completely naked with my legs spread like I was some kind of whore, but the way Julian took his time to admire me like this as if I was a piece of art made me feel less sheepish and more excited for what he planned to do with me. 

He moved back up to kiss me again as I kissed him back. It didn’t last long as he brought two fingers to my lips, making me take them into my mouth as I sucked them wantonly. “Such a good boy,” he whispered, slightly groaning at how pretty I probably looked sucking his fingers, getting them nice and wet with my saliva. 

Once his fingers were slick enough, he reached under me and I softly gasped when I felt a finger probe at my virgin hole. I never had anything in my ass before, never even exploring fingering myself when I masturbated, so just having Julian slowly insert his finger inside me already was making me squirm and whimper. It didn’t feel painful, but it was quite a bit uncomfortable.

“Are you alright, Cody? Would you like to stop here?” Julian asked me, looking at me with genuine concern on his face. I shook my head. “N-no, I’m fine. Continue, please…” 

He smiled at me before going back to concentrating on his finger inside of me, pushing it all the way in down to his knuckle before I squirmed again. _Ah!_ It actually didn’t feel so bad… Even just knowing that I had Julian’s finger inside me was getting me harder. 

Julian slowly thrust his finger back and forth inside me before he pulled his finger out, adding the second slick finger inside my hole as I closed my eyes and softly whined out his name.

“Good boy,” he muttered again, being slow and careful as he continued to prep me, making sure that I was good enough before he would actually fuck me. He fingered me at a steady pace and would spread his fingers inside me, as I bit down on my lip and moaned _._

Once Julian decided that I was prepped enough and pulled his fingers out of me, I softly whined and pouted as he looked up at me, giving a look as if asking what I needed. I tugged at his shirt, which was a deep yellow button-down shirt he tucked into his belted khakis. “Can I see you naked too?” I asked. 

He chuckled. “Of course. Anything for you,” he said before sitting up, undoing the buttons of his shirt and taking it off. I brought my thumb to my mouth as I bit down on a nail, admiring how gorgeous Julian’s body was. He wasn’t so muscular, but I could tell that he worked out from time to time to keep fit, as there were undiscovered abdominals just waiting to be toned. He had a bit of hair from his chest down to lead under the belt, and I bit my lip imagining how far down the hair would lead to.

He undid his belt, pulling it out and tossing it aside before undoing his pants as well, taking them off before letting it join the rest of our garments. He was a briefs wearer, just like how I imagined, but I didn’t get a good chance to admire him in just his underwear as he soon took those off as well, and he was just as I’d imagined he would be—he was packing a beautiful averagely sized circumcised dick that had a gorgeous pink tip. The hair that led from his chest continued down to the base, and his balls were just the right size to accompany his cock. _Damn,_ I felt so lucky. 

He spat into his hand before gripping his cock, stroking himself as he admired me, making me feel so _beautiful._

“I could watch you forever,” he said lowly, pumping his cock in his hand as I could only blush, not knowing what to say. I just watched as he groaned and panted, beating his cock quickly while keeping eye contact with me.

Once he was hard, he took the condom and opened it up, taking the condom out of the package before rolling it onto himself. I just watched, feeling myself getting more aroused from just seeing Julian put the condom on his beautiful cock. 

After the lubricated condom was on him, he stroked my thigh with a hand and looked at me. “I want to put it in you, Cody. But I want to make sure that you’re _really_ sure about this.” 

I nodded. “Please,” I breathily let out. “Please make love to me, Julian… I never wanted anything more, so please put it in me…” 

Julian smirked. “Good boy,” he said before aligning himself with my entrance, slowly putting the tip in as I sighed. Just knowing Julian barely had his dick in me… _Fuck,_ it was so hot. 

He began penetrating me deeper, and I closed my eyes, the pain being overtaken by the overwhelming pleasure of just having Julian inside me.

“Y-you’re inside me, Julian…” I let out, smiling as I moaned out, my eyes tearing up in happiness. “I can’t believe I have Julian’s dick in me… Oh, God…” 

Julian smiled, pushing himself all the way in me as he stayed there, warming his cock inside of me. “Wow, you’re so nice and tight, Cody… So warm, I could stay like this in you forever.”

_I’m Julian’s cocksleeve,_ I thought to myself as I tried to cover my flustered face with my hands, but Julian shook his head and brought them away. “I want to see your pretty face while I’m inside you, Cody.” 

My erection was painfully hard, and I bit my lip before asking Julian, “Can I touch myself?” 

Julian nodded, almost pulling himself out of me before thrusting in again, making me whine out loud. “Go ahead, I’d love to see you touch your cute dick for me.” 

Once I was used to the feeling of Julian inside of me, I could no longer feel any pain. All I wanted was for him to have his way with me. 

My right hand grabbed my cock, squeezing and tugging on it while Julian began to pick up the pace of his thrusting, moving a bit faster now as he gripped onto my thighs. His dark hair fell in his face and his glasses were fogged up from how flustered he was while fucking me. I felt like I was on cloud nine, completely giving my body up to this gorgeous man who I loved. 

Soon, Julian thrust at a certain angle that made me widen my eyes and gasp as I felt shockwaves all throughout my body. 

“Th-there…!” I cried out, tears flowing out of my eyes as I stroked myself faster. Julian smiled and pulled his hips back before thrusting into the same spot again with a grunt as I cried out his name. I was feeling so hot even though I was completely naked, sweating from my forehead as my whole body felt warm with pleasure.

“Pretty boy, so damn beautiful,” Julian murmured before continuing to thrust into me, hitting that sweet spot inside me over and over again as I just continued to desperately stroke my hard cock and let out whines and moans. I was convinced this was heaven on earth _._

“I love those sounds you’re making, Cody,” Julian said with a chuckle.

“J-Julian…” I whimpered, feeling myself getting closer to my climax with each thrust into my prostate. “I’m… I’m gonna…” 

Julian seemed to be completely lost in his pleasure as well, panting heavily as he continued to fuck me deeply. “Me too, Cody…” 

All it took were a few more sloppy thrusts into me and a hard squeeze to my dick before I shut my eyes and felt my dick spasm and ejaculate. He groaned and came as well, feeling his grip on me tighten as his cock pulsated within me. My mind and body were overtaken with a wave of complete utter bliss. 

After the both of us took a few moments to catch our breaths and calm ourselves down, Julian carefully pulled himself out of me and leaned down, moving my sweaty hair out of my face before gently leaving a kiss on my forehead. “Are you feeling alright, Cody?” 

I exhaled deeply, smiling at him as my eyes were still glossy with tears. “I’m so happy,” I whispered, bringing a hand to his face, his stubble tickling the palm of my hand. “I love you, Julian…”

Julian smiled back, taking my hand and kissing the palm of it tenderly before bringing it back to his face. “I love you too, Cody.” 

I couldn’t help but grin wider hearing him say that _he loved me_ after he took my virginity. I felt like I was in some kind of wonderful dream and I hoped that I would never wake up. 

“I’m going to go throw the condom out. I’ll be right back,” Julian said before getting up from the bed and walking down the hall to the bathroom. I just laid there, staring at the ceiling that had an oatmeal-like texture to it. _I seriously can’t believe I just had sex for the first time, with the man I love…_

I began to feel slightly chilly from being naked. I decided to pull down the covers before moving my legs underneath the sheets, pulling them back up to cover my body as I waited for Julian to return. Whenever Julian and I would cuddle in bed and fall asleep together, we were always fully clothed—so it felt a bit uncomfortable being totally naked in bed. 

Julian came back from the bathroom, picking up his briefs from the floor and putting them back on. He took his glasses off and placed them on the nightstand before he climbed into bed with me, noticing I was still naked. “Do you want to put on some clothes, Cody? I don’t want you to be cold.” 

“Yeah, I actually wanna put my trunks back on,” I admitted. He chuckled. “Go ahead.” 

I leaned over the edge of my side of the bed, reaching for my grey trunks and slipping them back on before returning to Julian as he kissed my cheek and wrapped his arm around me. I inhaled softly into his chest and could smell that wonderful subtle scent of his cologne. He was so warm. 

_Heaven truly is a place on earth,_ I thought to myself with a smile before Julian and I both fell asleep in each other's arms. 

* * *

The morning after, I awoke to the warmth on my face of the sun slightly streaming through the closed blinds, while feeling Julian’s arm around me, his warm body pressed against mine. I smiled to myself, remembering the events of the previous evening. 

_I’m so glad it wasn’t a dream,_ I thought to myself, lightly running a finger over Julian’s chest. _Julian took my virginity and told me he loved me… I don’t know if life could get any more perfect than this._

I used my hand to move Julian’s deep brown hair out of his face to see his beautiful sleeping face. He was so handsome, and I still couldn’t quite believe that a man like this was mine. It was like he was _made_ for me.

He slightly stirred and rolled onto his back as I was scared I might have accidentally woke him. But he seemed to continue to snooze away, so I sighed in relief. 

My legs and backside were feeling quite a bit sore from last night. _Julian really did a number on me… Not that I’m complaining at all. If getting fucked like that causes pain like this, then bring it on._

I felt blood beginning to rush down south at the thought of Julian and I having sex again. My hand was lightly palming at my crotch as I bit down on my lip. _I’m starting to get horny again, I’m such a pervert, aren’t I?_

I slightly pulled down the covers, revealing the lower half of Julian’s body. I licked my lips seeing his bulge clad in his white briefs. I was rubbing myself through my underwear harder, softly sighing. I _really_ wanted him. 

I didn’t know what came over me—I’d only lost my virginity the previous night and now I was needy for more. I climbed over his legs and gently tugged down the waistband before carefully pulling them down to his knees. 

His cock was soft, but I still wanted to touch it and please it, just like in my fantasies. Julian did all the work the previous night, and I wanted to be the one able to touch _him_ this time…

I lowered myself down to his length, taking my time to admire it, holding it at the base with a hand. He softly sighed, but didn’t wake up. I used my other hand to pull the covers over myself so his legs and my own body could stay warm. 

I wrapped my hand around the base and brought my mouth down to experimentally lick at his head, making him murmur something I couldn’t hear. I looked up and he seemed to still be sleeping. 

I made a soft _‘tsk tsk’_ sound with my tongue as I took a moment to evaluate the flavour. He tasted salty… But I liked it. 

I slowly licked from the bottom of the head up the slit, getting more of that salty taste in my mouth as Julian slightly stirred again and moaned softly. 

I smiled wickedly. I liked being in control like this for once. I felt so _naughty._

I gathered my saliva in my mouth before spitting on his cock, wrapping my lips around it before slowly sliding my mouth down his length. It was a bit of an awkward occurrence, as I wasn’t sure what to do about my teeth and I couldn’t take the cock all the way into my throat without gagging (as it was my first time ever trying to put something down my throat), so I decided to take it down the farthest I felt comfortable and bob my head up and down from there.

_Julian’s dick is in my mouth… He tastes so good,_ I thought to myself as I squeezed the base tighter and continued working myself back and forth on him, eagerly using my hot, wet mouth to please him. 

“Mmph… Cody…” Julian whimpered softly, making me widen my eyes and look up at him. He was still asleep! 

_He even dreams of_ me _when he’s asleep, wanting me to be the one giving him pleasure…_ I slowly stroked him at the base as I continued to bob my head up and down on his wet cock, getting it harder as Julian sighed out my name again. 

I used my other hand to slowly stroke my dick through my trunks while my mouth was working Julian’s cock. I moved my mouth off from him with a popping noise before spitting on his length again, slowly licking the underside of his cock from his balls all the way up to the head as he moaned. 

Soon, Julian finally woke up, sleepily rubbing his eye with a hand before he suddenly froze in suspicion, lifting the covers that hid me as he was greeted with me sloppily jerking and sucking his cock.

He chuckled in amusement, smiling down at me. “What a wonderful thing to wake up to. Good morning, Cody.” 

I popped off of him again, continuing to jerk him in my hand as I blushed and smiled. “Good morning, Julian… I-I really wanted to please you, and I just couldn’t wait. I didn’t want to interrupt your sleep…” 

Julian shook his head. “By all means, continue. I love waking up to having such a beautiful boy pleasing me,” he said as he patted my head with his hand, ruffling my blonde hair. 

I smiled before spitting on his cock again, going back in to take him into my mouth. I tried my best not to get my teeth in the way, as I’ve overheard from boys back in high school that it ruins the experience for the receiver. 

Julian sighed as his fingers scratched at my scalp, encouraging me. I looked up at him as I bobbed my head up and down while jerking him, getting him hard, pleasing myself in the process. His face was flushed, and it was really lovely seeing him look flustered without his glasses on to hide part of his face. I got to see him losing himself in his pleasure in its full glory, all because of _me._

If my mouth wasn’t busy taking dick, I would have been smiling from ear to ear. 

I began to pick up the pace of my jerking and my head bobbing, wanting nothing but to please him, using my mouth in whatever way possible to make him happy. 

His cock was nice and hard in my mouth now, and I popped off of him as a glob of saliva still connected my lips to the head of his dick. “D-do you want me to swallow it when you cum?” I asked him shyly. 

Julian shook his head as he lifted my chin and looked into my eyes. “No, I think I’d rather see it on your gorgeous face,” he said, making me blush even deeper. 

I went back to putting my mouth in him as I continued to jerk him off, quickly beating him in my hand as I moved my mouth quickly back and forth on his length, pleasing him just like that as all I could think about was submitting myself completely to Julian and pleasing him as best as I could. 

“Cody… Nnn…” He grunted, pulling me by the hair off of him as I took that as a signal that he was going to cum soon. I continued to quickly jerk him, rubbing the upper half of his cock against my cheek. “You can cum on my face, Julian… I want it all on my face, mark me as yours…”

And Julian came, _hard,_ as I shut my eyes feeling the warm semen splatter upon my face, getting it in my hair, over one of my closed eyes, my nose, and a bit in my mouth as I had parted my lips in an attempt to try and catch some of it. 

Julian exhaled deeply as he lifted my chin, admiring me as he took his time to bask in how beautiful he probably thought I looked with his cum on my face. “So fucking stunning,” he murmured. 

Every time he called me some form of _beautiful_ , I swore I could feel my heart skip a beat. I always knew that I was _‘pretty’_ but I never really cared—but Julian truly made me _feel_ beautiful. 

I wiped my face with the back of my hand before I opened my eyes. Julian chuckled, beckoning me to come up to him. I moved upwards to him and he took my hand, pulling me close as he kissed my forehead. “I love you so much, Cody,” he whispered. I gave him a little smile. “I love you too.”

“How about we go shower, love?” He suggested in a soft voice as I smiled and nodded. “Okay.”

* * *

And so Julian and I went to hit the shower together, and I couldn’t stop giggling at how he would thoroughly clean me with his hands, which eventually led to us having sex _again…_ but in the shower this time. 

Yeah, I knew it was probably bad for my poor backside, but as I said, the pleasure totally outweighs the pain. 

After we were clean, I changed into some clean clothes I brought with me and Julian changed as well, and he made coffee for the two of us while he asked me to fill Peggy’s food bowls. 

We spent the morning going over the lesson for the week. I appreciated that Julian was willing to help, even though I was perfectly fine and dandy understanding the material on my own, he was still a little bit strict with making sure I was doing well in his class fair and square. I jokingly asked him if he only gave me good grades on the homework and assignments because I was his boyfriend, to which he responded that even though I was his boyfriend, he’d still fail me if I was actually doing bad in his class. 

After we finished going over the lesson, we spent some time just cuddling on the couch and talking.

“What do you love about me?” I asked Julian, leaning my head against his chest. I didn’t know where the question suddenly came from, but I was curious. Julian slowly rubbed my back. 

“I love everything about you, Cody,” he said. “But I know you probably expected me to say that. If you want to know a few things about you _specifically_ that I love… I love how passionate you are about literature, the same as me. Your eyes sparkle every time you talk about a book you’re interested in, and it reminds me a bit of myself.” He let out a small chuckle. “You’re smart, and it clearly shows from your completed homework and assignments to your witty sarcasm whenever we talk. You’re usually quite blunt too, which I appreciate. It’s refreshing, and I love having you around. You’re really not quite like anyone I ever met, Cody,” he said with a smile. “Not to mention, you’re absolutely _gorgeous._ I know I say it all the time, but it’s true. You’re beautiful inside and out. Sometimes I truly can’t wrap my head around how _ethereal_ you are.”

I couldn’t help but blush when he said all that about me. All I could do was wrap my arms around him and embrace him tightly. “I love you so much,” I softly said as he kissed my cheek before embracing me back. “I love you too, Cody.” 

Peggy seemed to want some love as well, climbing onto the couch and cuddling up with us as we both shared a laugh together.

I truly felt like I was on top of the world. Here I had this _perfect_ man, who loved me and I loved him—and I couldn’t ask for anything more than just to be with him forever. I prayed in that moment to God that I could have days like this for the rest of my life.

But I wish I knew then not to get my hopes up.

One thing the two men I loved had in common was that they were both my first—Daniel was my first kiss, and Julian took my virginity. 

If only I knew then that the second thing they had in common was that they both left me when I needed them most.


	5. Part I - Chapter 4: Julian

After about a month of the workload of my courses increasing, finishing midterms, and Julian and I spending a lot of time together (either to have sex or not), I finally had finished _Where to Find Me In Hell._ After realizing the demon woman’s true intentions from the beginning, Samuel had gone through a period of self-hatred and begged for forgiveness from God. After he had worked through some self changes and put himself back on the right track, he ditches the demon woman to focus solely on reconnecting with his childhood friend in heaven. By the end of the story, he and his friend both happily reunite in the afterlife.

What the hell kind of bland, generic, typical happy ending was _that?_ And here I was the entire time, hoping that Samuel would end up _embracing_ his newfound love for this tempting woman that he fell for, this woman who gave him _everything,_ accepting his fate to forever spend the rest of his life in hell. Maybe the story would have been more interesting if it went in that route.

But no, he decides to stick on his path of being some boring goody-two-shoes just to be with some girl he had been pining over since childhood. I thought it was _pathetic._ He had fallen in love with the demon woman and _still_ loved her even after finding out her true intentions, but decided to back out of spending the rest of his life with her just for a “pure” life?

_Bull. Shit._

Julian and I ended up having a little bit of a disagreement over our opinions when it came to the ending of the novel. 

“I finished the book,” I said to him when I came over to his apartment. I was seated on the couch and Peggy was comfortably laying down across my lap as I rubbed her belly. 

“Oh? So, what did you think?” Julian asked me as he was washing dishes in the kitchen. 

I sighed. “I’m disappointed,” I honestly admitted. “I thought the ending was awful.” 

Julian didn’t seem to give much of a reaction, as if he expected that I would say something like that. “Ah, is that so? I can’t say I’m really surprised.” 

I tilted my head in thought. “What’s that supposed to mean?” 

He finished cleaning the last dish before putting it on the drying rack as he wiped his hands with a towel. “Well, it seems a lot of younger audience who’ve read the book seem to think the same,” he said with a small smile, crossing his arms. “They all usually seem to find that they favoured the demon woman and wanted Samuel to choose her instead.” 

I shrugged as Peggy rolled over and hopped off my lap. “I mean, she had much more personality than that _Mary-Sue_ lady.” 

Julian chuckled, pushing up his glasses. “Those who are older usually find that Samuel made the right choice. I suppose I really am getting old.” 

I rolled my eyes before checking my phone. I had uploaded a selfie set the previous night on _Flumblr_ of me laying in Julian’s bed wearing a bright yellow shirt, with a vintage filter over the photos that matched the colour of the shirt. 

I smirked. _Seven hundred and thirty-three likes. A lot of people really like seeing me, huh?_

I suddenly realized at that moment that I had grown somewhat of an ego lately. From getting more and more popular on social media to no longer being a virgin, I felt like my head had grown a few sizes bigger. 

“What’s got you smirking?” Julian curiously asked as he sat down next to me, his arm around me as he kissed my cheek. 

I scrolled through my notifications. “I got a lot of likes on my recent _Flumblr_ post,” I said, pulling up the post before turning my phone screen to him to show him. 

He smiled. “That shirt looks good on you,” he said before kissing my cheek again before suddenly his expression dropped. “I’m not in any of the photos that you posted, am I?” 

I shook my head. “Of course not. I wouldn’t ever post anything that could have anyone suspect anything,” I said with a smile, pressing a finger to my lips. “I’m very smart, you know.” 

Julian gave a small smile before kissing my cheek once more, pulling me into an embrace. “Yes, you are. You’re my smart, beautiful, amazing boy…” 

I giggled against him. “I know.” 

* * *

A few weeks had gone by since I finished the book. I had tried to return it to Julian, but he insisted that I keep it until the end of the semester and perhaps ponder more on the ending. 

My mind had already been made up, though. I _hated_ it. No amount of _‘pondering’_ would change that. But since I loved him, I decided maybe I could at least keep the book in my possession until the end of the semester if he really wanted me to. 

It had started becoming colder, as well. Halloween had approached, and although there were plenty of events going on regarding the holiday on campus, none of it really interested me. Nia had dressed up as a black cat and was going to some house party with her friends while I just decided to stay in and work on assignments for school. Nia insisted that the next house party he got invited to, she would bring me. Of course, I playfully told her off. 

Julian seemed to be a bit more stressed out than usual, and I assumed that it had to do with him having to grade so many midterm assignments. But whenever I would ask him if he was okay, he would always insist that he was fine. He had become a bit more quiet and distant as well, as if there was something he was hiding.

I would never forget the bomb he dropped on me that one Saturday afternoon. 

* * *

It was one Saturday afternoon that Julian had asked me to come over. The previous night I didn’t come over because he apologized and said that he wanted to spend the night alone to have some time for himself. Which of course, I let him. I know that everyone needs their alone time where they need to have some space for themselves, I sure know I do. 

But I couldn’t help but slightly worry about him that night as I spent time in my dorm room getting on my knees by my bed and folding my hands together, saying a prayer to God to watch over Julian. Maybe it was stupid of me to only pray when I _needed_ to, but I wanted to do whatever I could to make sure whatever Julian was going through would be resolved soon. 

Nia had walked in on me praying and apologized for interrupting, but she wondered why I wasn’t _‘at my boyfriend’s place as I usually was on Friday nights.’_ When I told her that he wanted to spend the evening by himself, she patted me on the shoulder and offered to hang out with me, as if something was _wrong._

When I got a text on that Saturday morning from Julian asking me to come over so we could talk, I assumed this was a sign that God had listened to my prayers. 

Yeah, he sure listened, alright. 

When I came over to Julian’s place, he didn’t smile and come over to kiss me like he usually did. He was biting down on his thumb in nervous thought as he gestured towards the couch with the other hand, saying _“have a seat, Cody,”_ in a low and somewhat cold voice. 

I took my shoes off before walking over to the couch and sitting myself down, gulping nervously. “Is everything okay?” I asked, looking at him. 

Julian sighed before he sat down next to me. “I need to talk to you about something important. I needed to think it all over before telling you.” 

“What is it?” I asked, beginning to feel my chest become heavy. I knew that whatever it was, it definitely wasn’t going to be good news. 

Julian sighed and hung his head for a moment in thought as he still held my hand. “I’ve been granted an opportunity to teach at _Falconview.”_

_Falconview… That’s a prestigious university far out west from here,_ I thought to myself, remembering that I had considered applying there before, but it was way too far from home, almost all the way across the country. “Julian, that’s great. I know you’ve always wanted to teach at a prestigious school,” I said with a smile.

Julian slowly nodded. “Yes. I… I wasn’t sure at first if I should have accepted. I’m happy here, with _you…”_ He inhaled deeply. “But I’m going to go for it. I’m going to chase my dreams.” 

All I could do was nod and smile. “Okay, well I’m happy for you, Julian,” I said. “When are you leaving? 

“After this semester,” he said, and suddenly I felt my heart drop as my face fell. _I only have two more months left with him…?_

Julian blinked, as if he was unsure if he was ready to continue speaking. He exhaled. “Cody… I want you to know that the time that I’ve spent with you have been some of the best days of my life,” he said as he squeezed my hand. “I couldn’t have been happier if it were anyone else. I _love_ you, and I want you to know that whatever happens, I believe in you. And I know that you’re going to go places.” 

I could feel tears stinging my eyes. “What are you saying, Julian…?” 

Julian lowered his head and sighed. “This relationship we have… I think it’s a good idea to end it.” 

I swore in that moment that I felt like I got stabbed in the gut. Everything just seemed to have stopped at that moment, and I couldn’t quite believe what I was hearing.

“Wh...why?” I gently said, my voice shaking. “I love you.” 

“I love you too, Cody… But I don’t think it’s going to work out well with such distance between us,” he said sadly. “We would never be able to see each other.” 

“I don’t care about that!” I said, slightly raising my voice. “We could text every day, video call, all that stuff…” 

Julian sighed again. “Cody… I can’t do long distance. I’ve tried it before, and it doesn’t end well.” 

Tears were streaming down my face as I sniffled. “I don’t care, I love you… I-I just want to be with you…” I weakly said, crying into his shoulder as he exhaled deeply and wrapped an arm around me, just holding me as I sobbed into him. 

Julian pulled back and looked at me, who was probably ugly crying at that point. “Cody… I don’t want you to feel like you’re at fault,” he said, moving my hair out of my face. “I don’t want you to feel like you’re chained to me, either. I want you to go on and love someone just as unconditionally as you loved me,” he said as I just sniffled, wiping my tears with my sleeve. “But… I only want you,” I insisted.

“Where would this go, Cody? We can’t have a secret relationship to hide from everyone for the rest of our lives,” he said in a more serious tone. “How would your family react knowing you were having a secret relationship with your own professor? How would that affect both our careers if anyone found out?” He looked into my eyes, and I could tell he was being genuine. Like he wasn’t doing this to hurt me, but rather because he _loved_ me. “I want you to live the best life that you can. You’re young, and there’s so much for you to do. Wouldn’t you want to spend your life with someone you could be with all the time, and not have to worry about having to hide or making sure that you’re not in the same picture together?” He said.

The thing is, what he was saying _did_ make sense to me. I never gave thoughts as to where our secret affair would officially lead to. How _would_ my family react, knowing I had seduced my professor? How would Julian’s family react, knowing he had a relationship with his own student? All I focused on was on things _as_ they were happening, so all I ever thought about when it came to Julian and I was what was happening in the _present._ So it was true—our relationship truly wasn’t meant to last forever. I knew that was true, but I just wish it didn’t hurt so much. 

I closed my eyes and sighed, calming myself down. “But I love _you,”_ was all I could say as Julian placed his hands around my face. His hands felt warm. “I love you too, Cody. But I don’t want us to hold each other back,” he said as he wiped my tears with his thumbs. 

I sniffled. “Do you want your book back?” I asked out of nowhere. Julian shook his head. “You can keep it, Cody. It’s the least I could give you.” 

Julian spent a while just holding me as I just cried in his arms, still trying to come to terms with what was going on. Everything Julian and I had built… My perfect life… It was all over. 

* * *

I didn’t come by Julian’s place anymore. We had stopped seeing each other outside of school, stopped texting, stopped anything that would have made us a couple. 

I had skipped his classes following our break-up and rather just submitted all my homework and assignments electronically. I couldn’t bear to see or hear him anymore. It was too painful. I found myself just sleeping in my dorm room all the time instead and it had Nia worried about me, as she figured out that I was going through a break-up. She had been extra nice to me, offering to take me out to go do things with her. Even when we did go out to do things, I still couldn’t cheer up. I was still heartbroken. 

One night I had found _Where to Find Me In Hell_ in my room when I was looking for something else. I gulped, feeling my heart sink just seeing that stupid book. I thought about Samuel and that pathetic ending where he chooses his stupid ‘dream’ just because he was scared to spend his time with someone who was a bad influence on him. _So what if she was a demon? She loved Samuel and gave him everything he could ever ask for…_

Then it hit me like a fucking freight train. 

I remembered how much Julian had defended Samuel’s actions and found that he sympathized with his decision. I clenched my fists, thinking about how he had chosen to live his happy life teaching at a prestigious school than to stay with _me._

I wanted to burn that fucking book. 

I looked in the mirror, staring at my reflection in the dark for a good while. _So, I’m the demon tempting him, aren’t I?_ I asked myself, wanting to laugh even though I was angry.

_Fine, then._ I breathed in, smirking at myself. Something within me changed after that revelation. Something _switched_ inside me. 

_I’ll be a demon. Just wait and see._

* * *

Nia had come back from her class and saw me sitting on my bed doing my homework. “Cody, how are you doing?” She asked me as she sat on her bed across from mine. 

I sighed. “I mean, it is what it is, I guess,” I said with a shrug. “I’m not happy about it, but there’s nothing I can do.” 

She must have sensed how down I was, as she seemed to suddenly remember something. “Hey, remember when I said that I’d take you to the next house party I got invited to? I got an invite for one next Friday night. How ‘bout it?” She suggested, giving me a pleading look like she really wanted me to say yes. 

Normally, I would have turned it down so I could spend time inside reading or something, but I felt like I was a brand-new Cody and decided _why the fuck not!_ This could be a good opportunity to have some _real_ university life fun and let myself get loose and wild for once.

“Alright, I’m down,” I said with a nod, which even surprised Nia. “Really? Great! It’s gonna be epic,” she said with a big smile. “Can’t wait!” 

I nodded, even looking forward to it myself. _My first party… I wonder how it will turn out. I’m nervous, but more intrigued as to what it’ll be like._

* * *

After anticipating it all week, the day of the party finally rolled around. It was just like everyone says—girls _do_ take a long time to get ready. Nia probably spent over an hour doing her makeup. For her wardrobe, she wore those netting-type stockings and matching gloves, her outfit all-black with hints of green. I just decided on wearing a hoodie and jeans with a black jacket thrown over it.

“How do I look?” She asked me, making me look up from my phone. I didn’t know anything about female fashion, but I thought she looked really good. 

“Nice,” I said with a nod. “I hope you won’t be cold.” 

She smiled at me. “A hoe never gets cold. And by the way, you look good too. Love that sweater-jacket combo. Always a fashionable choice.” 

The two of us finished getting ready before we headed out for the party that was somewhere in a nearby neighbourhood. Nia called for a ride from her ride-sharing app on her phone to pick us up and bring us to the party.

When the driver dropped us off, Nia and I got out of the car before standing in the parking lot of the house. It was a corner house with a large yard and hidden by trees, and we could hear the bass of the music blasting from inside the house and the loud mixed voices of the crowds of people inside as well.

“You ever been to a house party?” Nia asked me and I shook my head. “No. Never been to any parties outside of ones with family.” 

Nia laughed. “Well, we should probably stick together, then. Don’t want a poor little baby fish like you swimming deep in the ocean alone,” she said as she pinched my cheek, making me lightly slap her hand away as she just laughed again. 

We made our way inside, the house being crowded with a bunch of drunk, sweaty, and loud young adults. I stayed close to Nia while we were careful to walk around other people while she checked her phone to know where her friends were. 

“Shots?” Some guy offered to the two of us. He practically shoved the shot glasses in our faces and we pretty much had no choice but to take them. Nia threw her head back as she downed the shot before quickly shaking her head and sighing, giving the shot class back to the guy as he nodded as if he was impressed. 

I nervously looked down at the small glass in my hand that was filled with a transparent, pungent liquid. I never drank alcohol before, and there was something telling me that I shouldn’t, but something also telling me _hell,_ why not.

I did the same as Nia, shutting my eyes as I threw my head back and downed the shot in a single gulp before slightly stumbling back and gagging. It tasted _awful._ The guy laughed before nodding approvingly. “Alright, alright. Have fun,” he said before walking away somewhere to bother some other people. 

Nia smiled at me. “You okay?” She asked, probably knowing this was my first time touching alcohol. I nodded. “Yeah,” I said before she checked her phone again. “Ah, my friends are in the attic upstairs. Let’s go,” she said before I nodded.

The two of us headed to the house’s attic, where there were two other girls smoking from what I assumed was a bong. I had seen them in movies, but it was my first time seeing one in real life. It was made out of pink glass and covered in cartoon stickers.

“Hey,” the two of them greeted us as Nia smiled at them. “Heya. This is my roommate, Cody,” she said, introducing me as I gave a small wave. 

“Come sit, have a hit,” the two girls said to us as we walked over to sit in front of them on the attic floor. 

One of the girls handed the bong to me and I took it, clueless as to what I was supposed to do with it. I could see Nia was trying to hold in her laughter.

“I've never done this before,” I said with a clueless blink. “Aw, baby’s first bong rip,” one of the girls mused as the rest of them giggled. 

I had always been told growing up about how bad marijuana was, and how I was going to hell if I were ever to try it…

_Fuck it, I’m already gay and lost my virginity to my professor, I’m truly a demon spawn, aren’t I?_

Nia instructed me and helped me before I took a hit, slowly exhaling to see the smoke leave my lips and rise into the air. Then I sputtered out a harsh cough, immediately making me lose whatever _coolness factor_ I had previously felt.

The girls all clapped as I couldn’t help but smile a bit. I passed the bong back to one of the girls before they all began talking about something that I wasn’t really paying attention to. 

Soon, not even a few minutes later, I blinked again, almost feeling like I got hit by something and my soul was sinking back _into_ my body. _Woah,_ I thought to myself as I blinked again, my face suddenly feeling heavy. 

_Oh boy. What have I gotten myself into?_

* * *

After about half an hour, the girls and I were laying down on the attic floor, laughing about something that I couldn’t remember what.

I could _not_ feel my fucking body. Any of it. When I tried to move my limbs, they felt like television static. I felt like I wasn’t even in my own body, but rather that I was merely a ghost driving a flesh mech. 

I didn’t know exactly how to describe it, but it felt good. _Really good._ I had to admit that I was initially scared when my high hit me—but Nia was here with me and assured me that everything was going to be okay.

“I love you, Nia,” I said out loud suddenly, a wide smile on my face. “Not to sound cheesy, but you’re my best friend. I never had anyone in my life like you. I’m so glad we met, I feel like I could cry.” My eyes actually _did_ start tearing up. “I’m so blessed to have such a good friend in my life,” I said dramatically.

“Shut up,” she said with a laugh, lightly slapping me. “I love you too, man.” 

The other two girls, whose names I couldn’t remember, turned out to be pretty cool. I don’t know if maybe it was just the weed listening and talking, but I got into a deep discussion with the three of them as we all continued to take hits from the bong.

I could feel the heavy rhythm of the bass from the music downstairs, and I couldn’t help but dance a little bit. “This song sounds like shit, and yet, I love it,” I admitted as the girls chuckled. “That’s pop music for ya,” one of them said. 

Nia sighed. “How are you doing, Cody?” She asked me. I just had the most stupid grin plastered across my face. “So good. I’ve never felt like this in my _life,_ it’s amazing. Almost forgot that I’m supposed to be heartbroken over my goddamn professor,” I said with a loud sigh.

The girls all went silent. It took me a few moments to realize what had slipped from my mouth. 

_Cody, you fucking imbecile…_

“You were fucking your prof?” Nia asked. I looked over at her and she just had this smile on her face as if she found it _amusing._ I shook my head, trying to deny it. “N-no, I was, uh… Joking.”

“Uh-huh. Right,” she said as she kept that smug smile on her face. “Well, you know I don’t judge. I won’t tell a soul, it’s going with me to the grave. Or… the urn. I want my ashes to be made into a gorgeous eyeshadow palette,” she said, doing the sign of the cross mockingly as I rolled my eyes. I didn’t really care too much if other people knew now. It was over, anyway. 

“That’s fucking awesome. I wish I was having an affair with _my_ prof… I really need a sugar daddy,” one of the girls said with a dreamy sigh before she lit the bong and took a hit again, blowing smoke into the air. 

“I wanna date someone older. It’s so much more exciting,” the other girl said, grinding more weed. “Guys our age are still so immature.”

“I really thought he was the one, fuck,” I said as I ran a hand through my hair. “I loved him so much.” 

Nia placed her hand on my shoulder. “I know you must have. You seemed so happy whenever I saw you,” she said. “But it’s not the end of the world.”

“I know it’s not,” I said, sighing loudly before I sat up. “You know what? I wanna go downstairs. I wanna have some fun.”

Nia raised an eyebrow before smiling. “Alright! Let’s party!” 

We said goodbye to Nia’s friends before I attempted to stand up and climb out from the attic back down to the upper floor of the house. I could hear the faint moans and some clapping sounds in the bedrooms from the hallway—so Nia and I hurried downstairs.

The party was still in full swing, and I had to blink a couple of times to make sure I was actually here. I could barely feel where I stepped as I got jostled around in the crowd. My body was pretty much on autopilot mode and my soul felt it was floating along with it, like a child holding onto a balloon. 

Everyone was jumping up and down and singing along to the incredibly loud hip hop song that came on. Nia and I stayed close together until she got invited by some pretty girl to do shots with her, which Nia couldn’t turn down. 

I tried my best to find a good wall to lean against, finally finding some room at a cozy-looking corner. I made my way over there before nearly falling into the corner after clumsily tripping over someone else’s feet. 

I took a moment just to stop for a moment and take it all in—being at a house party like the ones I’ve seen on television or read about in books. The awful smell of sweat and alcohol, barely any room to sit and relax, and the music pumping so loud I could have sworn it was going to give me permanent ear damage. It felt _good_ just getting lost in the moment like this, not having to worry about anything else. Even though I preferred staying inside doing my own thing, I had to admit that I always wanted to go to a party like this at least _once_ in my life and have this experience. 

“Hey there,” I heard a female voice say. I looked over to my side and saw a cute black girl and her possibly whasian male friend approaching me through the crowd. 

_They’re talking to me?_ I asked myself. “Hey,” I responded, even cracking a bit of a smile. Normally, I wouldn’t have even responded—I probably would have mumbled something before looking down. But I was still very much _zooted._

“Both me and my friend thought you were cute, so we figured we’d both come over and shoot our shot.” She giggled. 

_Shoot their shot? Does that mean they’re hitting on me?_ “I’m into dudes, I’m sorry,” I said to her apologetically. “But if I liked girls, you would have had me in a heartbeat,” I said. _Was that weed laced? I never would have said something that bold…_

She giggled again. “I’m flattered. Thank you,” she said before giving her friend a little push as he blushed before she went to go back to dancing and finding someone else to _‘shoot her shot’_ with. The guy stood beside me, sipping his drink. I guess he was _also_ suffering from being the party girl’s gay tag-along friend.

“What’s your name?” He asked me. 

“Cody. Yours?”

He nodded. “Noel. I’m nineteen,” he said. “I go to _Warrington.”_

“ _Warrington?_ It’s kinda far. What are you doing all the way here?”

He gestured to the crowd with his thumb. “My friend goes to the school nearby here, so she invited me to come just for this party.”

“Oh, I go to that school too. I’m eighteen,” I said with a nod. I was beginning to feel kind of thirsty, and Noel must have read my mind. “Cool. Can I get you a drink?” 

“Sure,” I said. Noel went off to refill his drink and get me one as well. He was kind of cute and he seemed nice, so I felt it would be rude to turn down a drink that he offered. 

He came back and we attempted to have a conversation over the loud music and the crowd. The drink was a bit strong for my taste, but it would be embarrassing not to drink it. I mentally told myself to stop being a _pussy_ and drink it.

We just had some smalltalk, about school and more basic shit as we stood in the corner watching the crowd. The more we talked, the closer Noel would get to me, and by the time I knew it, he was all up in my personal space and staring at my lips, as if he wanted to kiss me. 

So I let him. Why _wouldn’t_ I let a cute boy kiss me? 

He pressed his lips against mine and kissed me, and I kissed him back. Even though he seemed to be a nice guy, I didn’t feel anything when we kissed. Not even the slightest bit. 

We continued to kiss, because even though I didn’t really feel anything, it still felt nice to kiss someone. It just felt really _good_ to have someone to suck face with at a party like this, I felt like I was living my teen movie fantasy. 

After we took a moment to catch our breaths, we went right back into kissing with more fervour as I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him closer to deepen the kiss. Soon, I felt his hand on my ass, and I slightly whimpered as he caught it with his lips, feeling his tongue slipping into my mouth.

I tried to imagine that it was Julian who I was kissing instead, but it wasn’t the same. With Julian, every kiss was special. This one didn’t even come to a fraction close.

We were soon interrupted by someone shaking me by my shoulder as Noel and I stopped kissing. I turned to see the pretty girl from earlier who invited Nia to drink with her. “You’re Nia’s friend, right? Can you maybe bring her home? I think she’s gonna pass out or something,” she said to me with a worried look on her face. 

I widened my eyes. “Is she okay?”

“I think so… She just had a bit too many shots.” 

I gave Noel an apologetic look, and he gestured for me to go check on Nia. I followed the girl as we made our way through the crowd to see Nia sitting in a chair, hunched over as if she was ready to vomit. “Nia, let’s go,” I said to her as I lightly placed my hand on her shoulder. She looked up at me, immediately smiling and jumping up to hug me. “Cody! I’m having so much fun!” She squealed. I rolled my eyes, thinking about the ‘ _don’t touch each other without consent’_ rule we established. 

I led her through the crowd and Noel approached me as I stopped. “Hey, do you want me to call you guys a ride?” He asked me with concern.

I nodded. “That would be great. Thank you so much,” I said to him with a nod. Even though I wished that things could have maybe gone further between Noel and I, Nia was much more important. 

Noel arranged a ride for us using his phone, in which I thanked him again before he asked me if he could have my number, which I didn’t remember, so I had to read it out from my own phone to him. After that, I brought Nia outside of the house for some fresh air while we waited for our ride. She ended up vomiting off the side of the porch before apologizing to me. 

Once our ride came, I helped her get into the backseat before sitting beside her and telling the driver where our destination was. 

As the car drove along, I checked on Nia to see if she was okay.

“I’m sorry,” she said, a sad look on her face. “I fucked up.”

“What do you mean?” I asked her. My high had seemed to have mostly worn off, as I could actually feel my body was grounded again and I could think a lot clearer now. 

She pouted. “You could have been hooking up with some hot dude right now, but instead you’re here babysitting me…” She chuckled sadly. “I was supposed to be the one cheering _you_ up tonight.” 

I shook my head. “Are you kidding? I went to my first house party, did alcohol and drugs for the first time, and made out with a cute stranger. I consider all of that to be an amazing night already,” I said with a small smile. “I’m just worried about _you.”_

She softly chuckled again. “I’ll be fine… I’m just tired,” she said before going silent, drifting off to sleep for the rest of the ride.

_I still can’t believe I did all that tonight,_ I thought to myself. _Nothing wrong with having a bit of fun… My parents would totally freak out if they found out about everything I’ve done in university!_

I smirked. _I’m no longer innocent little Cody. I’m living my life the way I want—and this is my first step in becoming a real adult._

At least, that’s what I told myself. But I could tell for sure that this was the start of me going through some _serious changes_ in my life _._

_And how right I was._


	6. Part II - Chapter 5: Kyle

Even though I had fun at the party, after that day I had gone back to sulking in my dorm room and skipping classes. Somehow the breakup with Julian was hitting me harder than I expected even though I thought I was fine. 

Noel and I ended up texting from time to time, but there wasn’t really much of a connection between us. By the end of the year, he apparently ended up getting a boyfriend before we could actually hook up, so I decided to leave him be. 

After finishing the semester and getting a good grade for each of my classes (yes, Julian at  _ least  _ gave me a good mark even though I skipped his classes), I had made the decision to take a break from school and move back home with my parents. I found that I no longer had motivation to continue this program at the moment—not without Julian. 

He was my everything. And now we would never see each other again. 

I told my parents that I was experiencing depression being alone at school, which was true, Julian really broke my heart. But I left the part about Julian out completely. Just being at school made me feel like shit. Even though my parents pissed me off sometimes, all I wanted was to at least sulk in the comfort of my own living room while eating my mom’s homemade food as she hugged me. 

Nia was sad that I was going to go, but I assured her that it wasn’t going to be the last time we’d see each other. We had grown to become such good friends, so we promised each other that we’d stay in touch and see each other again someday.

And so, I ended up moving back in with my parents, spending most of my time alone crying and sulking, or sitting on the old swing in our backyard just thinking about shit for an hour or two daily. 

Since my parents were worried about me and what my depression would lead to, they suggested that I at least get a part-time job nearby. I decided to at least give it a try if it would take my mind off of Julian. Plus, I’ve been wanting to make my own money.

That’s how I ended up working at the grocery store near my high school. It definitely wasn’t my ideal job, but at least I was earning some money and actually focusing on something other than Julian. I wanted to save up in case I wanted to live on my own in the future. My co-workers mostly consisted of older women and men ranging from just a few years older to triple my age, and a few high-schoolers working with me as well. There was even this one co-worker I had who was a younger girl who had an obvious crush on me, and she would blush furiously and get tongue-tied whenever I was around.

My nineteenth birthday ended up rolling around in February, and Nia actually drove out to see me, which meant a lot to me. We spent the day eating food before driving up to a nice spot I knew about where we could have a nice view while we just hung out on the hood of her car and had a deep conversation. It was nice. I definitely preferred it over celebrating my birthday with a party.

My parents were surprisingly nice to Nia, even though I thought they were going to lecture me about how I shouldn’t be hanging around girls. But no, after I came home from spending the day with Nia, they told me that they were glad that I found a close friend to keep me company while I was at school.  _ Not _ the reaction I expected. 

I became quite popular on  _ Flumblr,  _ I had actually reached over twenty thousand followers! It made me feel more confident about myself, and knowing I had a lot of fans really made me happy. Seems a lot of people  _ really _ like my face. 

Well… Not just my face. 

Because of how popular I became on  _ Flumblr,  _ a lot of people had been leaving me suggestive messages. Even though I’d usually just raise a brow at those kinds of comments, it somehow raised my self-esteem that a lot of people wanted to admire me in  _ that _ way. 

I liked it. I wouldn’t ever outwardly admit it, but I loved the attention. People on the internet  _ loved  _ me.

And me, going through my rebellious phase ever since getting dumped, decided to sign up for a site called  _ LiveDream,  _ where I began doing camboy work _. _ It took me a long time to think it over before I began doing it—but I had convinced myself that it wouldn’t hurt to try it out. So many people wanted to see if I was  _ more  _ than just a pretty face, so I wanted to show them what else I could do. And so, on weekends when I was alone, I’d set up my webcam in my room and get to work.

Usually I was bad at talking to people—but it was somewhat easier for me to communicate with others without having to talk to them face-to-face. So having a live chat where people could just send messages and have me respond to them out loud was good for me. I even thought it was helping my speaking skills a bit, too.

It started off fairly innocent. I wasn’t the kind of camboy who would spread my asshole out on camera for people to see all the way up my colon, but rather I liked to  _ talk  _ to my viewers, fully clothed. Maybe tease them a bit, flirt with them or roleplay with them, and if they wanted me to, I’d jerk off while I was streaming. I wouldn’t show anything, but people seemed to love just seeing and hearing me get off. 

And if they  _ really  _ liked it, they would virtually tip me. Ah, the age of the internet. So many ways to earn some cash without even having to leave the house. 

I got more and more popular on both  _ Flumblr  _ and  _ LiveDream,  _ gaining new fans on both platforms. It made me happy that so many people liked me and wanted to watch me do dirty things. Over time, I slowly would do  _ more  _ for my viewers, from taking off my shirt and playing with my nipples to attempting to deepthroat various long vegetables, even to laying on my bed half-naked and just let my viewers watch me tease myself through my trunks.

I was heavily considering buying a skirt just for my streams, but I felt that it would have been too much of a hassle to buy one for myself and having to explain why I was buying it, plus an awkward  _ “talk”  _ with my parents if they ever found it. And so, I decided to put off buying a skirt to when I’d move out.

Juggling two jobs easily kept me distracted, but somehow, I longed for something  _ more.  _ I didn’t know if maybe what I needed was another relationship like the one I had with Julian—I was still so heartbroken over him that I didn’t know if I would be able to go through something like that again. I was scared if I ever fell in love again that it wouldn’t last, and they would leave. That’s what always happened. 

All I knew is that I wanted  _ something.  _ I didn’t know it yet at the time, but soon a certain  _ something  _ was definitely coming my way.

* * *

I was scheduled to start my stream soon, already having my laptop all set up at my desk as I checked myself out on screen.  _ I look good,  _ I thought to myself. The lighting in my room was just right.  _ Hopefully, my viewers think so, too.  _

My parents were at work and I knew what time they came home, so I had a good schedule to keep for my streams. 

I waited until the countdown hit zero before I clicked the  _ ‘GO LIVE’  _ button, the chat room being filled with greetings as I waved at the camera. “Hey, everybody.”

A lot of users complimented me on how I looked, even though I was just wearing a plain blue T-shirt. “Thank you, everyone,” I said, referring to all the compliments. 

A few users asked me how my week was going and my plans for the weekend. I tapped my chin. “My week was okay. My weekday job is going alright, I can’t complain if I’m earning money,” I said. “No plans for this weekend other than to maybe stay in and read. If you guys have any book recommendations, you can message them to me on  _ Flumblr.”  _

The chat then filled with mixes of book recommendations, users complimenting me and telling me how much they loved me, and users asking me to take my clothes off already. I couldn’t help but chuckle. “Wow, so impatient. You all want to see me nude already, I just got here!” I said playfully. “How about I get started on some foreplay to  _ warm you all up?”  _

I smiled seeing an influx of excited responses in the chat. “Alright. Guess we can do a roleplay.” I ran a hand through my hair as I bit down on my lip, looking down before looking up at the camera again, as if I was checking out the viewer like they were in front of me. I pretended like the viewer had caught me staring and let out a fake gasp before looking away shyly. “S-sorry… I couldn’t help but look at you,” I said innocently, twirling a piece of my hair. “You probably think I’m weird for checking you out, huh?” 

I looked at the chat to see a lot of responses.

_ “No way, ur so cute!!” _

_ “dont apologize. you can look all u want pretty boy ;)” _

_ “ADSGHJOFIDVNJVCKJDS YESSS PLS LOOK AT ME CODY” _

I couldn’t help but smile again.  _ They’re really just eating it up, huh? I’m barely even giving them anything here.  _

I went back into the role of playing a shy stranger. I pressed the pads of my index fingers together in a cute way, looking away from the camera. “W-what? You guys think I’m cute…?” 

Another influx of chat messages with my audience agreeing, further inflating my ego. I giggled. “Then… You wouldn’t mind if I…” I began to raise my shirt, showing off my chest before my fingers lightly pinched at my nipples. “...Played with myself a little bit?” 

I checked that chat again to see the audience basically begin freaking out, many spamming emoticons with heart eyes or drooling faces. I smirked before rubbing my nipples between my fingers, sighing as I bit down on my lip. “Mmm… Do you like it when I touch myself like this?” 

_ “Yes!!!!” _

_ “Show us more pls”  _

_ “love it, keep playing with urself baby” _

_ “SO SEXY HOLY FUCK♡” _

I continued to let my fingers play with my nipples as I let out soft little whimpers and moans, my face blushing as I looked at the camera with a demure look. Even if it was just acting, I still felt shy pleasing myself on air for tons of people to see. 

“Nnn… You’re starting to get me all worked up, I can feel myself growing  _ down there,”  _ I said breathily, my right hand sliding down to my crotch to palm myself through my shorts while my left hand continued to play with my hard nipple. 

My eyes scanned the chat as people were excitedly spamming the chat with compliments, encouraging me to keep touching myself or to go even further.

So I decided I’d go all the way, because  _ why not.  _ My viewers wanted to see me get off, like they always did. 

I leaned over to the side of my desk to pump some lotion into my hand before sliding it under my waistband to grab my dick. I pulled down my shorts and trunks before I began to stroke myself. Even though it didn’t show under my torso on screen, you could see my arm moving as the sound of slippery lotion could be heard with each stroke I gave myself. I ran my thumb over the slit of my cock, making me softly moan.

I moved my hand more, squeezing my cock and stroking faster as I sighed, closing my eyes and imagining myself being bent over a table and getting fucked. I didn’t know by who, but I imagined that they had a nice big cock to slam into me and ruin my tight ass, making me take their big dick as they kept slamming into my prostate over and over again as the table shook, and I’d be a drooling, moaning, submissive mess. 

_ Fuck, I’m really getting hard,  _ I thought to myself as I whimpered out loud, continuing to please myself with my hand as I indulged myself further into my fantasy.

I felt like such a damn  _ slut.  _ And I  _ liked  _ it. I’m sure my viewers were loving it, as well. I wasn’t even paying attention to the chat anymore, but rather just losing myself in my own pleasure, jerking myself to the thought of being used for my body, knowing people were watching me and probably getting off, too. 

“Shit,” I breathily let out as I continued to stroke myself faster. I parted my lips and kept letting out whines and moans. I imagined myself getting flipped over the table, as the imaginary man would look down at me and admire how cute and submissive I was for him. Even though I didn’t know exactly whose face it was, I just knew that he was incredibly handsome. He would lick his lips and call me pretty, call me a good boy, grip my thighs and ram his cock in me as he thrusts back and forth.

My hand was stroking at full speed now, nothing but the sounds of slippery slaps and my whimpers of pleasure filling the room. I used my left hand to reach for some tissues from the tissue box next to me. I knew I was going to cum soon, it would just take a little bit more to send me over the edge. I imagined the man fucking me in my fantasy slamming himself against me, burying his cock in my insides as I feel his dick pulsate and ejaculate all of his seed inside of me. 

I leaned my head back and cried loudly in an exaggerated way, squeezing my cock as I came into the tissues, my mind and body in complete bliss for a good few seconds. All that work for a short moment of  _ paradise.  _

I took a moment to take a deep breath and calm down before rolling the tissue into a ball and tossing it into my trash bin. I looked over at the chat to see everyone  _ losing their shit,  _ people calling me either a ‘good boy’ or a ‘naughty whore.’ Many people seemed to be  _ very  _ pleased with my performance. I smiled seeing all the positive responses from my audience. 

“I’m so glad you enjoyed watching me, everyone,” I said with a little bow before reaching over to the hand sanitizer next to the lotion to pump some into my hands, rubbing my hands clean until they were dry. “I know, that was a bit short, huh?” I slightly raised my hips and pulled up my trunks and my shorts. “How about after I go take a short break, I’ll come back and chat with you all, okay?” I said with a playful wink before pausing my stream and standing up with a sigh. 

I walked to the bathroom to wash my hands, trying to rid my hands of the filthy things I did with them as I watched the soapy water circle down the drain. 

I turned off the tap and dried my hands, taking a look at myself in the mirror. I truly had a face that some people would  _ die  _ for. Sometimes I didn’t know if it was a blessing or a curse. But I didn’t care. I might as well use it to my advantage, right?

I walked down the hall to the kitchen to get a mug and some tea before pouring hot water from the kettle, as I had turned it on before streaming.

I returned to my bedroom with my tea and sat down before I unpaused my stream, waving at the camera. “I’m back,” I said before reading the chat. People were welcoming me back, and I even got a donation from somebody. 

I smiled. “Thank you so much for your twenty-dollar donation,  _ PlantFather06 _ , I appreciate that so much,” I said, before blowing a kiss at the camera. It always felt so  _ nice  _ that people thought I was pretty enough to throw money at without me barely doing a thing.

I decided to stay online and talk to my audience for a little while, getting to know them a little bit. Sometimes it was interesting to hear what other people’s lives are like. I always loved a good story. 

And so I spent the rest of the evening sipping tea and getting to know some of the people in the chat who have been following me for a while. I learned about one of my followers who was apparently a twenty-year-old who was living with his boyfriend after his parents kicked him out for finding out he was gay. It was sad to hear that, and I began to worry about how my parents would react if they ever found out about me being gay. I just hoped to  _ God  _ that they would never find out about the things I do online. And I sure hoped they would never find out about Julian and I.

Before I knew it, it was early evening, and my parents would have been coming home soon. I said goodbye to my viewers before logging off and closing my laptop, grabbing my phone before laying down on my bed to continue reading an ebook I rented online. It was called  _ Boy Cupid,  _ which was a gay romantic comedy about a boy who has been playing matchmaker for his friend all his life, setting him up with different girls all throughout their lives, until he realizes that  _ he’s  _ in love with his friend. It was cute and had the right amount of wit in its dialogue that made for an entertaining story. I always enjoyed a nice love story.

I wondered if I could have a love story like that. Probably not, but there’s nothing wrong with wishing something like that could happen to me. 

I wonder if I even  _ deserved  _ to have a love story like that. Daniel and Julian taught me that love was only temporary, it was something that made me so happy for such a short amount of time… But left just as fast. 

And so, I decided I would make do with  _ temporary.  _

* * *

My parents had come home later that night, and my mother made dinner while my dad watched some sitcom on television. I helped set the table before the three of us ate.

It was mostly silent, but not in a discomforting way. We were all focusing on how well my mother’s cooking was and found the silence peaceful.

“Next weekend is Nathan’s birthday,” my dad said as we ate. “He decided he wanted to throw a small party renting the party room space up at the community centre, and we’ll be going to help him out.” 

I must have automatically rolled my eyes without even realizing after hearing that, as my mother had an annoyed look at her face seeing my response. “Now, Cody, don’t be like that. It’s your brother’s birthday, after all. He even got you a gift for  _ your  _ birthday.”

_ Yeah, ten dollars in a card, how thoughtful of him,  _ I thought to myself. 

“His friends and co-workers will be coming, so dress appropriately and be nice,” my dad said before taking a bite of his dinner. “Don’t wander off somewhere else and be absent for the entire party.”

_ Well shit, there goes my plan to hide in the bathroom and pretend that I was having ‘stomach problems’ while I would actually be scrolling through social media on my phone.  _

“Okay,” is all I responded with before continuing to eat my dinner. 

After dinner, I helped my mother do the dishes before I headed to my room and checked what I could wear to Nathan’s party. Maybe it was silly of me to already prepare my outfit for a party that was  _ next  _ weekend, but I always thought that it never hurt to be ready early. 

I decided on a dark beige sweater vest with a white dress shirt and khakis to match. I set aside the folded clothes in my bottom dresser, where I kept sets of clothes ready to be worn, so that I could easily get changed. As I said before, I wasn’t very stylish, so it wasn’t hard for me to decide what to wear. 

I checked my inbox on  _ Flumblr,  _ seeing a bunch of fanmail from my followers. A lot of them were telling me how much they loved watching my streams or seeing my blog on their timeline, along with some  _ very  _ explicit messages that were more humorous than sexy. 

I sighed as I scrolled through the abundance of mail. Even though I liked getting attention on the internet like this, it had been quite a while since I had sex—I hadn’t been with anyone since I was with Julian. Since I’m such an introvert, I didn’t really go out of my way to meet up with anyone or anything like that. Although I’d  _ like  _ to get topped by a hot guy, the opportunity never came along.

But when the opportunity finally came… I didn’t expect it at  _ all.  _ I never thought I’d do what I did at Nathan’s party and the weeks following. 

* * *

The weekend of Nathan’s birthday party finally came around. I decided to buy Nathan a gift card to the video game store at the mall, since I knew how much he was into that.  _ I’m such a good brother, really.  _

After getting ready and heading out, my parents and I arrived at the community center, bringing in things that Nathan requested we would bring to the party, such as snacks and decorations. 

We got to the party room, and it was fairly small, probably only for a small party with around ten to fifteen guests. Some tables and chairs were already set up, which probably came with renting the space. He and some other guys were setting up the speakers at the other side of the room.

When he turned and saw us, he got up and jogged over. “Hi mom, hi dad,” he greeted our parents, giving the both of them a quick hug. He looked over at me. “Hey, Cody,” he said, gesturing for me to take his hand as we engaged in an awkward bro-hug. 

Turns out the two guys who were already helping Nathan were his university friends who were a musical duo trying to make it in the hip hop industry. Nathan offered them to perform at his birthday party if they helped him set up the party, which they couldn’t turn down. 

I helped decorate the room with my parents as the food Nathan ordered began to arrive. He even got a delicious-looking birthday cake that I couldn’t wait to get into later. My parents seemed very pleased with Nathan for being able to set up such a good party, praising him for being  _ ‘so responsible!’  _ I nearly wanted to puke from how much they gushed over him. 

We took a good half an hour to finish setting everything up before guests began to arrive at the party. There were some guys I’d never seen before who looked kind of nerdy arriving, who Nathan introduced as his friends from the gaming club in university. I rolled my eyes at that, typical Nathan making gaming his priority, but I had to admit, I thought it was impressive that he managed to make some friends in university. 

Two females and two males arrived in a group, who Nathan introduced as his study group in graduate school. That surprised me even  _ more,  _ as I didn’t think Nathan had the capacity to befriend  _ females. _ Maybe I didn’t give him enough credit. 

Some of Nathan’s coworkers from his part-time job came as well, along with a few of his online friends he met through local online gaming. I was actually quite surprised that he had so many friends that did end up showing up. 

I decided to have a drink of soda as I stood against the wall and watched as everyone else socialized with each other. Nathan actually seemed much more social than I remembered. I guess his life has really changed ever since he moved out. 

Another group began to walk in the room, making me look first at their fancy black shoes before my eyes slowly scanned them up.

_ Holy. Fucking. Shit.  _

There stood the trio of Nathan’s childhood friends, the infamous trio consisting of Kyle, Farid, and Eric. It had been so long since I’d seen them—and oh boy, did they  _ seriously  _ have glow ups. They all were dressed semi-formally, and they looked very classy… If I didn’t know they were Nathan’s  _ annoying  _ friends, I probably would have gone and tried to seduce them.

See that? That was my attempt at being funny.

Nathan excitedly jogged over to them as hugs and excited chatter were exchanged amongst them, the four of them taking a moment just to happily catch up with each other. I pulled out my phone and decided to just scroll through _Flumblr._ _I should upload a new selfie later…_ I thought to myself. 

When I looked up from my phone, Nathan had already moved on to talk to some of his other guests, and the trio got some bottles of beer before making their way over to me. I gulped nervously as I clutched onto my phone as if it would protect me, or something.

“Cody,” Kyle’s deep voice greeted with a coy smirk, patting me on the back with a light slap that made me jump. “It’s been a while.” 

“Yeah,” is all I could respond with, feeling small with the three of them in front of me like this. I felt somewhat like I was being cornered by wolves. 

“You sure have grown up,” Farid said with a flashy smile, his teeth blindingly white. “But I still recognize your pretty face.” 

“Tch…” I looked away, suddenly feeling embarrassed.  _ There Farid goes again, teasing me to try and get me worked up. Some things never change.  _

“You do look well, Cody,” Eric said. His voice surprisingly hadn’t changed since I last met him. “It’s really nice to see you. What have you been up to for these past few years?” 

Eric was the one out of the three I could tolerate the most, he had always been polite but a little bit awkward. Still, he was one of Nathan’s friends, so he had joined in the group’s teasing when we were all younger, which left a bad taste in my mouth. “I’m taking a break from school. I’m just working right now.” 

Kyle seemed to raise a brow at the word  _ ‘working,’  _ but the others didn’t seem to react. Eric smiled. “That’s good. What do you do?” 

“I work at the grocery store,” I said before taking a sip of my drink. “The one near my high school.”

“Oh yeah, you went to the same school as Nathan did, right? Okay, I know the one,” Eric said with a nod. 

Deciding it would be rude not to engage back into the conversation, I decided to ask them a question as well. Even though they  _ did  _ give me a bit of a hard time growing up, we were all much older and more mature. I decided I could at  _ least  _ just be nice. “What do you all do?” 

Kyle proudly crossed his arms. “I’m a bodybuilder and gym trainer now,” he said with confidence, as if I would be impressed. He was always a jock guy, so this didn’t surprise me in the slightest. “If you come by the  _ Fitness Frenzy  _ down near the hospital, I can give you a discount.” 

All I did was shrug before Farid cleared his throat and clapped his hands together. “I’m part of a tech company and I actually have a popular  _ HueToob  _ channel,” he said, referring to the most popular video-sharing website on the web. “I have, like, over a hundred thousand subscribers.” 

I just nodded silently before looking at Eric for his answer. “I’m currently training to be an accountant. I hope I’ll be able to start soon,” he said with a light chuckle. “So if you need any financial help, just hit me up,” he said, handing me a business card which I shoved into my pocket.

“Okay,” is all I said before silence fell over all of us. I noticed the three of them were staring at me, especially Kyle, who was clearly eyeing me up and down without any kind of subtlety. Even though I would have rolled my eyes over it, knowing that I had them all looking at me like I was some hot chick inflated my ego a little bit. 

“Hey, you’re like, famous on  _ Flumblr,  _ right?” Farid asked, suddenly making my eyes widen as my heart rate began to pick up.  _ I hope to God they don’t know about my LiveDream account…  _

I just nodded. “Uh, kind of.” 

He smiled. “Nice. You know, it would be cool to have you as a guest for one of my videos. We could use someone with a reputation and face like yours to rake in some views. What do you say?” 

“Huh? Really?” I asked.  _ It wouldn’t be so bad to star in a HueToob video, especially in one made by someone with a lot of subscribers…  _

Farid nodded. “For sure. Here, let me give you my number so I can text you the details sometime,” he said, pulling out his phone. I sighed as I turned on my phone and added Farid’s number to my contacts. I didn’t really  _ want  _ his number in my phone, but it’s basic etiquette to add someone if they want you to, right? I couldn’t just say,  _ “no, I’m good.”  _ I wasn’t that much of an asshole. 

Soon, I heard the loud sound of the mic feedback filling the room as I cringed, as the rest of the room did as well. We all looked at Nathan at the front of the room who nervously smiled. “Sorry ‘bout that.” He cleared his throat. “Thank you, everyone, for coming to my little party,” he said with a little chuckle. “It means a lot to me that you all could make it.”

“We love you, Nathan!” Kyle shouted from next to me, making me wince while everyone in the room laughed. Nathan pointed at Kyle and winked. “Love you too, brother!” 

“Anyways, I don’t want to sound super cheesy, but I want to tell you all that I appreciate each and every one of you in different ways. Thank you especially for the gifts, I never say no to free stuff.”

The room filled with laughter again.  _ When did Nathan become one to crack jokes? Bet he’d been drinking, maybe.  _

“So, yeah. Please enjoy yourselves. Here to perform for you are my two friends Pimp Ricky Shrimp and The Ramen Shaman,” he introduced as the hip hop duo walked onstage, now with bandanas around their heads. They took the mics off the stands as an urban beat began to play from the stereo, and the two began to rap along to the beat. They weren’t  _ terrible,  _ but it just wasn’t really my type of music, I guess. 

The guests seemed to like it, though. They were clapping along and showing positive reactions to some of the lyrics, so good for them. 

After they finished performing, the guests clapped and cheered as they bowed. I finished my drink, feeling like my bladder was full after drinking such a sugary drink. 

“‘Scuse me, I gotta use the bathroom,” I said to the three men who were standing in my way before they moved aside so I could slip out of the party room, throwing out my cup on the way out. 

I looked around the centre to find the bathroom sign pointing around the corner. It seemed to be pretty empty in the community centre, not that I was really complaining. 

I headed down the hall and around the corner to find the men’s bathroom before heading inside. It was a small bathroom with one toilet, two urinals, and a single sink. I walked over to one of the urinals before undoing my pants and doing my business, whistling a jazz tune I had stuck in my head. After I was done, I made myself decent before heading to the sink to wash my hands.

The door of the bathroom opened, and I didn’t bother to look up to see who it was. I finished cleaning my hands before shaking them dry, turning around and gasping to see Kyle standing there in front of me. 

“Jeez, you scared me,” I said as I closed my eyes and exhaled deeply. “Excuse me,” I said to him before stepping aside to walk past him, but he stepped in the same direction as well, blocking my way. I tried to step around him again, but he did the same thing, making me sigh frustratedly. “What’s your problem?” I asked him, annoyed. 

He had a  _ mischievous  _ smile on his face, the same face he would make when we were younger before he was about to blackmail me into doing something that he wanted. He ran a hand through his dirty blonde hair and looked me up and down. “I know about your  _ LiveDream.”  _

I felt my stomach  _ drop  _ as my eyes widened.  _ He… He knows about my account…  _

My immediate reaction was to shake my head and deny it. “I-I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I said quickly. But even as dumb as Kyle was, he wasn’t buying it. “Yeah, right. I know  _ all  _ about the kinds of stuff you’ve been doing, and how would I know this?” He took a step towards me, getting all up in my grill that I felt uncomfortable with how close he was.  _ “I fucking love your streams.” _

I widened my eyes. “You… You watch my streams!?” 

He chuckled. “Sure do. You’re a bit of a slut, aren’t you?” He brought a hand to my face as I flinched. He took my chin and lifted my head to look at me. “How ‘bout you show me what other kinds of things you can do?”

“Grr…” I swatted his arm away. “No way,” I spat before attempting to push past him, but him being the much more fit of us two grabbed me by the shoulder with a single hand and pushed me against the sink as I gasped. 

“Now, I wonder how Nathan would feel if he knew about your little  _ side job,”  _ Kyle said with a smirk, his grip on my shoulder tightening. “And then, I wonder how your  _ parents  _ would feel…”

“You wouldn’t,” I challenged with a glare, but he only laughed. “Well, that depends, I might change my mind if you can  _ convince  _ me.”

“You…” I muttered, knowing some people never change. Kyle was one of those people, an obnoxious and arrogant jerk who would always get his way no matter what the cost was. 

_ Then again, would engaging in some kind of sexual activity with Kyle be so bad? _ I thought to myself, blushing as I looked away.  _ I haven’t had sex in a long while… And it’s not like he’s ugly, he’s actually quite attractive… Ugh, what am I thinking!? It’s  _ Kyle,  _ for fuck’s sake! Nathan’s annoying, stupid jock friend I always knew!  _

But my body was betraying me as it usually was, and I wanted to give in  _ so  _ badly.

“Well?” Kyle asked, becoming impatient. I gulped and closed my eyes for a moment before sighing. “...Fine.” 

“Oh?” 

I turned around, my shaky hands undoing my pants before bending over the sink and pulling down my pants and underwear to my knees to reveal my ass. Having my bare ass exposed, it felt both uncomfortable yet exciting at the same time. I felt incredibly vulnerable. “...You can have me.”

I heard the sound of the bathroom door locking followed by the sound of a belt being undone, before I gasped at the feeling of cold hands gripping my hips. 

“Cute ass,” Kyle murmured, sounding impressed before I felt something rub between my buttocks. It was his dick—he didn’t seem like he was trying to put it  _ inside  _ me, but rather that he wanted to sandwich his cock between my asscheeks.

“How about you give me a nice assjob?” He asked me, making me gulp. I’d never done that with Julian—so I wasn’t sure what I was supposed to do.

“An…  _ ‘assjob?’”  _ I asked curiously. “I don’t know what that is.” 

I saw Kyle roll his eyes in the mirror. “Just grind yourself against my cock. Rub it up and down between your cheeks,” he said, demonstrating by pulling me by my hips as he rubbed his dick against my smooth ass, feeling his warm dick glide up and back down the crease.

“Like that,” he said, as I moved myself back on his cock as I felt it slide up my ass again, making him sigh. “Yeah, there you go, you little whore.” 

Somehow, I thought him degrading me like that was kind of hot. It felt good grinding against him like this, knowing he was getting off to just rubbing his dick against my ass. He chuckled as he aided me with his hands, using me to guide himself as he continued to slide his cock up and down. 

I yelped when I felt him slap my ass as he smirked. “Damn, I fucking love submissive bitches like you on my dick,” he said as he continued rubbing his cock between my asscheeks, his nails digging into my hips. “I always knew Nathan’s pretty little brother would grow up to become a slut.” 

I felt embarrassed and did nothing but gulp and grip the edge of the sink as Kyle just carried on sliding his cock up and down against me. It felt so  _ good,  _ I found myself beginning to let out little whimpers. He took his cock and slapped it against my ass a few times, smiling as I could feel him wipe his precum from his head against my asscheek. “You have freckles on your ass. That’s fucking hot.” 

I felt myself blush as he went back to rubbing his cock between my ass, moaning while rolling his hips into me, one hand feeling snaking up my shirt as I shivered when I felt his hand against the skin of my back. I was getting hard, and I guessed Kyle must have known it as well because he smirked at me in the mirror. “Getting off on this, huh? Take a look at yourself in the mirror while I use you,” he muttered, his hand abruptly gripping at my hair as he tugged on it, making me clench my teeth as I shamefully looked at myself in the mirror, seeing how dishevelled my hair was and how red my face was. Being bent over the sink like this, I truly looked like a certified whore.  _ I can’t believe I’m letting Kyle use me like this… I must be out of my mind, but it feels so good, I don’t want it to stop… _

“Clench your asscheeks,” he instructed before I clenched my ass around his cock, making him curse and roll his eyes back while biting down on his lip. “Feels fucking amazing,” he murmured, rolling his hips into me again as all I could do was grip the edge of the sink harder while he grinded against me. 

I let him take the lead as he controlled me with his tight grip on my hips while he thrusted back and forth, letting his warm cock slide up and down my ass faster now, knowing he was probably coming close to his orgasm from how sloppy his thrusts were becoming. 

“I’m gonna cum on this perfect ass,” he muttered after a few minutes of messy thrusting, continuing to grind against me as we were both letting out moans of pleasure. The pitch of his moans were rising as his breaths became shorter. He plunged into me one more time before pulling his dick back and leaning his head back as he closed his eyes, ejaculating as I felt the warm sensation of cum being splattered across both my asscheeks. 

He took a moment to catch his breath and calm down before making himself decent, pulling out his phone from his back pocket. “Let me take a picture of this. I want to remember it forever,” he said with a smirk before unlocking his phone, pointing the camera at my ass before I heard the sound of the phone camera taking the picture. “Fucking beautiful,” he said, admiring the picture for a few seconds before locking his phone and putting it back in his pocket.

I gulped, feeling the need to speak up. “So, what now?” I asked.

Kyle shrugged. “I don’t fucking know. Go jerk off or something, I don’t care. I’m heading back to the party,” is all he said before unlocking the bathroom door and leaving me there, bent over the bathroom sink with my ass out, covered in semen. 

I sighed deeply before awkwardly waddling over to the bathroom stall, locking it before taking some toilet paper and cleaning my ass.  _ I really just let him do that to me, huh?  _ I felt a bit ashamed, but at the same time, I felt  _ good.  _ I didn’t regret it at all, in fact, it only made me feel more confident about myself.  _ I’m a real slut, aren’t I?  _

I rolled up the toilet paper before throwing it out in the garbage before looking down at my erection with another sigh.  _ Well, guess I’ll just have to take care of this on my own before heading back…  _

* * *

After finishing what I had to do in the bathroom, I headed back to the party room, feeling both guilty yet satisfied at the same time. I just hoped that Kyle would keep his word and  _ not  _ tell Nathan or my parents anything about both my online presence and the acts we did in the bathroom. 

I returned to the party, seeing that everyone had already begun eating. I got some food before I sat down at the table where my parents were and began to eat. 

“You took quite a while in the bathroom, kiddo. You alright?” My dad asked me with a look of concern on his face. 

I just quietly nodded. “Yeah. I’m okay,” is all I said before poking at my food with the plastic fork. 

I looked over at the other tables where everyone else was eating and conversing. I saw the table where Kyle, Farid, and Eric were sitting at, and made sudden eye contact with Kyle—and he just smirked at me and gave me a subtle wink before going back to eating.

I quickly turned back to my food and gulped nervously.  _ Yeah, I definitely am  _ not  _ okay.  _


	7. Part II - Chapter 6: Farid

The rest of Nathan’s party wasn’t bad. The food was good, especially the desserts. Nathan seemed to appreciate the gift I got for him, which was nice. Thankfully, Kyle didn’t bother me for the rest of the party, and it didn’t seem like he had snitched to Nathan or my parents. 

The fact that Kyle was a watcher of my streams, though… I didn’t really quite know how to feel about that. I still continued to do my streams as I usually did, but knowing in the back of my mind that Kyle was probably watching made me feel a little bit weird. 

One day I ended up driving to the gym near the hospital where Kyle worked, since my mom suggested it would be nice of me to hit the gym for a few workouts while I wasn’t at school. 

Yeah, I worked out, alright. Worked Kyle’s dick in my mouth in the locker room and swallowed his load. Then I got his number after that, so I’d say that it was an efficient day at the gym. 

Kyle wasn’t the  _ only  _ new relationship I established. One day while I was working my shift at the grocery store, I was minding my own business and staying at one of the cash registers, waiting for a customer until I suddenly yelped when someone slapped me on the back. 

“Hey, ya!” The person said. I looked behind me to see a dark-skinned boy who was maybe around my age with locs on his head and braces on his teeth. 

“Uh… Hello,” I said, unsure why he was talking to me. He was wearing the same uniform as me, so that obviously meant he worked here.

“I’m Wyatt, I just finished training last week,” the boy said with a sure nod.

I slowly nodded back. “Cool…” 

He took a moment to read my nametag. “Cody, yeah? What school do ya go to?” 

“I’m not in school right now,” I said.  _ What a weird guy.  _

Wyatt nodded again, slightly rocking back and forth on his feet. “Oh, I thought you were in high school. I am. I’m a senior at  _ Arcadia _ ,” he said proudly, pumping a fist in the air. “Can’t wait to graduate this year!” 

“Right…” Is all I said before turning back. 

Somehow, he didn’t get the hint and kept on talking. “Hey well, if you ever need anything, just remember me. Wyatt. W-Y-A-T…” He took a moment to think and make sure he was spelling his own name right. “...T.” 

“Okay,” is all I said before he finally went away to actually do his job. 

A few hours into my shift, I kept seeing that one girl who liked me staring at me from one of the aisles. When I caught her gaze, she’d quickly look away and clumsily go back to stocking the shelves. 

I rolled my eyes before bagging the customer’s groceries. Once it was time for my break, I headed to the back room to go and relax for a bit, until I saw it was Wyatt’s break as well.  _ Great…  _

“Yo, Cody!” He greeted, sitting up and walking over to me to sling an arm around my shoulder. “Yes, just us two bros get to hang out!”

I smiled weakly. 

“So, listen… Since we’re bros, you gotta help me out,” Wyatt said, pulling back and seeming to be a bit more serious. He walked over to open the door, beckoning me to come over. I sighed and walked over to him to see what he wanted to show me. He gestured to the girl who was stocking the shelves, the one who had a crush on me. “That girl over there… I like her,” Wyatt said with a goofy smile as he scratched the back of his head bashfully. “You’ve been working here for a while, right? What’s she like?”

I shrugged. “I don’t know. I don’t talk to her.” 

“Aw, come on, man…” Wyatt waved his hand dismissively. “You don’t even know her name? Throw me something, here!”

I shook my head. “If you want to know about her, why don’t you just talk to her?” I asked, as if pointing out the obvious. 

Wyatt laughed nervously before holding his hands behind his back, shifting side to side anxiously. “I’m worried she’ll think I’m lame.”

_ She wouldn’t be wrong,  _ I thought to myself. 

“You’ll help me, right? You’re a handsome guy, you must know a lot about getting girls.” 

I nearly burst into laughter right there. “I’m not into girls.” 

“Oh,” Wyatt said, taking a moment to think. “Well, don’t gay guys usually know a lot about girls? You would know a lot about, like, clothes and makeup and all that, right?”

“I’m outta here,” I said, deciding to have my break somewhere else far away from this weird kid despite him calling after me. 

* * *

That shift with Wyatt had me  _ exhausted  _ by the end of the day. Not only did his stereotypical comment about my sexuality kind of put me off, but the store got pretty busy after my break, too. I tried to tell myself that Wyatt was just a typical straight high school boy who didn’t mean any harm, but that didn’t mean that I particularly wanted to see him again.

When I got home all I wanted was a hot shower and a nap. After I had both of those things, I changed into something comfortable before I went to my room to flop into bed and scroll through  _ Flumblr  _ on my phone. I had posted a selfie set earlier of me in the bathroom mirror wearing my work uniform. Even though it was a lazy set of photos where I barely did anything to look good, my followers seemed to love it anyway. 

Soon, I got a text from Farid. I went into the messages app to see what it said. 

_ “Hey, Cody. This is Farid, you know, Nathan’s favourite friend in the entire world. Hope you don’t mind, but I got your number from Nathan. Anyway, I was wondering if you were still interested in starring in one of my HueToob videos. If you are, text me back. If you aren’t, text me back. If you can’t decide right now and need more time to think it over, TEXT ME BACK. Please don’t leave me on read, I don’t think I’d be able to handle getting R-bombed by such a cute boy. Thank you,”  _ the message said, with a smiley face emoticon at the end. 

I almost forgot all about that proposal Farid offered back at Nathan’s party. I took a moment to think.  _ Hmm… I’m actually kind of interested in doing it,  _ I thought to myself.  _ I don’t really like Farid, but I also don’t think I want to pass up on an opportunity like this to get some exposure…  _

I pulled up my phone’s keyboard to begin typing out a message.  _ “Thanks for texting me, Farid. I’m still interested in doing a video together. Let me know the details so we can plan something,”  _ I typed out before hitting  _ ‘send.’  _

I watched as the little bubble in the corner of the screen that indicated that the person was typing kept bouncing up and down. After about a minute or two, Farid responded. 

_ “HEEEEYYYY thanks for texting back,”  _ the message said with a bunch of smiley-face emoticons.  _ “Okay, so I got an idea for a video for next Friday. How about meeting at around 11 AM? We can meet at my apartment. Don’t worry, I’ll be having a crew over who will help me with my filming, so unfortunately we won’t be alone,”  _ followed by a crying emoticon before he sent the address of his apartment. 

I sighed before sending a thumbs up emoticon as a confirmation message.  _ I wonder how this will turn out…  _

* * *

The Friday of filming finally came around. I didn’t know what I was supposed to wear, so I stuck with my usual springtime style consisting of a T-shirt and jeans. I pulled up the address to Farid’s place on the GPS on my phone as I got in my car, following the directions as I drove my way there. 

He lived in a metropolitan city about half an hour away from where I lived. Finding his apartment was a bit difficult with  _ so  _ many similar buildings everywhere I’d look. Not to mention the traffic was awful, too. 

I finally reached the high-rise apartment building where Farid said he lived, trying to find an empty spot in the parking lot. Once I finally found one and parked my car, I walked to the entrance of the building and called Farid on my phone. After not even two rings, he picked up. “Hey, Cody! Are you here?” 

“Yeah,” I said, looking up at the building. It certainly was tall. 

“Nice. I’ll open up the door for you. Head up to the twentieth floor and look for apartment number twenty-twenty-two,” he said, before I heard the sound of the building’s front door unlocking. “Alright. See you then,” I said before hanging up, opening the door and heading to the elevators, waiting for the elevator to come down. It was a pretty classy looking foyer, definitely a modern apartment complex for those who had to be making quite a bit of money.  _ Farid must be a bit loaded to afford to live somewhere like this.  _

The elevator finally came, and I headed inside before pushing the button for the twentieth floor. Even the elevator was a bit classy.

The elevator arrived at the floor and opened up before I headed down the halls, looking for Farid’s apartment. When I finally found it, I took a moment to take a deep breath before I knocked on his door. 

Farid answered right away, dressed in a stylish jacket. He smiled at me. “Cody! So glad you’re here. Come on in,” he said, moving aside to let me in. I nodded before entering, my eyes widening at how nice Farid’s apartment was. He had a bit of a minimalistic yet modern taste from the way he designed his apartment. Near the back where the balcony was were cameras and more filming equipment being set up by a few guys.

He laughed seeing my expression. “You seem so surprised at how nice it is,” he said. I shrugged. “I didn’t expect that someone like you would be able to afford such a nice place like this.”

“Damn, you sure are honest,” he said with a smile. “If you want to know, I’m in a really good position with the tech company I work with. Filming videos for my channel is part of my work.” 

“I see,” I said.  _ I wonder what kind of video we’ll be filming,  _ I thought to myself. 

He clapped his hands together. “Well, let me introduce you to the guys,” he said, bringing me over to where his crew were setting up for the video. He spoke to them in what I assumed to be arabic, before turning to me. “Cody, meet my crew who help me with all my  _ HueToob  _ videos,” he said as they all waved and greeted me. I nodded back at them. 

One of the men talked to Farid for a moment before Farid nodded. “You ready to film, Cody?” Farid asked me.

“Ready to start whenever,” I said. “I just don’t know what I’m supposed to do. I don’t know what kind of videos you make.” 

“Ah, okay. Well, it’s pretty simple, we’re doing drop tests of the newest brands of phones to see how durable they are. We also do drop tests with different levels of protection on the phone, such as cases, a phone inside a block of ice, or a phone covered in rubber… Stuff like that. Just be hype about what we’re doing, like you’re having the time of your life.”

_ Huh, that’s the kind of stuff he does? I always thought those kinds of videos were silly, but I guess it’s making him good money,  _ I thought to myself. I nodded back at him. “Okay. I’ll do my best.”

Farid talked to one of the crew members before they left to go down to the impact spot to film there. He brought me over to the balcony before instructing his crew as they finished preparing everything so that we could start filming the video. He pulled out his phone to check how his reflection looked, running a hand through his hair. “Alright, ready to go,” he said before putting his phone back in his pocket. 

The cameraman began to count down with his fingers. “In three… two… one…” 

Farid straightened his jacket and smiled. “He-llo, all my fans and friends from near and far! Today we will be doing a-nother round of phone drop tests, testing out the new  _ Obsidian X 720.  _ And I have a guest with me today who will be helping me out, Cody Vale!” 

The camera then pointed at me and I smiled. Somehow, having a camera on me felt natural after all the times I’ve been streaming.  _ Just play the role, Cody…  _ “Heya. I’m Cody. Thank you for inviting me, Farid.” 

He moved next to me. “Mmhmm. You’re on  _ Flumblr _ a lot, aren’t you?”

“That I am,” I said with a nod. 

“Nice. Very nice,” he said before smiling at the camera again.

“Alright, cut.” The cameraman said before gesturing for one of the other crew members to bring over the phone. One of them came over and presented the phone to us, handing another camera to Farid so he could take a high quality shot of the phone with the sun reflecting off of it for the thumbnail. 

After he was done, he put down the camera and took the phone and handed it to me. The phone was surprisingly thin and light. “So, when I tell you to, you hold the phone over the balcony and drop it. Try to drop it in front of the cameraman down there,” he said, gesturing towards the cameraman down at the parking lot below as, seeing him wave from down below. 

I nodded. “Alright.”

The cameraman started counting down again before beginning to film. “Alright, here in Cody’s hand is the new  _ Obsidian X 720,”  _ Farid said, taking my arm and holding it up to show off the phone in the shot. I didn’t know why, but his strong grip on my arm felt kind of…nice. 

“He is going to  _ drop  _ it down, from  _ this  _ balcony that’s over two hundred feet from the ground!” He said excitedly to the camera as he pointed down at the parking lot below. “Get ready to see some action!” 

He let go of my arm and smiled. “Alright, ready, Cody? Hold it over the railing and drop it on the count of three, ‘kay?” He said, and I nodded in confirmation. “Got it.” 

“Alright, one… two… three!”

Just like that, I released the phone from my hand, widening my eyes as I watched it quietly drop all the way down from the balcony, right down until I heard the sound of the impact when it hit the ground. 

“Awesome job, Cody,” Farid said to me as he raised his hand for me to high five him. “Now, we wait for the runner to come back with the phone, and we’ll see the damage.” 

We waited a few minutes for the runner to come up and give us the phone, as Farid took it and hyped up the damage to the camera. “Look at all that,” he said, pointing to the shattered glass and the plastic that had cracked and broke off of the back of the phone, exposing the insides. “As you can all see, all of that on the side had come off, and the glass is completely cracked,” he said as the camera zoomed in on the parts he was specifying. He tried to turn it on, and surprisingly, it was still working. “As fragile as the  _ Obsidian  _ may be, it sure can survive a twenty storey drop.” 

The rest of the filming was surprisingly a lot of fun. We had done drop tests with different materials protecting the phone, such as different cases, a phone wrapped snugly with saran wrap, and even a phone covered in slime. Somehow letting my frustrations out by breaking technology was kind of relieving. I could tell Farid and the rest of the crew were having a good time, as well. 

We finished recording everything and all that was left was the editing to be done, but Farid said he usually edited his videos on his own. He ordered food for everybody and we all had a delicious lunch together in Farid’s living area before Farid thanked them and sent them on their way.

Then it was just Farid and I sitting next to each other on his couch. Farid was scrolling on his phone, seemingly tired after filming. Although it would have been rude to just leave right then, I didn’t want to sit in awkward silence.

“So, what now?” I asked, patting a rhythm on my lap. 

Farid looked up from his phone. “Sorry, Cody. I got caught up in checking how well my last video did.”

“This is all you do for your job? Drop phones off of balconies?” 

He chuckled. “No, not all. I’m an engineer at my tech company. The whole ‘dropping phones off of balconies’ stuff is part of it, though.”

I nodded. “I see, I was just wondering if you could afford  _ all of this,”  _ I said, gesturing to around his apartment, “...with just what you make off of  _ HueToob.”  _

“Ah, no. I do get paid quite a bit for both jobs, though.” His teeth were so  _ white. _

“Do you live alone?” 

He seemed to become slightly flustered at my question. “Yeah, I live alone.”

“None of you in Nathan’s friend group are married yet, huh?” 

He chuckled. “Well, you probably know what I’m like, Cody. I’m a flirt, I’m always bringing someone back here almost every night.” 

I smirked. “You sleep around with a lot of women?”

“You could say that,” he said with a wink, making my heart skip a beat. “Not just women. I swing both ways, so I get some men over here too.”

_ Oh, is that so?  _ I raised a brow. I wondered to myself if he was telling me all this to flirt with me, but Farid had always been all about oversharing. 

_ He really  _ is  _ handsome… I actually find that he’s grown and changed since we were young.  _

Farid stared into my eyes. “You know, you’ve really grown up, Cody… It’s really amazing.”

I snorted. “That’s how aging works. It’s not some kind of phenomenon.” 

“I know, but…” Soon I felt his hand touch my knee. “You’ve always been good-looking. It’s just that you’ve really grown into such a handsome man.” 

I looked down at his hand and felt my heart begin to pick up its pace.  _ So… He really is hitting on me, huh?  _ I looked back up at him. “I could say the same about you.” 

“Yeah?” I watched as his hand slowly moved up my thigh. He licked his lips, moving close to my ear. “Just let me know if you want me to stop.” 

And that was the thing, I  _ didn’t  _ stop him. I just let him palm at my crotch, making me sigh while he slid off of the couch and got down on his knees in front of me. He reached under my sweater, his fingers undoing the front of my jeans. I could only blush and watch him as he smirked up at me, pulling down my pants and underwear together before setting them aside. 

I was surprised he wanted me to be completely nude from the waist down. He motioned for me to bend my knees upward and hold them, feeling shy as I did so, shivering from the breeze from the window making contact with my asshole. 

He sighed as he spread my legs, pressing his lips against my inner thigh before he began peppering kisses all over the skin. I couldn’t help but slightly whimper at the feeling of his soft lips leaving kisses against me, teasing me, getting me worked up. 

“Your skin is really soft and pale… I can see where I kissed you,” he said, showing me the marks on my inner thigh. He gave the same treatment to my opposite thigh, leaving kisses and small nips against the skin there, continuing to tease and caress me. 

Soon, he took my cock and spat onto it before he took it into his mouth, beginning to suck on the tip before quickly moving down to fit the entirety of my cock into him, making me lean back and moan.  _ Wow, he must have a lot of experience,  _ I thought to myself.

He looked up at me with a wink before moving his warm, wet mouth up on down on my cock, slurping loudly. He began slowly, but would speed up, and smoothly transition between the two speeds, much to my pleasure. 

I closed my eyes and let out soft moans as Farid continued to suck my dick. I enjoyed giving head, but  _ receiving  _ it was completely out of this world. I could hear the faint sounds of the city in the distance from the open window, another breeze passing by.

My cock was hardening in his mouth as he continued to suck me off. He popped off of my dick with a loud popping sound before jerking me in his hand. “Can I rim you?” He asked me, tugging and stroking my dick.

I didn’t know what  _ ‘rimming’  _ was, but I just nodded, assuming that whatever he suggested would feel good. He moved down and I could feel him spread my hole open, widening my eyes and covering my mouth when I felt his warm tongue probing at it. “N-nn…!” 

Farid hummed pleasantly in response, licking at the hole and swirling his tongue around the ring of flesh before he pushed his tongue inside me. I gasped and clenched my fingers as his tongue wagged within me, his fingers pressing into my thighs.

_ So, this is what  _ ‘rimming’ _ is? It feels amazing…  _

He continued exploring my insides with his tongue before he pulled it out from me. “Your boy pussy is delicious,” he murmured breathily before going back in to eat me out again. 

It felt so good, so  _ fucking  _ good getting eaten out like this, almost like a girl. I ran a hand through his hair as he moved back to spitting on and sucking on my cock again, which was now nice and hard. 

He alternated between sucking me off and eating me out, a heavenly balance between the two.  _ God,  _ I felt like I was on cloud nine being pampered like this with Farid’s mouth. The feeling of his warm mouth on me and his close-shaved stubble rubbing against my skin, it was all so much.

After a few more minutes of Farid pleasing me, I felt like I was quickly getting closer and closer to my climax. “Nnn… Hey, I’m getting close…” 

Farid just continued to suck me off faster, moving his mouth up and down quickly like he really was a pro. My grip in his hair tightened as my body tensed up, my toes curling as I felt myself reach my orgasm.

I felt Farid swallow around my cock, taking my cum down his throat. He kept eye contact with me the whole time, then winked at me when I finished. 

_ Fuck.  _

He pulled his mouth off of me before handing me back my clothes. I quickly put my trunks on in embarrassment as he chuckled. “How was it?”

I blushed. “...Good,” I mumbled quietly. He smiled at me as I put my jeans back on. “I liked it too,” he said, watching me as I dressed up and straightened out my clothes. “You have my number, so if you ever want to do more, call me anytime,” he said with a wink and a smile of his white teeth again. 

“Alright,” is all I said before I decided it was time for me to head back home. “I guess I’ll see you around.” 

“Yeah. Take care. Thanks for coming over to film with me today… What we just did is just my way of saying ‘thank you,’” he said with another wink. “I meant what I said, Cody. You’ve really grown up. If you ever want to film a  _ different  _ kind of video together, hit me up.”

I blushed and mumbled a  _ ‘bye’ _ before I made my way back down to the parking lot to get into my car and head back home. 

While on the freeway, I couldn’t help but think about what Farid and I had done.  _ We really had a quickie after filming, huh? I’m really just letting anyone fuck me. I must be desperate…  _

I smirked to myself.  _ But then again, I liked it. I like being admired, I like getting off and getting other people off. Where’s the harm in that if we’re being careful?  _

I thought about how I’ve been led to believe growing up that any kind of sexual activity were grave sins.

_ Well baby, I’m a sinner,  _ I thought to myself as I turned up the car radio, singing along to a funky jazz tune.

* * *

Farid texted me a few days later to let me know he was done with the editing process, and that he would upload the video at the very moment. I was at work at the time, so I wasn’t able to watch the video yet until my shift was over.

I finished bagging a customer’s groceries before they left, and I saw Wyatt strutting over to me.  _ Oh, great…  _

“Hey, Cody,” he greeted with a brace-filled smile. “How’s it hanging? Did you watch that basketball game last night? Man, crazy stuff.”

“I don’t watch sports,” I said. 

He smiled weakly before clearing his throat, holding onto the edge of the counter and rocking back and forth on his feet. “So, I actually came over here to apologize for what I said last time we talked,” he said, referring to  _ that  _ comment he made. “It was rude of me, so I wanted you to know that I’m sorry, man.” 

_ Huh… As annoying as he may be, I appreciate that he went out of his way to apologize to me.  _ “Thanks, that’s nice of you,” I said with a nod. 

“I’m gonna try harder to be a better friend to you, Cody. To make up for it, I’ll work your next shift,” he said as he flexed his arm. I shook my head. “You don’t have to do that—”

“But I  _ will,  _ as long as you help me,” he said with a smile. “You know… With that girl.” He looked over at the shy girl who was stocking the shelves again. 

I sighed and rolled my eyes.  _ He’s still going on about this?  _ “Alright, fine. I’ll help you. But don’t expect much out of me, I’m not really that good with people,” I explained. 

He just smiled. “No problem, just having you there with me is all I need,” he said with a sure nod. I closed my cashier lane before two of us walked over to the girl, who seemed to freeze up when she saw us walking towards her.

Wyatt smiled at her. “Hey, there. I’m Wyatt, I just started working here recently,” he said proudly. “My buddy here is somewhat of a mentor to me, so he’s showing me the ropes. So I thought, ‘hmm, what’s a tour of the store without introducing myself to the most eye-catching thing here?’” 

I knit my eyebrows in confused bewilderment.  _ This is painful to watch.  _

The girl just played with the ends of her hair, blushing wildly as she tried to look away from me. “N-nice to meet you… I’m Katelyn,” she said quietly. 

“That’s a really pretty name. How old are you, Katelyn?” 

She gulped, still playing with her hair nervously. “S-sixteen…” 

“Wow! That’s cool, I’m seventeen,” Wyatt said as he grinned wider. He nudged me and I sighed. “I’m Cody, and I’m nineteen.” 

She seemed to become somewhat disappointed after hearing my age, as if her chances with me had diminished in her mind.  _ It’s a shame her chances with me were doomed from the beginning.  _

“What school do you go to, Katelyn?” Wyatt asked her. 

_ “Lady Clair,”  _ she quietly said, referring to the all-girls school that was in our city. I knew about it because I’d always overhear Nathan's friends talk about girls from that school back then. 

“So cool,” Wyatt said with a nod. “Maybe I should transfer there.”

“It’s an all-girls school,” I informed him, and he blushed in embarrassment, scratching his neck. “W-well… What I meant was that  _ if  _ I was a girl, I’d transfer there. If they have girls like you there, it must be a pretty great school.” 

I saw Katelyn smile a little bit at that, tucking a piece of her hair behind her ear.  _ Nice job, Wyatt.  _

Even though Wyatt seemed a bit nervous talking to her, he seemed to make her giggle a bit and let her guard down. He would try to use me to help ease the conversation and make it a casual talk between three co-workers.

Eventually, the two spent some time talking to each other like the awkward teenagers they were, and it seemed that me just being there eased Wyatt’s nerves a bit. Although Wyatt did most of the talking, I could catch Katelyn glancing shyly at me from time to time, quickly looking away when I would catch her gaze. 

It wasn’t until one of our managers caught us slacking that we all went back to work. Katelyn seemed to be embarrassed realizing that she was distracting us from doing our jobs, but Wyatt reassured her that she was a  _ ‘beautiful distraction.’  _ So forward… 

The rest of the shift, both Wyatt and Katelyn seemed to be in a lot higher spirits. Katelyn seemed to be smiling a bit more while she worked, and Wyatt seemed to be more chipper than usual. It honestly made me smile.

Finally, my shift was over and I was ready to go home and rest. I clocked out and was about to leave, but Wyatt approached me again. “Hey, Cody… I wanted to thank you for helping me out today, man. Couldn’t have talked to her without you there.” 

I shrugged. “I didn’t really do anything…”

“Still, just knowing you have my back really means a lot,” he said with a smile and a nod. “I owe you, big time,” he said before going back to work. 

I walked out of the store and to my car as I sat and thought about Wyatt and Katelyn. It was nice to see two young people like that, it reminded me of how Daniel and I were… 

I smiled sadly to myself remembering him, touching his bracelet around my wrist.  _ Five years ago… I wonder, Daniel. Do you ever think of me, still?  _

I closed my eyes and leaned back in my seat, taking a moment to breathe as I remembered the times we shared. He was the first person who ever really made me  _ feel  _ something. 

I thought about the way he would smile at me, and how he had beautiful dimples. I thought about how enthusiastic he was whenever I’d talk about myself. I thought about those emails we would send each other, and how he made the young boy that I was so damn happy.

I felt a tear roll down my cheek before I wiped it away and shook my head, trying to get my mind off of it all. I turned on the radio and started my car, driving home, the thoughts of Wyatt and Katelyn on my mind—and the lingering thoughts of Daniel, too. Once I got home I headed straight to the shower before I hit the bed for a snooze. 

Before taking a nap, I checked my phone to see a new text from Farid. 

_ “Have you checked out our video yet? It’s blowing up! People love you!”  _

He attached the link to the video and I curiously tapped on it, opening the video in my web browser. The editing was definitely cheesy, and I cringed at hearing my voice. I  _ did  _ look good, though, as if I was made to be on camera.

I didn’t pay much attention to the video other than the parts where I was featured. I widened my eyes seeing that the video had over four hundred thousand views already. 

I tapped on the comments, curious to see what people had to say.

_ “Awesome video as always, Farid! So interesting to see how durable the new Obsidian phone is. The guest you brought for this video is sooo cute, I’ve never seen him before! He’s really handsome, I hope you bring him back for another video.” _

_ “Great, informative video. Thank you for showing us the strength of the Obsidian. Makes it even better that a cute guy dropped the phone, I’d let him take my phone and drop it off a balcony, too.” _

_ “Anyone got the @ of Farid’s friend???” _

_ “That boy Cody is pretty as hell. No homo.”  _

I wasn’t surprised that a lot of the comments were about me. I didn’t have a  _ HueToob  _ account, but I wondered if I should make one. Maybe one day. 

Someone replied to the comment asking about my social media by excitedly linking my  _ Flumblr  _ profile, exclaiming that they  _ ‘found me’  _ and that my pictures are  _ ‘super hot,’  _ and that reply got well over five-hundred likes.

When I exited the video and opened up the  _ Flumblr  _ app, I saw that I had gained an influx of new followers and comments on my photos. 

_ “Found you from Farid Alqatani’s new video, decided to follow cuz ur cute lol” _

_ “This is the guy from FreshTechFarid’s video!!!! So hot!!!!” _

_ “He looks soooo pretty... Like a girl… haha”  _

I locked my phone before rolling onto my side to relax for another nap, clueless to anything else as all I wanted at the moment was to kick back and have a nice rest. 

If only I knew at the time that video would end up changing my life forever. 


	8. Part II - Chapter 7: Eric

Things had been weird since that video Farid and I made together came out. I got a lot more attention on  _ Flumblr  _ since then, and even some people who followed my  _ LiveDream  _ account saw me on the video. 

The thing was, people who knew me on  _ LiveDream  _ knew me on  _ Flumblr,  _ but not vice versa. I try not to leave much trace of my  _ LiveDream  _ on my  _ Flumblr,  _ as I liked to keep my  _ Flumblr  _ profile public. There wasn’t really any shame in people publicly knowing about my  _ LiveDream,  _ but I didn’t really want people I knew in real life to find out about it, especially my family. It would just be too weird. 

Anyway, I probably racked up about twenty thousand new followers since the video came out, which was absolutely astounding to me. I knew I was good-looking, but being able to have  _ twenty thousand  _ new people want to follow me just for my looks? It felt  _ good.  _

I was working my shift down at the grocery store again, minding my own business and just trying to, ‘get in my bag’ as usual. When it was finally time for my break, I clocked out, ready to go to the staff room… Until I saw Katelyn shyly walking towards me. She had her bangs clipped back, so I could actually see her face. She was actually kind of cute. 

“C-Cody,” she softly said, her face blushing as she averted her eyes from mine shyly, playing with the strap of her shoulder bag. “Hello…” 

“Hey,” I said, pulling my phone out of my pocket to see if I had any missed texts during my shift. I only had one from Nia telling me about something funny that happened to her in class. 

“I was wondering…” Katelyn twiddled her thumbs. “If maybe I could talk to you? In private?” She asked in a quiet voice, tucking a piece of hair behind her ear. “I-If that’s okay with you, of course…”

I raised a brow at her curiously. “Oh? Okay. Let’s go outside,” I said as she nodded eagerly. I walked through the back room to reach the exit at the back of the store. There was a bench outside against the building, where workers who usually took smoke breaks would sit and smoke. But since it was just Katelyn and I outside, we both sat on the bench together.

“What is it?” I asked her. She took a moment to look at the ground and seemed to wonder if she wanted to  _ really _ say what she was going to say.

“Cody, I…” Her cheeks blushed red before tucking her hair behind her ear again before searching for something in her bag. She pulled out a small resealable plastic bag with what looked like to be cookies. She held them up to me. “...I made these for you.” 

I blinked and just stared at it for a moment before taking it from her, it would have been rude not to. “Thank you, what for?”

“I…” She looked up at me with wide eyes. “I really like you, Cody… I just wanted to let you know.”

“Um…” I scratched the back of my neck, not really sure what to say. I tried to quickly think about what would be an appropriate response. I sighed deeply, deciding to just be straight up with her. “I’m only into dudes.”

Her face fell completely, as if I had told her someone  _ died.  _ “Oh…” 

“And even if I wasn’t, you’re too young for me,” I said, and it was almost like rubbing salt into her wounds. It kind of made me pity her. “I’m sorry, Katelyn.” 

She only slowly nodded before twiddling with her thumbs nervously again.

“But you know…” I started, and she looked up at me in interest. “There’s someone I know who would really appreciate cookies from you.”

She tilted her head in curiosity. “Who?” 

I took a deep breath. I couldn’t believe I was about to say it. “Wyatt. He might be kind of on the weird side, but you should give him a chance. He’s a good kid,” I said with a nod. “I know he’d be grateful.” 

“Wyatt, huh?” Katelyn took a moment to think before smiling. “Thank you, Cody… For being honest with me.” 

“Do you want these back?” I asked her, gesturing towards the bag of cookies, but she shook her head. “No, no… I made those for you. Please eat them,” she said with a nod before I nodded back at her. 

Katelyn and I went back inside, and were greeted by a cheerful-looking Wyatt. “Hey, you two! On break?” 

“Yeah, but I’m about to get back,” I said before looking at Katelyn and nodding, leaving her with Wyatt. “See you two later,” I said before leaving the room. 

I peeked through the back room door’s window to see Wyatt talking to Katelyn, and she seemed to giggle at something he said to her. I smiled.  _ They’d be good together,  _ I thought to myself before going back to work.

* * *

A few days later, I collected my laundry into my hamper in my room before bringing it down to the laundry room in the basement. I sorted the clothes by light and dark colours as I usually did, picking up my beige slacks that I wore at Nathan’s party. I checked the pockets before putting it into the lights pile, finding a card in one of the back pockets. 

I looked at the card, seeing it was Eric’s business card at his accounting company. I raised a brow, thinking about some of the memories I had with Eric. When we were younger, even though Eric would tease me along with Nathan and his friends, he was the only one out of all of them who ever took me seriously.

I remembered that he was the one who would tell Nathan and the others when the teasing went too far, or being their voice of reason whenever the four of them got into shenanigans. There were also times before when it was my birthday, and he’d bring me a small present, like even just a candy bar or something. He was a nice guy who just got mixed in with idiots. 

I placed the card aside before doing my laundry, mentally noting to keep it for later.

* * *

My thumb was slightly shaking as I typed out Eric’s number from the card on my phone. I took a moment deciding if I should  _ really  _ do it before actually hitting the call button. It  _ was _ his business number, after all… 

I shook my head and decided to call anyway. I hit the call button and brought my phone to my ear, taking a deep breath as I heard the line ring. 

After two rings, it seemed someone picked up. “This is Eric Chung from  _ The Willowside Company,  _ how may I help you today?” 

I scratched my head. “Uh, hey Eric. It’s Cody, you know, Nathan’s brother.”

“Oh! Hey, Cody!” He said, his voice seemingly full of excitement. “It’s nice to hear from you. What’s going on? You need any financial help?”

“Er… No, not really,” I said, scratching my head. “I actually wanted to know if you’d want to have lunch together sometime.”

“Really?” Eric asked, sounding genuinely surprised. “Like… You, me, Nathan, and the other guys?”

“Um, I was thinking of just the two of us.” 

I heard the sound of some frantic shuffling or something on the other line before Eric answered again. “W-wow, I mean, I’d love to,” he said. “I’m a bit surprised, but I’d like that, Cody. How about I text you later from my personal phone and we can…” He clicked his tongue. “Arrange something?” 

“Sounds good to me.”

Eric chuckled. “Okay, good. Should I text this number?”

“Yeah, this is my phone,” I said. 

“Alright. Then I’ll text you later, okay? Thanks again, Cody. It means a lot that you reached out.”

“Mm-hmm. Bye,” I said before I hung up. I sighed, feeling my heart racing in my chest. I didn’t know why, but somehow just having that phone call made me feel a bit nervous. Definitely not near the intensity of the nervousness I’d feel around Daniel or Julian, but still a bit nervous in a good way. 

_ Are we arranging a  _ date? I asked myself, taking a moment to think before shaking my head.  _ No way… A date with Eric? I don’t want to consider it to be a date, dating Nathan’s friends would be so complicated and just downright weird. _

But still, I had to admit that I was looking forward to whatever Eric was going to plan. 

* * *

A few days later when I was mindlessly scrolling through  _ Flumblr  _ on my laptop, I finally got a text message from an unknown number.

_ “Hey Cody :) This is Eric! Would you still be interested in hanging out together sometime? I know this really great Vietnamese take-out place. I could get some food for us and maybe we could check out Harrington Park?”  _

Then another text followed that one.  _ “Only if you still want to, though. Because if you changed your mind, I don’t mind either. I get it! You probably have a lot going on in your life. :)” _

And then one more text followed  _ that  _ one.  _ “Seriously, don’t feel like you’re obliged to hang out with me or anything like that, because as I said, I won’t be mad if you decide to cancel, promise. But I’m not saying that I want you to or anything! :D” _

I found myself wanting to chuckle at the messages, but it would have been kind of rude to. I knew Eric was a bit of an awkward but still nice guy, and he was probably trying to figure out the nicest way possible to communicate with his friend’s little brother. 

I decided to try and be nice about it.  _ “I’d love to do that with you,”  _ I texted.  _ “I’ll send a picture of my work schedule and we can plan a day together,”  _ I finished typing before sending the message. I went into my phone’s photo gallery before finding a screenshot of my work schedule for this month before sending it to Eric. I waited for his response and when he responded, we planned a day for us to spend time together when we were both off of work. 

Somehow, I felt excited about my day with Eric. But, why? We were just gonna be two dudes hanging out, right? 

_...Right? _

* * *

The day had finally come. I drove out to Harrington Park, which was a fairly large public park in the city that had a lot of space for picnics and outdoor activities and whatnot. When I pulled up to the parking lot, it seemed that there weren't many people at the park on that day. Not that I minded at all, I preferred it when it wasn’t crowded. 

I sat in my car, listening to some jazzy tunes while I waited for a text from Eric when he’d arrive. I didn’t know why I felt a bit nervous, having a picnic seemed like something so  _ intimate,  _ like something that couples who have been dating for a while would do. But this wasn’t a  _ date…  _

After about ten to fifteen minutes, my phone chimed. I checked it to see a new message from Eric.  _ “Just parked at Harrington Park. Are you here already? I’m hanging out outside my car.”  _

I locked my phone before putting it in my pocket, heading out of my car before I locked it. I looked around the parking lot, and sure enough, I saw Eric leaning against his car, which was a modest silver sedan. He looked up and smiled when he saw me. “Hey, Cody!” 

_ He looks good,  _ I thought to myself. I walked over to him and nodded. “Hey.” 

He opened the back door of his car, reaching for something before pulling out two bags which I assumed were take-out. 

“Here, could you take one?” He asked me and I nodded, taking a bag from him as he closed his car door and locked his car with his free hand. “Alright, let’s find somewhere to sit,” he said as he began walking down the park trail and I followed behind him. 

After a few minutes of walking, we found a picnic table to sit at. It was behind a wall of trees that provided a good amount of shade, while it faced an old empty baseball diamond. It was a nice little spot. 

We put down the bags on the table before sitting across from each other at the picnic table. “What did you get?” 

Eric smiled as he began to untie the bags, pulling out different food packages and placing them on the table. “Vietnamese take-out. I wasn’t sure what you’d like, so I got my recommendations. I’m sure you’re gonna love it,” he said cheerily. 

After he arranged all the food on the table, he explained to me what each container had inside. When he opened the packages, the food was unfamiliar to me, but smelled and looked delicious nonetheless. The food seemed to still be hot, and I couldn’t wait to dig in. 

Eric handed me a paper plate and plastic utensils before getting some for himself. I tried all of the different foods, and they were really delicious! I never tried anything like that before, as it was my first time trying Vietnamese food. There was something I especially loved, some kind of stuffed pancake. 

“What is this? I love it,” I said to Eric as I ate it. I could taste the richness of the pork and the tang of the shrimp.

He wiped his mouth with a napkin before smiling at me.  _ “Banh xeo,”  _ he said with a nod. “It’s good, huh? I’m glad you like it. That’s my little sister’s favourite, too. She always orders it whenever we go to this restaurant.” 

“I didn’t know you had a sister,” I said curiously. The two of us continued to eat. There was a question that had been lingering in my mind that I’d been meaning to ask him, but I thought it would be too awkward to ask. 

_ I might as well just ask him. He’s a nice guy, I’m sure he wouldn’t make fun of me like the rest of Nathan’s other friends. _

“Um… Kind of a weird question, but why did you take me here for a picnic?” I asked him. “It just seems a bit…  _ intimate.”  _

Eric’s cheeks flushed pink as he nervously laughed. “Oh, s-sorry, Cody… I noticed that since you’ve always been the quiet type, you would probably want to hang out somewhere that isn’t too crowded or loud,” he said with a nod. “I usually prefer going to places like this, but I just never really had anyone else who would appreciate it like I do. So… When you asked me if I wanted to hang out, I just assumed that you would probably want to do something like this… But I’m really sorry if I was wrong,” he said, beginning to become flustered. 

I shook my head and smiled. “No, you’re right, I do prefer going somewhere like this where it’s quiet but still out in the open. Thanks for agreeing to hang out with me and bringing me here,” I said, before slurping on some sort of thin noodles.  _ Delicious.  _

He smiled. “I-I’m glad,” he said in relief. “I’m happy you’re enjoying the food, too.” 

I felt happy. I didn’t know if there was something there between Eric and I, but all I knew was that I was enjoying whatever it was that was between us. It was just really nice. 

“If I may ask, though…” Eric cleared his throat. “Why did you ask just me to hang out with you? I don’t mean this in a bad way, but we’ve never really talked much before, other than whenever I came over to your house to hang out with Nathan and the others.” 

I took a moment to ponder over how I wanted to answer this as I bit into what I assumed to be some kind of spring roll. “Out of all of Nathan’s friends, you were the only one who was nice to me,” I said with a stuffed mouth before swallowing my food. “I mean, of course  _ all  _ of you would pick on me, but you… You seemed like you actually gave a shit about me, y’know? Growing up, I’d never forget the times when you’d tell the others when the teasing would go too far or when you’d get me something small on my birthdays. I never really got to thank you for all of that, so…” I scratched my head sheepishly. “Asking you to hang out was kind of my weird way of thanking you.” 

Eric seemed to blush and smile at my answer. “Well, growing up in a Chinese household, my parents and grandmother raised me to always be respectful to others. They were pretty strict about it too, so I guess they really ingrained the whole ‘respect’ thing in me…” He took another bite of his food. “Or maybe I’m just naturally like that. Either way, I always find joy in making others happy. I always noticed that you were always sort of closed-off and introverted, so getting you a little something on your birthdays to see you smile would make me happy.”

_ He’s such a nice guy, and he’s really handsome, too,  _ I thought to myself.  _ If he wasn’t one of Nathan’s best friends, I’d probably want to try going out with him… That is, if he was into guys. _

We continued to eat our food as I’d ask Eric about the different dishes, and he’d enthusiastically explain them to me. I was actually having a lot more fun than I expected, and I sensed that Eric was feeling the same way, too.

* * *

After we finished our food, we threw out all the disposable containers before deciding to just sit on the grass and talk. I actually felt quite comfortable talking to Eric, as we both were pretty shy. I suppose something about us both being introverts made us feel comfortable with each other. He talked about how his training for his accounting job was going, and it seemed that he was really enjoying what he was doing and where he would go from there. Then he asked me how my job at the grocery store was going, and even though there wasn’t much to say about it, I tried to hype it up as much as I could. I even told him about Wyatt and Katelyn. 

“That’s really nice of you to put them together,” Eric said with a nod and a smile. “I hope they work out.”

“I do too,” I said. “It’s always cute to see kids in love.”

“I agree,” he said. “Speaking of kids in love, what about you? You in love with someone?” He asked with a curious look on his face.

I sighed before looking down, picking a small clover from the grass. “Well… I was,” I said solemnly. “But we broke up last year.” 

“Oh, I’m sorry to hear that,” Eric said sympathetically. “Breakups are tough, huh? I mean, I’ve only been in one, but I know that they aren’t easy.” 

I looked up at him and widened my eyes. “Only one? Really?” I asked. “But… You’re such a nice and handsome guy.”

Eric chuckled. “Thank you, that’s really nice of you to say. But if you haven’t noticed, I’m kind of awkward. I haven’t done more with a girl than kiss her.” 

“No way.” 

Eric seemed to become embarrassed. “It’s true.” 

The two of us were silent for a few moments, before I bit down on my lip and thought about asking him what came to mind.  _ I wonder if he would want to go further… With  _ me. 

“By choice?” I asked him, and he just shrugged. “Well, I guess so. I mean, I’d  _ like  _ to, but… I’ve always just been too awkward to have any…  _ sexual interactions,  _ y’know?” 

“Do you think you’d want to?” I asked, raising a brow. “Maybe… With me?” 

He looked at me with a flushed face. “W-what are you trying to say, Cody?” 

I pulled up my legs and leaned my head against my knees, looking at him with a smile. “I can do something for you if you’d like… I wouldn’t mind being your first, if you want.” 

“Um…” Eric chuckled nervously, scratching the back of his neck. “I-Is this some kind of prank?” 

I shook my head. “No, I mean it. We can do something together right here,” I said as I sat up and shifted closer to him. “If you don’t want to, that’s fine. But it’s just my way of saying  _ ‘thank you’  _ for being so nice to me, back then and now.” 

“You’re saying that so casually,” Eric said as his brows knit and he gulped. “How can you offer it so easily?” 

“Because I like having sex,” I said a bit shyly. “It’s fun. You’re really cute and nice, Eric… So I wouldn’t mind showing you how fun it can be.” 

Eric looked down and seemed to take a good few moments to think over it, mentally debating with himself. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. “Alright… I think I’d want to try. I don’t know what to do, though.” 

I smiled at him. “It’s okay. We can do something simple… How about if I give you a handjob?” 

“S-sure,” Eric said in embarrassment. “Here?”

I nodded. “No one else is around,” I said before I lightly placed a hand on top of his that was in the grass. 

Eric was silent for a few moments before he bit his lip, adjusting himself as I shifted myself to climb over his legs, and nothing more was said as I began to undo the front of his pants, and he helped me pull down the front of his underwear to pull out his thin cock that was had a cute pink head. 

I held myself up with my knees and a hand, spitting into my other hand before reaching between his thighs, grabbing his cock, making his face flush red and his body tense up as he whimpered slightly just from me touching him. I almost wanted to laugh at how cute it was, he was more sensitive than I was!

“Just relax,” I softly said before I slowly started to move my hand that was gripping him, stroking him as he would let out small moans and was breathing heavily. 

I took a look around for a quick moment to make sure there  _ really  _ wasn’t anyone around, it would have been extremely embarrassing for the both of us if someone did see us. Personally, I wouldn’t mind being caught having sex in public—but I didn’t think Eric would. 

I gripped him harder as my hand jerked him, feeling him growing hard with my hand around him. I noticed how Eric would squirm or let out a shaky breath with each pull or drag of my hand, and he would just watch me work my hand on him while he’d grip at the grass in the ground. 

“W-wow, Cody…” Eric breathily let out as I continued jerking him. “I never thought someone  _ else  _ jerking me off would feel so good…” 

I smiled at him. “Yeah, you’re really sensitive too,” I said as I moved my hand faster up and down his cock. “It’s honestly cute.” 

Eric only blushed deeper as he let me continue to work my hand on him, taking a moment to spit into my palm again before going back in to stroke him quickly. He was nice and erect at this point, it was sweet to see his body react so quickly to what I was doing. It was adorable having fun with a virgin like him. His cock felt so slick in my hand, and it glided so easily with each rub.

I flicked my wrist, giving a harder squeeze to every stroke and swiping my thumb over the pre-cum that was leaking from the head. He just kept panting and gripping at the grass, his cock twitching in my hand as I continued to jack him, watching his cute expression on his blushing face. I know he probably felt embarrassed having me do this to him in a  _ public place,  _ but he never told me that he wanted to stop.

I moved my hand faster on him, jerking him at a quick pace, and his breaths were becoming shorter while his moans were rising in pitch. “C-Cody, nn…” He began to desperately thrust his hips up, matching the rhythm of my hand. “I-I feel so good, I feel like I’m… I’m gonna…” 

And with a final twist and flick of my wrist along with a tight squeeze, he came with a moan, spilling his load onto my hand. He looked  _ so  _ cute getting lost in his orgasm, having his first one from someone  _ else  _ touching him. 

He took a few moments to steady his breath and calm himself down. I patiently waited, letting go of his cock, my hand feeling sticky with his semen. When he finally seemed to relax, he exhaled deeply, pulling out some extra napkins that came with the food earlier. He passed me one and I nodded before taking it, wiping my hand clean. “Always good to keep extra napkins handy,” I awkwardly said.

Eric chuckled softly. “Yeah, I guess I picked up the habit from my parents. Always keep some extra napkins on you, you never know when you need them.”

He tucked himself back into his pants and made himself decent again as I stood up and walked over to the trash can to throw out the soiled napkin. Eric and I just spent a few awkward moments just standing in front of each other shyly, neither of us quite knowing what to say. 

“Um…” Eric scratched the back of his neck, blushing wildly. “That was…”

“It was nice,” I said with a reassuring smile, knowing he was probably embarrassed. “I really liked seeing you like that.”

“I… I’ve never done anything like that with  _ anyone  _ before…” He said, looking down. “I can’t believe my first time doing anything sexual with someone was with  _ you.” _

“Do you regret it?” I asked him curiously, and he took a moment to think before shaking his head. “No, as you said… It was  _ nice.”  _

We just took a moment to smile at each other, before he cleared his throat. “Um… I guess we should get going now,” he said as I nodded. We walked back to the parking lot together before looking at each other again. “Thank you, Cody…” Eric said sincerely. “I… I had a lot of fun with you today.”

“I did too,” I said with a nod. 

He was blushing again, and kicked at a rock on the ground. “You know, you were always really cute, Cody,” he admitted, making me widen my eyes. “Kyle, Farid, and me… We always thought that. We’d never tell Nathan, though.” 

I began to blush as well. Even though him saying that didn’t surprise me much, it still made me feel good to hear that. All those sleepovers growing up, they’d be looking at me and thinking about how cute I was… 

He cleared his throat again. “A-anyways, I hope we can maybe do something like this again, sometime. I wouldn’t mind hanging out again if you’d want to.”

“Just hanging out?” I playfully asked as I raised a brow, and he chuckled awkwardly in embarrassment, making me laugh.

“Yeah, I’ll think about it. See you around, Eric,” I said to him with a nod as he nodded back. “See you, Cody.”

The two of us went our separate ways to our cars. I unlocked it and sat inside, closing the door before taking a deep breath. I turned on the radio and turned up the volume, hearing a chilled-out jazzy funk song come on. 

I thought about all three of Nathan’s friends—Kyle, Farid, and Eric. Growing up, they would always tease me along with Nathan… But I had done  _ something _ sexual with all three of them recently, and now it turns out they  _ always  _ thought I was cute? I never thought they did, and that they all hated me or something. I never really cared for whatever they thought of me, but somehow it feels  _ good  _ knowing this newfound information. They all wanted me, I was the pretty little brother of their best friend who was so cute, but  _ so _ off-limits. I was their forbidden fantasy.

_ Kyle is a brick-headed asshole, yet something about me likes seeing a hot jock like him get off… Farid is annoying, somewhat vain and cocky, but there's something charming about him, no wonder he's a playboy… And Eric is smart, sweet, and shy, and I think he's really cute…! _

I smiled to myself as I started my car.  _ I’m thinking of planning a reunion with the boys… The kind that I hope Nathan will never find out about.  _


	9. Part II - Chapter 8: Kyle, Farid, and Eric

I spent a while thinking about Nathan’s friends. 

I couldn’t help but jerk off before going to sleep at night imagining myself getting used by the three of them. The thought of them giving into their secret fantasies and finally getting to do something to me after lusting after me for years…  _ God,  _ it was so hot to think about. 

After taking about a good week to do my own thing and think about what I wanted to do, I finally decided to take my plans into action. 

I flopped backwards on my bed and composed a draft message in my phone, and set it to send to Kyle, Farid, and Eric individually. 

_ “Hey, my parents aren’t home Saturday night,”  _ I wrote out. I decided to be forward and get to the point. “ _ Maybe you would want to come over for a quick hookup at around 8pm?” _

I was a bit hesitant to send it, wondering if maybe it was  _ too  _ forward. But I decided to hit send before I could think twice about it, and immediately felt my heart begin to beat faster in my chest. 

I took a deep breath and just stared at the ceiling, trying not to overthink it.  _ C’mon, you’re not the prude and pure pretty virgin people think you are,  _ I tried to tell myself.  _ Yeah! You’re a whore who likes being used, a camboy who likes to be watched and admired, a dirty slut who loves being passed around like a toy.  _

I heard my phone chime and vibrate in my hand, and I saw a reply from Eric.  _ “Sure, I’m not doing anything then. :) I would love to come over. Should I bring anything?”  _

I smiled as I typed out a reply.  _ “No, don’t worry about that. Just keep an open mind, I want to try something a bit different.”  _ I hit send and sighed before staring up at the ceiling.  _ Eric’s pretty vanilla… Maybe he wouldn’t be into trying anything new,  _ I thought to myself.

After waiting for a few minutes, I got a reply from Eric.  _ “Something different? I hope I’ll be able to keep up… As long as you teach me, right? :) I’ll be there. See you then.”  _

I smiled to myself.  _ Okay, we got one in. Now I just have to wait for the other two.  _

* * *

I had a bit of time before I had to get ready for work. I decided to make a simple plain sandwich for lunch and watch some television. There was some kind of big fashion show in France happening at the moment.  _ I wonder what it would be like to be a model,  _ I thought to myself, taking a bite of my dry sandwich. A slender man walked down the runway in avant-garde fashion with makeup to match.  _ I think I’d probably make a good model…  _

I suddenly heard my phone chime and felt it vibrate, seeing a new message from Farid. I went into the app to see the message.  _ “Sounds great to me, pretty boy. I had to fit you into my busy schedule, so you should feel flattered. You live a bit far, but I’ll drive all the way down just for you. ;) Have you thought about what I suggested about making a movie together? ;)”  _

_ “No, it’s not like that, but it is something kind of unorthodox. I want you to keep an open mind about it,”  _ I typed out before sending.

I took another bite of my sandwich, watching a beautiful woman walk down the runway in a high fashion gown on the television before feeling my phone vibrate again.  _ “I’m curious as to what you have planned. You’re a bit kinky, aren’t you? I like that about you. You’re quiet, but full of surprises. See you Saturday. ;)”  _

_ Okay, so I have Farid and Eric confirmed… Now I just have to wait for Kyle,  _ I thought to myself.  _ I wonder what their reactions will be when they all see each other.  _ Thinking about it made me snicker out loud. 

I finished my sandwich as I continued to watch television before cleaning up and getting ready for work.

* * *

I was at work, performing as usual, waiting for the time to slowly count down. I didn’t have a shift with Wyatt or Katelyn that day, so I didn’t have much to keep me entertained. I just tried to muscle through the first half of my shift before I could finally go on break. 

I finally got to clock out for my break, and I immediately headed to the bathroom. I checked my phone that I hadn’t checked since before my shift started. It was a reply from Kyle, and it seemed that he attached a photo. 

I opened the messaging app to see the message stream with Kyle, blinking when I saw that he sent me a photo of him holding his erect cock, along with the message;  _ “U want this so bad, dont u, little whore” _

I couldn’t help but roll my eyes at his response. The photo was taken with flash on, so it had that snuff film quality to it that made me grit my teeth.  _ “That doesn’t answer my question,”  _ I typed out before sending it. 

I put my phone back in my pocket before washing my hands and drying them, heading to the back room so I could sit down and relax for a bit. I checked my phone again, seeing another response from Kyle.  _ “I’ll be there. What R we doing?”  _

I typed out my answer.  _ “It’s a surprise. Just keep an open mind,”  _ I finished typing before sending. 

Kyle responded almost immediately.  _ “As long as I get my dick down ur throat,”  _ is all he said, which made me roll my eyes again. 

I deleted the dick pic from Kyle, as I didn’t want to have to be greeted with that each time I opened our message stream. I opened up my ebook app so I could continue reading  _ Boy Cupid.  _ At this point in the book, the main character had slept with around fourteen different girls all in a span of a month, in what he believed to be taking away the pain of heartbreak.

I took a moment to think about myself _. Well, it’s not fourteen, but I fooled around with all three of Nathan’s best friends in a matter of only a few weeks, so I guess that counts for something.  _ I felt proud of myself.  _ There’s nothing wrong with some temporary sexy fun, right? I can get any man to lust over me without barely doing a thing. I’m no longer the innocent pretty boy everyone thinks is some kind of angel.  _

I snickered to myself.  _ I’m just a sexy boy succubus. And I love it.  _

* * *

The day had finally come. I was lounging on the couch in the living room, dressed in a loose T-shirt and shorts, scrolling through social media on my phone as I waited until eight. I was so excited for the boys to come over… 

I hummed quietly as I mindlessly kept liking posts on my feed. I heard the sounds of cars pulling up outside, and I looked through the blinds to see three cars parking along the curb. The three men emerged from each car, all seemingly confused as to why each other were here. It seemed to lead into a bit of a bicker between them in the middle of the street, which made me smirk to myself. 

They all came walking up to the porch of my house, in which I quickly moved away from the window and heard the sound of the doorbell being repeatedly rung. I walked over to the front door to open it with a smile. “Hey,” is all I said, seeing a mix of confusion, irritability, and disappointment on the faces of all three men. 

“You better have a good explanation for why you brought  _ all  _ of us here,” Kyle said as he crossed his arms and gave me an annoyed look. I stepped back and gestured for them to come in. “Yeah, yeah. Just come in and follow me,” I said, leaving the door open for them. They took their shoes off in the foyer before I led them down the hallway and to my bedroom. 

“So, you’re gonna tell us why the hell you invited us all over?” Farid asked. He didn’t seem upset, but he seemed rather  _ curious.  _ I closed the door and sat on my bed while the three men only looked at me, awaiting an answer. 

I smiled at them, crossing my legs. “Why do you think?” I asked them, raising a brow. “You’re all here for one thing, yeah?” 

The three took a moment to figure out what was going on. Farid widened his eyes and gasped when he figured it out, while Eric just blushed and shyly rubbed the back of his neck as he looked down at the floor. Kyle sat in my desk chair and had to take a bit longer to think, and his brows knit in anger when he put the pieces together. “I’m not having a foursome with these two idiots,” he coldly spat. 

I almost wanted to laugh, since Kyle was clearly the biggest idiot out of all of them. “I wasn’t planning on that… I actually wanted the three of you to share me.” 

The three of them seemed to be confused as to what I meant by that. “Does that mean no foursome?” Farid asked, seeming to be slightly disappointed as Kyle shook his head and rolled his eyes. “Only in your dreams.” 

“Come on, you  _ know  _ you want a piece of this,” Farid teased him, winking as Kyle pretended to vomit. “Fuck you, bro. I’m not into that gay shit.” 

Farid’s face twisted in confusion. “Then why did you come here?” 

“Cody’s different, he’s basically a  _ girl.” _

“Are you idiots done? I didn’t invite you all over here to argue,” I said in an annoyed tone. Kyle and Farid shut up, while Eric was seemingly quiet, still awkwardly standing there twiddling his thumbs. 

“Why are you doing this?” Eric shyly asked. “N-not that there’s anything wrong with it, I respect your hustle and all… But I’m really curious.”

I tapped my chin in thought. “Well… In the words of Kyle himself, nineteen is the age of experimentation, isn’t it?” I quoted, winking at Kyle. 

“The fuck are you talking about?” Kyle asked, looking at me as if I had three heads. “Can we get to the part where you’re sucking my dick already?”

I rolled my eyes and ignored him. “Anyway, you all probably figured out by now that I’ve hooked up with all of you, so I decided it would be fun if I invited you all over,” I explained. “Don’t worry. You won’t be touching each other, you’ll just all be touching  _ me.  _ That sound good?” 

The three looked at each other in question, and they all seemed to shrug or nod. I smiled. “No objections? Good.” I reached for the bottom of my shirt before slipping it off over my head. “But before we get to that, how about if I get you all nice and aroused with a bit of a  _ show?” _

I bit my lip as I looked at the three of them, my hand slowly sliding down my body as I groped myself through my shorts. They seemed to become interested now, watching me attentively while I rubbed myself and let out soft sighs. 

I slowly slid my shorts down my legs, letting them drop to the floor as I rubbed my dick through my underwear with one hand while I held myself up on the bed with the other arm. I parted my lips and let out little whimpers and moans as the three men seemed  _ very  _ much interested, as if watching a porn movie right in front of their eyes. 

I continued to tease myself with my hand, feeling myself getting harder from knowing the men were watching me, wanting me,  _ needing  _ me. Farid licked his lips and I could see himself growing hard in his pants, Eric was blushing wildly as he just watched with curious wide-eyes, while Kyle leaned back in the chair and was smirking, openly palming himself through his sweatpants. “Take it off already, bitch,” he muttered to me, the other two men looking at him questioningly. 

I softly chuckled. “So eager. You’re really a pervert, Mr. Bridges,” I teased, slowly pulling down the waistband of my briefs before letting my cock free, tossing my underwear aside. I pulled my knees up and spread my legs, exposing my ass, balls, and dick all for their viewing pleasure. 

“Fuck yeah,” Kyle said, groping himself harder through his pants. “You’re so fucking cute, and I fucking love those freckles on your ass. God, I want to fuck you until you’re screaming my name.”

“You’re really verbal, aren’t you?” Farid asked with a bit of amusement in his voice. “Never knew you were like that.” 

“Shut up. Just look at him, he’s fucking gorgeous,” Kyle insisted, as I stuck my tongue out playfully at them.

Farid smirked, lightly groping himself. “You’re definitely right about that. I swear, I’d  _ pay  _ just to get one night to do whatever I want with him. Don’t you agree, Eric?” 

Eric was taken aback by the sudden question. “D-definitely,” is all he could muster to say, blushing and smiling to himself. 

I spat into my hand before grabbing my dick with a whimper, slowly stroking myself as the three watched me with lust in their gazes. It felt so  _ good  _ to touch myself like this with three handsome men watching me, I really felt like such a whore. I felt powerful. 

Kyle undid the drawstring of his pants before pulling them down his hips along with his underwear, pulling out his cock as he began to jerk himself off while watching me. I was surprised he would really just  _ whip it out  _ like that, but it didn’t really matter to me—all I wanted was to get them going, anyway. 

I let out sighs and moans the more I tugged and squeezed my hard cock, my other hand moving down to cup my balls as I bit my lip and hummed wantonly in pleasure. Though Kyle was openly jerking himself, Farid seemed to only fondle himself through his pants, while Eric seemed much too embarrassed to touch himself even a little bit—but I could tell he was getting hard. 

_ Poor boys, they want to get off so badly,  _ I thought to myself as I moved my hand further downward, spreading my hole open, showing off the inside of my boy pussy as I felt my face heat up. 

I took the fingers of my other hand into my mouth, sucking on them and getting them nice and wet before bringing them down my body, probing my fingers at my entrance as I gasped and shut my eyes, slowly pushing my fingers inside. I softly moaned as I felt myself clench around my moist fingers. 

I began to finger myself, thrusting my fingers within myself as I kept letting sweet whimpers slip from my mouth while my other hand went back to jerking my cock. “Nnn… You all want me so badly,” I whined out, arching my back off the bed with a sigh as I moved my hand that was jerking me faster. “I’m so pretty, you all want to take me, use me,  _ fuck  _ me…” 

I was fully erect now, feeling both so shy but so damn  _ naughty  _ at the same time. I pulled my fingers from me and let go of my erection, shifting my body as I positioned myself on my knees. “Alright, all of you come here,” I directed, pointing at the edge of my bed as the men followed. Farid excitedly stood on the left of me, Kyle stood in the middle as was still jerking himself off, and Eric shyly shuffled his way to my right side. 

I beckoned them to come closer as they moved in. “Okay… Whose cock will I be sucking?” I asked, looking up at all of them. 

“Mine, of course,” Kyle said before the other two could say anything. I raised a brow. “Well, only if that’s okay with the other two,” I said.

Farid shrugged. “It would be  _ nice  _ to get sucked off, but seeing how  _ excited  _ Kyle is… He can have this one,” he said with a nod. 

I looked at Eric for his answer as well. He just awkwardly rubbed his arm and smiled nervously. “I’m fine with anything, I don’t mind.” 

I smiled. “Okay… So take out your cocks,” I said to them, before they obliged and undid their pants, pulling their erections out. I took Kyle’s cock and rubbed my cheek against it as I looked up at him innocently. “You just want me all to yourself, don’t you?” I asked him.

“Fuck yeah. I wish we could get rid of these two so I can rail you on this bed until you can’t walk for weeks,” Kyle muttered, grabbing a fistful of my hair as he rubbed his cock on my face. 

I smiled. “Don’t be like that, I’m gonna suck your dick, aren’t I? You should feel lucky,” I said before taking his hard member into my mouth, slowly sliding it down my throat. I was getting a lot better at deepthroating, practicing on vegetables for my stream viewers must have helped. 

I grabbed the cocks of the other two in each hand, slowly stroking the both of them at the same time as they both let out moans at the contact. I let Kyle set the pace in my mouth, as he moved my head on him with his grip in my hair. He began to slowly move my mouth back and forth on him before picking up the pace, eager to get as much pleasure from me as possible.

I looked up at the men while I continued to work them with my mouth and my hands. They all looked so sexy with their different expressions—Farid was lost in his pleasure as he would bite down on his lip or moan and close his eyes with each squeeze I gave his cock, Kyle had a smug look on his face as he continued to sloppily fuck my mouth, while Eric was completely flushed and was sputtering out curses as I twisted my wrist and continued pleasing him with my hand. 

Kyle pulled out his phone, turning it sideways before I heard the sound of the beginning of a recording. “I gotta film this shit. It’s so fucking hot,” he said as he pointed the phone camera down at me. I looked up into the camera, deciding to play it up as I fluttered my lashes and took Kyle’s dick like a champ as he kept thrusting into my mouth. “Yeah, Cody’s a good little bitch,” he said with a chuckle. “Taking my dick down his throat like a whore.” 

“Don’t get my cock into the shot, I’m shy,” Farid teased, but Kyle shifted his eyes at him. “Hey, I’m the only one who’s supposed to be talking while filming. Hearing your voice watching this later is gonna instantly kill my climax.” 

“Why are you filming, anyway? Weird as hell for that,” Farid said in an annoyed tone. 

“‘Cause I fucking want to. I like taking pics and vids of whatever bitch I’m fucking. Makes nice fap material for later,” Kyle said as he continued to thrust into my mouth, making me hum around his cock. He let me pull my mouth off of him, and I spat on it again. I opened my mouth and let my tongue lick the underside of his cock, up to the head before smiling and winking at the camera, going back to take him in my mouth again. 

“Fuck…” Kyle muttered out. “You’re really something else.” 

I continued to jerk the two boys quicker, stroking and tugging on their cocks. I could see pre-cum pooling at the tip of Eric’s dick, while Farid was running a hand through his hair as he thrusted up into my hand. Kyle kept filming me as I continued moving my mouth back and forth on him as he kept thrusting into me, feeling the tip of his cock hitting the back of my throat with each heave. I could tell they were all getting close to their orgasm. 

I let go of their cocks and moved my mouth off of Kyle’s dick, as they all looked at me in disappointment. I gestured for Kyle to move back as he took a step back, and I shifted myself to move off of the bed and get down on my knees on the floor. “I want you all to cum on my face,” I said sweetly. 

“I admit, I’ve always wanted to do a group facial,” Farid said with a smile as the other two men gave him a strange look. “What?” He asked them. 

I shook my head before smiling at them again. I looked up at them with the cutest gaze I could give them, opening my mouth as they all moved in closer, pointing their cocks at my face as they all quickly jerked themselves while panting. 

I watched them all, amazed at these beautiful men with gorgeous cocks jerking off to me, waiting for them to reach their climax and release their seed on my beautiful face. I began stroking myself as well, jerking myself quickly with my hand along with them.

And just like that, the three of them came—starting with the shy and vanilla Eric, who cried loudly in pleasure as he squeezed his cock as his cum splattered on my face as I shut my eyes, then the charming and handsome Farid, who let out a low  _ ‘fuck’  _ as he ejaculated onto my face next, and lastly, the horny douchebag Kyle, who spurt out a heavy load that painted over most of my face and landed in my mouth. I came right along with them, feeling my body tremble as my mind went blank and my cock erupted with semen onto my hand. 

I took a moment to catch my breath as I slowly opened my eyes, seeing Kyle snapping photos of me. “Fucking stunning. Like a work of art,” he muttered lowly as he licked his lips, continuing to snap pictures, the other boys agreeing as they admired how  _ gorgeous  _ I looked with my face covered in their seed. I couldn’t tell whose cum was whose, but the feeling and taste of the mixture of all the men’s semen was  _ amazing.  _

“Do I look pretty like this?” I asked the men, looking up at them with doe eyes and pouting my lip.

“Hell yeah, prettier than any fucking girl. Wish I could keep you and use your body whenever I want,” Kyle commented with a smirk. Even though he would always say shit like that, it still made me feel good inside that he liked me so much to say something like that.

“You’re beautiful, Cody. Seriously. I’m gonna be honest, out of all the men and women I’ve hooked up with, you’re probably my favourite,” Farid said, showing off his bright smile. “I still would love to  _ collaborate _ with you again…” 

I looked at Eric and he shyly scratched his head as his face flushed red. “Of course, Cody… I never thought I’d get to see you like this, but you’ve really awakened something within me, and taught me a lot about how fun sex can be.” 

I smiled at them before getting up, walking over to my clothes hamper to reach for a dirty T-shirt to wipe myself clean with. I tossed it back into the hamper before looking at the men. “Um… I didn’t really plan this far ahead when I invited you all here,” I admitted, sheepishly rubbing the back of my neck. “I don’t really know what to do now. I don’t have any food to offer, sorry.”

“I was gonna leave anyway,” Kyle said with a shrug, walking by me as he slapped my ass, making me yelp. “See you around, pretty boy. I’ll show myself out. Make sure you see me again sometime,” he said before walking out of my room. 

I blushed before looking at the other two. Farid checked his phone and sighed. “I should probably get going, too. I just got a booty call text from one of my co-workers,” he said as he winked at me. I raised a brow at him. “So… You’re hopping from one hook-up straight to another?” 

Farid ran a hand through his hair. “Hey, don’t knock the hustle, am I right? You know how it is, Cody. Hit me up if you ever want to play around again,” he said as he blew me a kiss, walking out of my room. I didn’t really have the right to say anything about that, ‘cause I was probably  _ worse.  _

I shyly looked down before looking back at Eric, a moment of silence between us. “Are you going to head out, too?” 

“I’d really love to stay, Cody…” He rubbed his arm and looked away, sighing. “But unfortunately, I still have a lot of paperwork to do for work waiting for me at home that I need to submit by tomorrow morning. I’m really sorry,” he said in a sincere voice, as if he really did want to stay. 

I shook my head and smiled. “Don’t worry about it, Eric. Um…” I blushed deeper. “You guys won’t tell Nathan about any of this, right?” 

“I won’t,” Eric said with a nod. “I’ll make sure the others won’t either.” 

“Thank you,” I said with a smile. I began to quickly dress back up before I walked Eric back to the front door of my house. He turned and smiled at me. “Th-thank you for inviting me, Cody. I had fun.” 

“I did too,” I said with a nod. “I’ll see you around.” 

Eric nodded back at me. “Yeah. See you, Cody,” he said before I opened the door and let him out, closing the door behind him as I turned around and leaned back on the door with a deep exhale. 

_ So… All that just happened.  _ I smiled to myself.  _ Now that I’ve got Nathan’s friends under my spell, I wonder what will be next for me…  _

* * *

I was definitely not ready for what was next for me. 

I spent the next few weeks after my  _ not- _ foursome with the boys doing my own thing and focusing on myself. Honestly, that sexual encounter with them lasted me for a good while, and I needed a break to just chill out and stay in my lane. I was an introvert after all, and I needed to recharge my social  _ and  _ sexual batteries. 

I was feeling okay, spending my time focusing on my two jobs. It seemed that Wyatt and Katelyn may have begun dating, as I’d always see them flirting in their own way with each other whenever I had shifts with them. 

Life was pretty okay, and I decided that soon I would have to make plans for what I would do after I was done recharging.  _ Would I continue to see Nathan’s friends? Should I try downloading an app to meet and hook up with new guys? Whatever I decide to do, I just want some fun. I don’t want to get attached to anyone and end up heartbroken again.  _

It wasn’t until I received a phone call one night that things in my life had definitely begun to change. It was an evening when I came home straight from working at the store, and I saw that I had a missed call from Nathan.

Nathan  _ never  _ called me, or even texted me for that matter. I gulped and began to feel a nervous buildup in my stomach, hoping that he didn’t find out about what I didn’t want him to know about. 

I called him back, taking a deep breath as I heard the sound of two rings before he picked up. “Cody, hey,” he said in a soft tone.

“Nathan, did you mean to call me earlier?” I asked him, laying down on my bed as I nervously played with the collar of my uniform shirt. 

“Yeah, yeah I did,” he said. A silent pause. “I wanted to talk to you about something, but not over the phone. It’s… something I’d prefer to talk to you about in person. And not with mom and dad, just with you.” 

I closed my eyes for a moment and took a deep inhale. “Okay, so… Come over when you’re free and we’ll talk. Is it serious?” 

He was silent for a little while before answering. “Yeah, a little bit. Look, I’ll come over this weekend, if you’re not working or anything. It’s really important that I talk to you about this.” 

“Alright. This weekend it is,” I said. 

“Okay. See you then,” is all Nathan said before he hung up. I sighed deeply and clapped my hands together, closing my eyes.  _ Dear God… If you’re listening, please don’t let whatever Nathan wants to talk about be about the sinful acts I’ve committed with his friends. Amen.  _ I did the sign of the cross in hopes that the lord would hear me. 

* * *

The day had finally come when Nathan and I would have our talk. I was pretty nervous, because he didn’t tell me what he wanted to discuss other than that it was a topic much too serious to talk about over the phone. 

The doorbell rang, and I took a deep breath before standing up from the living room couch and heading to the door to answer it. It was Nathan, standing there with a somewhat troubled look on his face. “Hey.”

“Hey,” I said back with a nod. “Who is it?” Our mother called out from the kitchen and I sighed. “It’s Nathan, ma,” I called back, and she quickly came over to the door and smiled when she saw him. “Nathan! What a lovely surprise.” 

“Hey, ma,” Nathan greeted, the two taking a moment to hug each other. “What’s got you dropping by?” She asked him.

“I’m gonna take Cody for a drive,” Nathan said, gesturing to his car that was parked in our driveway. “There’s something I wanna talk about with him.” 

“Oh? Well, drive safely,” is all she said before nodding to both of us and returning to the kitchen as she hummed a happy tune. 

I looked at Nathan. “A drive?” 

He nodded. “Yeah. That way mom or dad don’t eavesdrop or walk in on what we’re going to be talking about,” he said. “Now, let’s go.” 

He began to walk off the porch and to his car as I sighed and followed.  _ Why do I have a feeling that this talk isn’t going to be a good one…  _

* * *

Both of us were silent as Nathan drove. Nothing but the sound of the noisy pop music coming from the radio station that was on could be heard. I wanted to change it, but Nathan was probably into this kind of music. 

I was just watching out the window as he drove along, my heart beating quickly in my chest out of anxiety.

“So,” he finally said, stopping at a red light. “How have you been doing?” 

“Okay,” is all I said, propping my elbow up against the car door as I leaned my head on my hand.

“I see. That’s good,” he said with a nod, proceeding after the light turned green. “You’re working at the grocery store near our high school, right?”

I sighed deeply. “Can we cut to the chase? I’m gonna go nuts over this useless smalltalk when there’s clearly an elephant in the room.” 

Nathan sighed as well as he continued to drive along. “I’m just… Scared to ask about it.” 

“Well, you’re scaring me by making it seem so ominous,” I replied. 

We both went silent again before Nathan pulled up to a parking spot in a plaza parking lot. “Alright, I’m going to ask,” Nathan said before taking a deep breath, turning down the radio. “Did you… Have sex with Kyle, Farid, and Eric?” 

I suddenly felt a sharp pain in my gut, as if I had been stabbed. I felt my body go numb as my head became dizzy. My worst fear became reality. 

My silence must have answered for me, because Nathan continued. “Look, I just want to make sure they didn’t  _ force  _ you to do anything that you didn’t want to do, because if so, I’m definitely going to have some real issues with them.” 

“No, they didn’t force me to do anything,” I said, which was a little bit of a lie considering Kyle practically blackmailed me back at Nathan’s party. “It was all consensual.” 

I tried not to look at Nathan and rather just stared out the window, but I could tell he was concerned. I felt extremely uncomfortable talking about this with him. 

“Why?” He quietly asked, which immediately pissed me off. “‘Why?’ I don’t know, because it’s fun to fuck guys who’ve been admiring me for years, letting them have their way with me and making me feel like I’m  _ special,”  _ I snapped. “And I know! I know maybe it’s wrong to get attention that way, but  _ god!  _ I just want to be a slut!” I yelled it all out, letting out a deep sigh at the end as I felt my eyes tear up.

Nathan was silent for a while. “Cody…” He exhaled deeply. “I don’t care about whatever lifestyle you choose. But are you  _ happy _ living your life like this?” 

“Of course I am,” I said, yet I was beginning to cry. “Daniel and Julian only gave me heartbreak. That’s what happens when I fall in love,” I said, tears streaming down my face as I sniffled. “I just… Don’t want to be the  _ perfect little angel  _ people expect me to be. I want to live life and have  _ fun,  _ because life’s too short not to indulge in  _ temporary  _ bliss.” 

Nathan slowly nodded. “I see,” is all he said before silence fell on us again. “Cody, I hope you know that I’ll always support whatever you do. No matter what it is. I just want you to be happy,” he said, placing a hand on my shoulder as I wiped my face with my sleeves. 

“You don’t care that I’m gay?” 

He shook his head. “You’re my little brother. I’ll always love you no matter what,” he said with a small smile. “I just don’t want you to hurt yourself, physically or emotionally. But if this is what you want, it’s not my place to tell you what you should or shouldn’t do.”

I took a moment to close my eyes and take a deep breath in before slowly exhaling. “How did you find out about me and your friends?” 

Nathan took his hand away and sighed. “Last weekend I went out to a bar with them. We had some shots,” he said. “I went to the bathroom, and when I came back, I overheard them talking about the…  _ sexual encounter  _ the four of you had, and how they would want to…” He cleared his throat.  _ “‘Fuck you again,’”  _ he finished with air quotations before he shook his head. “I assumed that they had done something to you against your will. I cussed them out before walking out on them. I had to ask you myself first, because I would have done  _ much  _ worse to them if that was the case.” 

“Really?” I asked, genuinely surprised by his answer. He nodded. “Of course. They may be my best friends since elementary school, but if they  _ ever _ laid a hand on you without your consent…” He clenched his fist. “Well, let’s just say you’d never see them ever again.” 

I gave him a small smile. “Thank you, Nathan,” I said. “We weren’t really that close growing up, so I just assumed that you didn’t care about me.”

“Of course I care about you. I didn’t mean to make you feel that way, it’s just… I was really introverted. But ever since I went to university and met wonderful friends who helped me open up and see life differently… I’ve become a lot more social and learned to express myself more. I hope that it isn’t too late to build a relationship with you, Cody.”

“Definitely not,” I said with a smile. The two of us leaned in to share a hug, and it felt so nice to know that Nathan was on my side and would support me no matter what. 

The two of us pulled away and Nathan smiled at me. “How about we get some burgers or something? On me. And you can tell me all about this ‘Daniel’ and ‘Julian’ you speak of.”

I nodded. “Yeah. But can we keep it between us? I’m not really ready for mom and dad to know about everything yet…” 

“Yeah, no problem. Your secret’s safe with me, I promise.” 

I just smiled back at him before Nathan started the car again and turned up the radio before he pulled out of the parking spot, and we headed out to go get some grub.

“And Cody?” 

I looked at him. “Yeah?” 

Nathan continued driving down the road, tapping his thumbs on the steering wheel along with the rhythm of the music playing from the radio. “I hope you know that you’ll find your true love one day. As cheesy as that sounds, it’s true. Falling in love doesn’t always lead to heartbreak. One day, you’ll find someone that will love you unconditionally. You just have to be patient.”

I went back to watching the view out the window. For once, I felt genuine brotherly love for Nathan. I felt so much better letting all that out, and having him accept me despite it all. It made me truly grateful to have him in my life.

And I really hoped that he was right.

* * *

Over half a year had passed since that talk with Nathan. Nothing really eventful had happened in those months, but Nathan and I spent more time together which was mostly just us playing video games in his old bedroom at home. I wasn’t into video games before, and I wasn’t very good at them either—but it was nice that we had something to do together while we talked. I found that we had become a lot closer as brothers since then, and it made me happy. I’m sure our parents were very happy seeing us bonding, too. 

Other than that, life was just how it usually was. I would work my silly little shifts at the grocery store, do my silly little thing on  _ Flumblr  _ and  _ LiveDream,  _ and read my silly little books. I had finally finished  _ Boy Cupid,  _ in which the protagonist finally gave up his bachelor ways and came out, then settled down with his best friend. It was a cute and happy ending, and it made me think a lot about what Nathan said about  _ ‘true love.’  _

I hadn’t hooked up with Nathan’s friends since  _ that  _ one time, I guess they felt scared to hit me up again after Nathan found out. And to me, it just felt weird to continue seeing them after Nathan knew. I didn’t really know how to describe it other than it being  _ weird.  _ So I just stuck to focusing on my grind and getting my rocks off to either my imagination or to some saucy erotic fiction. 

Before I knew it, 2018 came around and I was already twenty years old. It felt weird to be reaching my twenties already—It felt like just yesterday I was a fourteen year old starting high school for the first time. Nia wasn’t able to make it for my twentieth birthday, but she sent me a funny e-card with a meaningful message and a gift card for a department store. 

Other than that, everything was just business as usual. It wasn’t until that one fated day sometime in April while I was working on one of my shifts down at the grocery store where everything changed.

It was a very busy day. I was one of the few cash register lanes that were open, for God knows why. I didn’t care about my quality of service on that shift—all I would do was quickly scan and bag groceries before waiting for the customer to pay, then rip their receipt out of the machine and hand them their bags before they were on their way, and then repeat with the next person in line. 

I went through this mindless process, completely doing everything off automatic routine instinct—until a somewhat familiar voice called out my name. 

“Cody? Cody Vale?” 

It snapped me out of my robotic mode, completely catching me off guard. I looked up, feeling my heart completely drop inside of me, my eyes widening as I swore that I had probably dropped whatever was in my hands at the moment as time completely froze. I felt like I either wanted to vomit or run away.

Because the next person in line was the first boy I ever loved. His name could barely leave my lips as I looked into his eyes. 

“D-Daniel…?” 


End file.
